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Do Opposites Attract? Unfortunately They Do.

Updated on June 19, 2013
poemsforkush.com  Romance
poemsforkush.com Romance

Ah Romance. Such a wonderful thing. Butterflies in the tummy, sweaty hands, fluttering hearts.

Chocolates, flowers and that wonderful first kiss. Poets and writers throughout time have quoted the attraction of opposites.

Here are two quotes that show the magic of how opposite's attract. Even though they may not be talking about love and romance the point is the same. Love side steps all boundaries. When we love we lose all sense of why we love. We just do.

Romance brings people together from all parts of the world. And strangely we often fall in love with the last person we thought we would find attractive.

John Steinbeck

What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness.

Hermann Hesse

We are the sun and moon dear friend, it is not our purpose to become each other,

it is to recognise each other, to learn to see the other and honor him for what he is,

each the others opposite, and complement.



living.msn.com
living.msn.com

Why do we love?

The human race has an inbuilt gene that makes us want and need a mate. We feel lost without someone to love us.

Not only does our natural instinct draw us to meet, fall in love and marry, we have a biological clock that tells us we need to have children and not leave it too late before we start the wonderful thing called parenthood.

But there are other reasons why we fall in love.

The art of attraction is a funny thing. When we are growing up we presume that someday we will marry a person who is a compliment to our needs. For example, we love sport, going out, being extrovert and having a great social life. We presume that the person who is going to share our life is going to be of similar needs.

Then something happens. We find ourselves attracted to someone who is the total opposite of our idea of how our mate should be.

The guy who works in the library. The history teacher at the nearby college. Book people.

Why?

the-gaggle.com Opposites Attract
the-gaggle.com Opposites Attract

The Attraction of Opposites.

There is a reason for finding romance with someone who is totally opposite to you in every way. If you think about it, would you really want someone else constantly doing the same things as you, and maybe achieving a higher standard than you can reach?

Whether it be sport, academic studies or music, you want and need to achieve the highest grade that you can get. If you have a partner who is also learning in the same field can you imagine what it would be like if he or she beat you to it every time?

Then of course there is the quality time you get to spend together. They say change is as good as a rest, so surely its better if you choose a romantic relationship with someone who is totally different to you.

All week you work in an office. Your partner on the other hand is a gardener. Perfect. You have different things to talk about, places to go and maybe you will even learn to love walking around garden centres, taking trips to country houses and so on. You never realised before that it would interest you.

So that's a good thing, right? Well no, not exactly.

www.mehek.in
www.mehek.in

Personality Clash

To fall in love with your complete opposite can cause major problems. To start with you love the way he or she can keep calm while your volatile nature makes you explode at the first sign of trouble.

And what if he loves going out every night when you like to sit indoors cosying up on the sofa?

To start with, the differences are fine. You know you will find a happy medium. So what if he is untidy? You love cleaning. He loves lots of animals, you don't, but hey, you know you will get to love all the dogs, cats and strays he brings home.

But you have to remember one thing. As far as you were concerned, this partnership is for life.

And believe me, something is going to start that niggle at the back of your mind at some stage. Months or years pass, but sooner or later those differences will jump up to bite you on the backside.

Do Opposites Attract? Or is it just Fantasy?

seshat22.deviantart.com
seshat22.deviantart.com

Resolving our Differences

When we get married or live together we usually have family and friends around us. These keep us grounded and add variety to our lives. But as time goes on and family move away, friends get married and we find ourselves sitting in our own company that can be when the trouble starts. Especially if the children have flown the nest.

You suddenly find that all those quirks that made the relationship different start to drive you nuts. He still wants to go out every night, you want to stay in with him. His golf sessions seem to be getting more and more frequent, and you realise that the things you liked doing are now more or less inconsequential as you have lost track of those friends who did it with you.

But there is hope for the romance to rekindle. Take stock of what you have together. Try to become more involved in each others hobbies and friends. It can work, but you have to get out of the 'Its my hobby' situation. Listen to each other and even if you don't like their habits, try to find a middle ground.

Romance and love can be reignited. Your opposite attracts method can start to work again, you just have to find the love.


(c) Copyright Nell Rose


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    • Larry Fields profile image

      Larry Fields 4 years ago from Northern California

      Hi Nell,

      I'm a compleat idiot about relationships. I'll try to remember what you said here. Voted up, useful, and shared.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Lol! thanks Larry, me too! I married someone so opposite it's a wonder we come from the same planet! mind you there was a book called women are from venus.......! thanks for reading, nell

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      True words, Nell. Those little nagging differences magnify after a couple years of marriage and then where the hell are you? There better be one rock solid foundation of love to get you through.

    • profile image

      lovedoctor926 4 years ago

      Good advice here. They say that opposites attract because if there is balance then the relationship is more harmonious. Conflict is normal in any relationship. If you're not arguing, then something is definitely wrong. lol. Well, it's not what you say, but how you say it and oh don't ever go to bed without resolving your differences. voted up++++

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi billy, exactly! my husband was a martian, well I think he was! lol! even today when we meet up he always argues, I say black, he says white, I say sunshine he says rain! arghhh! lol! thanks for reading, nell

      Hi lovedoctor, yes a good argument should clear the air! but living with an opposite is darn hard work! lol! thanks for reading, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi billy, exactly! my husband was a martian, well I think he was! lol! even today when we meet up he always argues, I say black, he says white, I say sunshine he says rain! arghhh! lol! thanks for reading, nell

      Hi lovedoctor, yes a good argument should clear the air! but living with an opposite is darn hard work! lol! thanks for reading, nell

    • Scribenet profile image

      Scribenet 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I agree Nell, an opposite can be exciting and exotic even, but if the opposite has nothing in common or some very different values then it can spell disaster and heartbreak in the long term.

      I tend to think couples need to have similar moral values, ways of managing finances and definitely goals in life that are "in sync". Being friends perhaps is one of the biggest blessings a couple can have.

      That said, we can all fall in love with Martians, (unfortunately)! LOL

    • Gordon Hamilton profile image

      Gordon Hamilton 4 years ago from Wishaw, Lanarkshire, United Kingdom

      What can I say, Nell? - been there, seen it, done it. My ex and I couldn't have been more different. I suppose it was always doomed from the start, as we disagreed on almost everything - from politics, to religion, to social niceties or practices. Still, it was a life experience - to say the least! ;) The funniest thing about it is that we knew these differences existed right from day one but we thought we could surmount them. Didn't happen... :)

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Oh I think we just lose our heads over the first one that makes our heart race and if it is the wrong one then we have had it, huh? lol

      Saw a new photo of Kate today, who Yahoo insists on calling Middleton (makes me so mad!) and heard the $3000 smock she had on got sold out. I have to tell you it was the most unflattering thing I have seen her wear, or maybe it had something to do with the hat. lol Love her anyway. ^

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Nell hello girlfriend.. how are you? I love this hub.. you are so right it is best that opposites attract... sometimes I think maybe if I had a guy just like me.. but then i think no that would be too boring.. great hub ..

      blessings

      Debbie

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 4 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Yes, opposites do attract, strange but true!

      I can give you several examples including mine. What I believe, if love is foremost in a relationship, couples tend to ignore many other things.

      Thanks Nell, for this interesting and engaging hub!

    • dghbrh profile image

      deergha 4 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

      Hi Nell,

      Liked your wonderful hub. Very true indeed. Thanks for sharing. If there were no opposites in this world life would have been little colorless to know the worth of living. Death is there and so life. And every thing else goes on like this only. Some times even I feel that the extremes of opposites only gets attracted...LOL. Shared across the board and votes up interesting.

    • bac2basics profile image

      Anne 4 years ago from Spain

      Hi Nell .

      This was very thought provoking. I think in general total opposites in the end just don´t work together unless many compromises are made, and lets face it who wants to live a life not being themselves, and who wants to live with someone who constantly wants them to change. When this happens maybe the only solution is to split and either remain friends and enjoy that or part ways for good.

      By the way I saw a funny quote on an IMKarn hub just yesterday and it said " Woman are from Venus, men are from Mars, and self help books are from Uranus " ...just something to think about as this has been mentioned a lot in the comments LOL. Hope you are OK Nell and your friend too :)

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 4 years ago from San Francisco

      In many ways Arlene and I were complete opposites. Therein laid our power... thank you

    • Alecia Murphy profile image

      Alecia Murphy 4 years ago from Wilmington, North Carolina

      I think it's okay to be with someone different from you but I think some core values and beliefs can't be avoided. But you're right, that it is how hard you work at the relationship that will make you stay or go. Interesting hub.

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      Nell - What a great Hub subject. I am thankful that opposites attract. I would be so bored with someone just like me.

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 4 years ago from United States

      You are right on target again as I think opposites attract also. My husband and I are a lot different, but some how we seem to balance things out. One thing is our views on spending and saving money are the same and that can often be a bone on contention. I reeally like this hub and relate to it very well.

    • grandmapearl profile image

      Connie Smith 4 years ago from Southern Tier New York State

      Nell, truer words were never spoken: living with an opposite is darn hard work! How come it always seems as though I'm doing all the work trying to understand and find middle ground, while he keeps looking for ways to pull that ground out from under me?! LOL

      It only works well when both of you are willing to find that middle ground. Otherwise, resentment and bad feelings rise to the top and ruin everything. Voted Up+++

      ;) Pearl

    • Life of an Artist profile image

      Corinna Nicole 4 years ago from Huntsville, AL

      Being opposites in a relationship is good for balance - my strengths might be their weakness and vice versa. While my partner is used to making more money and likes to spend it freely, I'm used to not having a lot of money, so I'm good at spending our money more wisely. I hate to cook, but my partner enjoys it. I'm more health conscious than my partner, so I make sure we eat our veggies ;) That's just a few examples. But it's also VERY important that you enjoy some of the same things. We both prefer to have quiet nights in, but occasionally have urges to go out dancing, hang with friends, or enjoy events. We also work out at the same gym, even if we don't always go together.

      You don't want to be like the opposite ends of magnets that repel each other. You want to be more like oil and vinegar - they don't necessarily mix, but they sure work well together as a salad dressing! ;)

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 4 years ago from southern USA

      Dear Nell,

      What an insightful hub here. All is so very true!!! When I first met my husband, everyone would wonder why I was dating him, as if they could not believe it. hahaha We are total opposites for sure. Now, that the children are gone, it is as you say, must take time to rekindle the love before we drive each other nuts! hahaha

      Voted up +++ and sharing

      Blessings, Faith Reaper

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Faith, that's it exactly especially after the kids move out, looking at the partners make us feel as though we are living with a stranger sometimes, maybe it was the children who kept us together! lol! but working on it can help, if not well maybe they stay as friends! thanks again, nell

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      Hi, Nell..i just wrote a long blah, blah, blah comment - and when i clicked Post - it - disappeared..

      i don't know whether you have it or not - i do notice a double comment or two, yes?

      anyway, i won't rehash, but - great hub - excellent topic - difficult subject matter done beautifully!

      voting /sharing

    • Angela Blair profile image

      Angela Blair 4 years ago from Central Texas

      What an excellent Hub! Your info here is right on point -- I'm one of those person who always thought they could love someone, marry them and change their lives/ways for the better -- trust me, t'ain't true most of the time. Having quite a bit of experience in the marriage game (3) I married one who was like me and two who were opposites. Unfortunately, none worked out and I finally decided it was just wrong for me to attempt marriage again -- have, however, been with my significant other over 20 years now and we're both alike AND totally different in many ways. Who'd a thunk it? Excellent work! Best/Sis

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Artist, its great when opposites balance out, as you mentioned you hate cooking, he loves it, and so on, and I love the idea of oil and vinegar! lol! makes total sense! thanks!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Pearl, now that sounds like my ex marriage! apart from doing and saying everything opposite to me he used to drive me nuts with his laziness! lol! thanks for reading, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Pamela, thanks so much, money can be a big issue, as long as you both can handle it then its fine, in my case I tried to save, he tried to spend! lol!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi shining, lol! yes you got a point there, that's probably why I keep picking the opposite to me! thanks so much for reading, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Alecia, yes we do have to have something in common, sometimes its not obvious but its there, thanks so much for reading, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Mhatter, lol! thanks so much for reading, and I hope you are feeling better, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Anne, yes I totally agree with you, they don't really work unless one or the other gives up part of themselves, I know I did, and I love IMKarns quote! the book should just say women are from venus etc, but from now on I will add the rest! thanks for asking about my friend, she is pretty bad, but here's hoping, thanks nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi dghbrh, lol! that's so true, thanks so much for reading, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi ChitrangadaSharan, yes love is the keyword in all relationships, and hopefully it can keep people together. I have a friend who is a Christian, she goes to Church etc, and is very devout. She is married to a Muslim guy and they have been together for years! so it does work!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Deborah, fine thanks, still clicking your book! lol! I showed it to my brother the other day, he was fascinated and sent the link on to his friends girlfriend! as for a guy just like me I think we would drive each other nuts! saying that I think in my marriage it was too opposite!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Jackie, lol! yes that's so true! I only knew my husband five months before we got married! What??! as for Kate, I think its a case of trying things out when she is pregnant, and of course she has to take advice from her so called 'helpers'! sometimes they get it right, other times, well, you know! lol! thanks as always, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Gordon, lol! oh dear! sounds like mine! yes me too, I believed that love could overcome anything to do with opposite stuff, seems I was wrong too!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Scribenet, so true, friends first and love later, if only we all took notice of this wise advice, thanks, and yes that martian is still living in my block of flats! haha!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Angela, lol! seems that being the same or opposite can both be wrong! I am so glad you found your other half and are similar in some ways, not in others, seems like the happy medium is the best way to go! thanks as always, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi ImKarn, lol! those darn double comments seem to come from my pc too! no I haven't got your other comment sorry, but thanks so much for trying, and this one, I did mention you on a comment when someone said that men are from mars etc.... so I get ya! lol!

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Nell.....When I spotted your title, I could not resist. You, girl, are such an excellent and talented writer...but I'm sure I've told you that before and that you get compliments all the time. You MAY let that go to your head! LOL.

      My sweet, much-loved and recently departed hubby,"Jim," and I were, without a doubt...."OPPOSITES." We were certain that people may have considered us, the "Odd Couple," ...and especially because we were so happy together and got along famously. It seems, this type of relationship is a bit difficult for some to figure out....or comprehend.

      Suffice it to say, our opposing views on so much, was more interesting and "fun," for us...than it was any troublesome issue. Hard to explain.

      You name it, Religion, Politics, Families, personalities, music, ......the list is endless. We had our own very different and separate views.....and to make it worse, the few things we had in common were: We were both stubborn and steadfast in our personal beliefs....and each of us just knew we were RIGHT. LOL.. It did not cause argument...only healthy debate/sparring and ultimately, a lot of laughter. We did have a common sense of humor.....Thank Goodness.

      So, dear friend, for whatever this is worth, I just wanted to share my experience. Different strokes for different folks. Obviously, Jim and I had no problem being opposites, yet maintaining respect and acceptance of one another. We actually liked and appreciated each others attitudes..........Great hub, once again!...UP+++

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Paula, just wanted to say once again how sorry I am about Jim, and it sounds like you had an amazing marriage. Sometimes opposites can be perfect together especially when there is humor involved. To see the funny side even when you are debating about something is a gift, he sounded wonderful, great to see you, and thanks, nell

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 4 years ago from south Florida

      Opposites may attract but it seems to be more positive for the relationship if they are not TOO opposite. Phyllis Diller once pointed out that a couple should never go to bed mad. Instead, she said, Stay up and fight!'

    • travmaj profile image

      travmaj 4 years ago from australia

      Great hub defining that old adage - opposites attract. I don't think I 'get' love. So, Men are from Mars - women from Venus - doesn't that mean we are on different levels to begin with? I imagine it's a more difficult journey when a couple have nothing whatsoever in common. But somehow you can't fight that falling in love, june, spoon, moon attraction. When it finally wears off - watch out. And then couples with similar interests can get bored - it's well documented. Ah dear Nell - just realised - my views sound so cynical - a woman of a certain age. Ouch!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi drbj, I totally agree with you, not too opposite! and Phyllis Diller was right, lol! thanks so much as always, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi travmaj, lol! I know what you mean! I think I have got more cynical ever since I got past 40! lol! thanks so much for reading, nell

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Amen to opposites attracting. Even with friends. Sometimes it's a good thing, sometimes it's not. I believe it balances out. At least from my experiences it has. Awesome hub Nell!

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      What a very delightful read! My hubby and I are two opposite people from planet earth. I say white, he says black. I'm adventurous, he's quite laid back. I like it well done, he likes it medium rare. But hey, I'm happy to say that we're celebrating our 25th year of togetherness and craziness (with lots of bickering and fighting) this summer. :)

      I'll let him read your wonderful hub and see what he says.*smile*

      Voting up +++ pinning and passing along all the goodness of this hub.

      Love from the sky~

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Thank you, Nell....for your kindness and comfort. I'm doing OK.....like anything we face, it's one day at a time......no matter how over used that phrase may be. It's accurate......Peace.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Thanks Paula, I do understand, one day at a time is the only way we can do it sadly, you take care, hugs, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi CrisSp, lol! it sounds like a wonderful marriage! congrats on your 25th year together, and thanks so much, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Linda, that's so true, even friends can be totally opposite and get along, I know, most of mine are a bit like that! lol! thanks as always, nell

    • LupitaRonquillo profile image

      LupitaRonquillo 4 years ago

      Although my husband and I have quite a few experiences in life that are similar and have the same beliefs in family values, we are to some extent opposites. I think in order for a relationship to work, the basic fundamental values have to be agreed on.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      I totally agree Lupita, certain values have to match otherwise you wouldn't have anything in common at all, and I don't believe love can overcome that, thanks so much for reading, nell

    • shara63 profile image

      Farhat 4 years ago from Delhi

      A philosophical Hub...its very true dear, opposite attracts & their union brings wonders....like Light (day) & darkness(night) ..quite opposite but they continuously chase each other to unite & finally meet to produce a 'Day' ..No quarels, no grudges & inspite of every differences compliment each other & bring happiness together....My hubby & me like two different species by physical as well as emotional aspects ..instead, our love was above all barriers & that was sometimes envying for others ...Alas, he is no more to read all this things.... anyway, thankyou for a delightful read & taking me back to my golden days!!

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      Kathi 4 years ago from Saugatuck Michigan

      I just love the Steinbeck quote, "What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness"! That can be applied to so many things, love-hate, night-day . . . yup. My husband and I had our conflicts and looking back on it, I now realize the challenges were placed there in order for us to grow. Great article Nell . . . again!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Shara, thanks so much for reading, nell

      Hi kathi, thats so true, love gets better when it has challenges, and yes it does make us grow, thanks as always, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Shara, thanks so much for reading, nell

      Hi kathi, that's so true, love gets better when it has challenges, and yes it does make us grow, thanks as always, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Shara, thanks so much for reading, nell

      Hi kathi, that's so true, love gets better when it has challenges, and yes it does make us grow, thanks as always, nell

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      carol stanley 4 years ago from Arizona

      I am sure you knew this would bring a slew of comments...I knew it would. I married my opposite the first time but we liked to do the same things...Didn't work out..He was depressing to be around. My current is upbeat and fun and we share many things together but some away...I think we do have a good relationship..I just loved this hub and you are so tuned in.

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      Deb Hirt 4 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      This makes a lot of sense, Nell, but both parties have to want to make it work, I guess. I found out too late in my relationship that I wasn't loved. What a letdown. But that's okay. I ended up in an area that I really like living in.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Thanks carol! lol! sounds like you have a great partner! you lucky thing! lol! thanks as always, nell

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi Deb, sorry to hear that, but I am glad you live in such a lovely place, and if you didn't we wouldn't get to read about boomer lake! lol! thanks as always, nell

    • agusfanani profile image

      agusfanani 4 years ago from Indonesia

      You're right Nell, two sides being on opposite position one another makes the condition balance and I think we all were born to have to comply with the rule of opposites attract like you said. Our marriage manages to survive until now amidst our differences and similarities. Vote up this beautiful hub.

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      Mary Craig 4 years ago from New York

      "Find the middle ground"...whether you're opposites or not you still need that middle ground, a safe place to take your relationship. As always Nell, your writing is not only true but thought provoking.

      Voted up, useful, and interesting.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi agusfanani, thanks so much for reading, and I am glad you liked it, nell

      Hi mary, aw thanks so much! lol! I just tend to be one of those people who can sit back and watch people, its amazing how many opposites there are out there, and yes they do work, most of the time, but as you said we need to find the middle ground, thanks, nell

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      Mary 4 years ago from Cronulla NSW

      Absolutely do Nell!! And so agree with Billy a deep love for one another gets us through!!

      Oh & love that Steinbeck quote- it says it all..lots of votes & shared.. Cheers

    • christopheranton profile image

      Christopher Antony Meade 4 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

      Relationships always need to be worked at and one with an "opposite" needs to be worked at more than most. You have to frequently pretend to be interested when you are really bored. If you truly love the person, you can do it though.

      Great hub Nell. Voted up.

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 4 years ago from South Africa

      If selfishness is absent opposites could be happy.

      But I must say, Nell, we do reach the age where opposites no longer attract but rather repel. It is so much easier to be in a relationship with one's alter ego/ soul mate.

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      Suzette Walker 4 years ago from Taos, NM

      Great hub! It's all about balance when opposites attract. I think we do because we need what the opposite has to balance out our own personalities and vice a versa. It affords the most growth if the two people are opposites. It is balancing and not 'going out every night' or 'sitting on the couch reading every night' - You have to mix it up a bit. As couples we tend to get into routines and habits and the romance sometimes goes out the window. We forget what the original attraction was at one time. That all said, not that it is bad to be alike and enjoy the same interests - those couples can be just as successful. I enjoyed reading this hub, Nell. Great job!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Thanks guys, I love all your comments, I have been off the computer for a few days, brother in hospital overnight, long night! lol! so its great to see your views, thanks!

    • prasetio30 profile image

      prasetio30 4 years ago from malang-indonesia

      Very inspiring hub. I got new motivation after reading this hub. Love is so complicated. But, you make it very fun and I love your advice here. Like you said above, I hope I can finding romance with someone soon....amen. Nell, you have done a good job by sharing this hub with us. Voted up (useful, awesome, interesting, beautiful). Cheers....

      Big hug, Prasetio

    • Larry Fields profile image

      Larry Fields 4 years ago from Northern California

      Hi Nell. I hope that your brother is feeling better soon.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi pras, thanks so much for your awesome comment, I hope you find your love soon, and thanks!

      Hi Larry, he's much better now, thanks so much, nell

    • GClark profile image

      GClark 4 years ago from United States

      Well written and interesting article. Can definitely relate but think another thing many women have experienced is marrying someone who seemed like a soul mate and then they changed, or seemed so. What really happened is the man reverted to his true self. Some men and women either consciously or not mirror what their partner is looking for in order to attract that person and once that is accomplished they relax let down their guard.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi GClark, yes they tend to do that! lol! seriously I am sure you are right, and that's when it all goes wrong, such a shame really, because if we were all true to ourselves and them and vice versa it would be so much nicer, and the marriage would last too! thanks so much for reading, nell

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 4 years ago from USA

      I married my complete opposite and we've found ways to make it work. We are different in so many ways but share the same core values.

      I really like that Steinbeck quote, although I also like my great grandmother's favorite saying: "Ain't a pot too crooked that there ain't a lid to fit it."

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Lol! what a great saying, your grandmother knew what she was talking about! thanks so much for reading again, nell

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 3 years ago from Singapore

      My hubby and I are classic examples of opposites attracting....we come from completely different backgrounds! It works with willingness to understand and learn. Thanks for sharing, Nell.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      Hi midget, thanks so much for reading, have a great weekend! nell

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 3 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Happy June 18th Birthday Nell Rose!!!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      Thanks Linda! Lol! just a few days it it will be your birthday too!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      Thanks Linda! Lol! just a few days it it will be your birthday too!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 3 years ago from Orlando, FL

      June birthdays are the BEST! :)

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      Lol! yep, we Gemini's need to stick together!

    • starbright profile image

      Lucy Jones 3 years ago from Scandinavia

      Isn't love grand. Nice hub Nell.

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 3 years ago

      My hubby and have lots of differences, but we have adapted over the past 41years. Opposites keep you challenged and balanced. Loved your thoughts on this one. Happy Birthday!!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      Thanks starbright, yes it certainly is! lol!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 3 years ago from England

      Thanks teaches, yes opposites can definitely work, especially after all those years together, thanks so much for the birthday wish!

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 19 months ago from New Delhi, India

      Came back to read this interesting and engaging hub and also shared it on HH!

      Thank you!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 19 months ago from England

      Thanks for the share and read again Chitrangada, hope you are having a great day!

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 19 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Great hub Nell, my wife and I are opposites in a lot of ways but seem to have just enough things in common to make it work. It's not always easy, but you need to find the common ground and work on that.

    • Vellur profile image

      Nithya Venkat 19 months ago from Dubai

      Interesting hub! It is true opposites attract and as you say the things that we used to find fascinating may become annoying as we go on in life. We just have to resolve differences and move on.

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 19 months ago from England

      That's so true John, but sometimes its too far apart to meet in the middle, shouldn't be allowed! LOLO!

    • Nell Rose profile image
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      Nell Rose 19 months ago from England

      HI Vellur, yes that's the truth, it is good to have different hobbies but come together with family at other times, thanks for reading, nell

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