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- Advice & Tips for Women in Relationships
Criteria for a Perfect Bridegroom.
Someone asked me to right a hub to explain the criteria for a Christian bridegroom.
Before you choose to get married, we have to look at a few points. We must first establish where your relationship stands (if you are already in a relationship) before we can look at what the criteria of the Christian bridegroom is.
1) Are you in a sexual relationship?
2) Is it a Christ based relationship without sex?
3) Are you not yet in a relationship, but looking.
The sexual relationship:
When you are a Christian and have crossed this no go zone of indulging in sexual intercourse, you have to make some drastic changes if you want your marriage to succeed.
When a man and woman come together, they become one. God said that all sin is outside the body, but sexual sins are inside the body. We are not intended to have sex before marriage, as sex binds us together in covenant.
Semen contains blood or when a virgin is taken, there is blood.
If you grow closer to God, you will grow closer to your partner!
The perfect bridegroom!
After reading this hub page, do you understand relationships and marriage better?
Let us look at blood covenants as this explains the results of intercourse best. Whereblood flows during intercourse, outside of marriage, there is a blood altar between Satan and the sin you have committed. This gives the enemy the power to destroy your marriage in the future.
Are you both children of God that want to make a success of your relationship and marriage? If you have never made the Lord Jesus your Lord and Savior, your relationship has an 80% chance of failure. If only one is reborn and the other is still in the world, it will not work, split or repent.
• First, if you are in a sexual relationship and you are both saved, you have to goand sit opposite your partner and tell your partner all your past wrongs, strong points, previous relationships and sexual history, your weaknesses and sins. This will strip the enemy of all power to come between you in the future with any accusations of the past. This action will also set you free from the fear of him or her finding out something that could hurt them at a later stage.
Most people do not agree with this step as they say the past is the past. If you and your partner agree that it is not necessary, then no future revelations should impact the existing marriage. This however is not always the case.
You will be tested on this honesty in the future, and if you are not honest, it can break your relationship.
After both of you has shared all their bad and good things, your partner now has the choice to say – “Yes, I still see fit to carry on with this relationship” or “No, let’s go our separate ways”. This gives each of you the chance to make an informed decision about the other person. If you really love one another, this will be an easy decision.
After this exercise you now have to make decisions; get married or split up. Then you need to agree to no more sex till you are married. Repent and ask God to destroy the altar you have built in sin.
• Now go sit down together and decide when you are married, who is going tocontrol the finances, how many children you want, where you are going to live,ect. You need to agree on all these things before hand. Some of these issues become deal breakers, so it is best to sort it out before marriage. There are many traditions in different cultures and these traditions can also affect the marriage. When you marry as a Christian, the Bible is your guide to the perfect marriage.
The woman must honor her husband, meaning he is the highest authority in her life. Honoring a man does not mean that you are his floor rag. It means that his word carries authority in you life. When you honor him, he won’t have problems with his ego and you give him the power to be the man God called him to be. You empower your man by honoring him.
Likewise, men, cut those strings with mummy, and cling to your woman. When you love her unconditionally, hiding her flaws and presenting her best to others, she will shine for you. You will empower her to be the best that she can be.
• Set a date for as soon as possible, because sin waits around the corner to destroy your life or marriage. The most common excuse is; “We do not have money”. You only need a pastor and 2 witnesses. Rather get married now than ruin your love because of your disobedience to God’s word. This is serious. You can always have a ceremony later when you have the money, even if it is years later. Many people renew their vows with a full marriage service. You can do it too when your finances are right.
Yes all new Brides wants a big wedding, but it is better to get married with a small wedding than to chance going to hell. I always suggest that the money they would have spent on the wedding could be used for better usages, example, deposit for a flat or buy new furniture. If you make a loan and then have to start a new life without anything, your marriage will be spoiled by hardships and even possible failure. To start up in today’s life is almost impossible without help from your parents.
Don’t fly higher than your finances allow, because everything will come with time.
A Christian relationship abstaining from sexual activity.
Here another set of rules apply.
You and your partner have to go to marriage counseling for two years, if possible. In counseling you would be introduced to compatibility tests. You will receive guidance onhow to overcome obstacles, how to work together, ect.
The dating game will be explained. To go on a date, don’t go to a movie; you will be watching the movie and have very little interaction. Rather go to a nice quiet place, where you can share and talk. This way you will build relationship.
The next phase will be to work together on outreaches where food will be given out to the poor. Here you will see the “true partner” and her or his character. Do they love people, if not; do you think he will love your children?
A person can only keep a mask up for so long. As their heart is revealed, the true person will show through. We are all like labels on a clear glass bottle. You cannot see yourself but the rest of the world can clearly see you. They not only see the label but what is in the bottle as well. Who is the writer of your life’s book? Is it bitterness & strife, peace and love, positivity or negativity? This is why going on outreaches together is so important. When you spend time with him for longer times working in not so perfect conditions, thiswill expose their level of patience, show how much they really care for others and it will be a good indicator of what will follow after you get married.
Cry together and laugh together but the most important thing is to pray together. By praying together you will see the true relationship between your partner and the Lord. This is the most important thing in your young life. If there is no relationship between God and your partner, the chances is that there is also no healthy relationship between you and your partner.
Under no circumstances should you get involved if you are being pressured into sex. If your partner tries to manipulate or force you, get out. Rather be alone than be with someone who is going to dominate and control you into all kinds of sexual sin. Don’t fall for the story that we can have sex now and later we get married that is still sex before marriage. As we discussed above, this starts off the relationship with altars to false gods.Get married and then you can have all you want. Sex is beautiful. It is holy and pleasingto God only within the Marriage.
Not yet in a relationship, looking!
Well you first have to get a partner, obviously.
The best way is to first ask God to send you the right one. Keep on praying for the right partner without stopping. God will send the right person into your life.
Go out, and sign up for hobbies like cat shows, gardening or whatever you like. If he is also interested in the same things you are, that is already a bonus. Join a house church or home cell to meet people. Always remember if you go look in a bar, you will get a drunk as a partner and no; you can not change him/her. Later when the children are there he will be in the bar helping you gets rid of your money. The rule is “Garbage in garbage out”.
Don’t go look for a partner, you will only get hurt. Wait upon the Lord; He is a rewarder for those that seek Him.
Set yourself in the right place to meet him.
Let God do the choosing, He is never wrong.
The perfect Bridegroom:
Sorry to disappoint you, He is already being taken, sitting at the right hand of God the Father. His name is Jesus Christ.
For the rest, well, there are no perfect bridegrooms.
Look for these qualities in a man;
- He makes you laugh,
- He can support you emotional, financially and in every other way you need.
- “Looks” does not really count so much;
- He must be patient,
- He must be loving and caring.
Don’t follow the world in thinking he must be built like an army tank, abs and a six pack. That will all be gone after a few years.
He must be a spiritually stable man, loving Jesus Christ more than he loves you. He must be of sober habits and clean living.
Then he will look after you till the day of his death or yours.
He must love his family, and then he will be able to love you and your family together.
If at all possible, try to have a good relationship with his mother and so he with yours.
In-laws affect a marriage deeply.
Many women choose a man and then they try to “save” him and change him into who they believe he should be. If you cannot love him as he is, why are you with him?
Take care to get to know him first, then love him unconditionally. Find a man who can do the same for you.
There is nothing as powerful as unconditional love. This kind of love will make each of you want to please one another and you will just grow closer and closer.
Be blessed with this information and I pray only the best for you in marriage.
- Criteria for the Bride of Christ!
As the Lord fights for Jerusalem, so The King of Kings (Jesus) fights for His Bride. The work of the Bride is to prepare herself for the Bridegroom by separating herself from all unholiness.