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First date mistakes men make: Things guys should not do on a first date

Updated on October 25, 2013

What are the common mistakes men make on first dates? From simple mistakes like avoiding eye contact and not making conversations to dreaded ones like looking at other women and ogling at the wrong places - this post discusses some of the things that guys should not do on their first dates. Read on and you will realize that just being a normal fun guy is more than enough to impress a girl on your first date.

Don't be a jerk. Tone down your macho side else you will scare your date away.
Don't be a jerk. Tone down your macho side else you will scare your date away. | Source

1) Being too macho: Excessive display of manliness and ego

Acting too macho is a common mistake that guys make on a first date. Girls get turned off when guys act all weird by displaying excessive levels of aggression and ego.

Whether you have the personality of an alpha male or a shy geek, play it cool and don't try too hard to look like a tough guy. You are dating a girl, not a wrestler who will pin you down if you look weak.

2) Staring like a pervert: Looking at the wrong places

Guys look like perverts when they keep staring down a girl's chest or other places which are inappropriate to gaze at unless they are a couple.

The most considerate woman may take it as a compliment if you steal an admiring glance at her figure. But staring inappropriately will make you look like a weirdo and a pervert.

3) Behaving like a cheap guy on the first date

You will make a pathetic first impression if a girls senses that you are being cheap on the first date. Don't make the mistake of saving a few dollars here and there by trying to cajole your date into ordering cheaper items.

An easy way to avoid overspending is to choose the place of your date wisely. If you can only afford to foot the bill for a couple of cappuccinos, go to a cafe and not an expensive diner.

Your date will get bored if you don't make interesting conversation with her.
Your date will get bored if you don't make interesting conversation with her.

4) Not asking women the right questions: Inability to make conversation

It is a misconception that the best first dates have to be those in which you do something really exciting. From a woman's perspective, great first dates are those in which she has amazing conversations with the guy.

Avoid being a big bore on yours by polishing up your first date conversation skills. Even the most casual date at Starbucks can turn into the most romantic first date ever, if you can manage to hold up a lovely conversation.

5) Looking at other women during the date: Rude mistake of checking out other girls

Checking out other girls while you are your first date will instantly earn you the ire of your date. This is completely unacceptable and it is probably the worst mistake a guy can make on a first date.

If you manage to keep a poker face and continue looking into your date's eyes without batting an eyelid even when a drop dead gorgeous woman walks past, you will immediately secure yourself a second date if there are no other red flags raised.

6) Arrogant display of wealth: Excessively flaunting money

A display of wealth can be impressive if it is done tastefully. However excessive flaunting of money to the extent that it looks arrogant, is generally a turn off.

There is nothing wrong in showing off your riches. But an excessive display of wealth and bling on the first date with a woman whose is intellectually driven can make you look snobbish.

Wear something nice and decent - first dates are all about making good first impressions.
Wear something nice and decent - first dates are all about making good first impressions.

7) Weird choice of clothes: Making a bad first impression

There are no fixed rules which dictate what guys should wear on first dates. But a general rule of thumb states that as long as you turn up in something nice and something that's not weird, you are safe.

If your first date is more casual like a coffee date, wear a nice t-shirt or a shirt over jeans. If you have planned a more formal affair like an elaborate dinner, something more formal along the lines of a jacket, shirt and trouser combination may be more appropriate.

8) Not giving her a compliment

Not all men are born charmers, and women understand that. But a girl expects that she will get at least one compliment from her guy on the first date.

Don't stress yourself out if you can't think of anything specific to say. Even the most simplest of compliments will bring a smile on your date's face. Here are some ideas to make it easy for you.

  • You are prettier than the pictures in your online dating profile
  • Hey, you're looking good
  • Your friend didn't tell me she was setting me up with someone so gorgeous

9) Expressing extreme religious views

Don't make the mistake of expressing extreme religious views on your first date. Unless you have hooked up with a girl from a religious dating website catering to specific groups, talking about religion is a no-no on the first date.

So what should you do if your date asks you about your religious views? The answer is quite simple. Don't keep mum but don't rant about it either.

Make sure that you pick up the check on your first date.
Make sure that you pick up the check on your first date.

10) Not picking up the check: Making the mistake of letting a woman pay

Never make the mistake of letting a girl foot the bill on your first date. No matter how badly she insists on going dutch, never agree.

A basic sense of chivalry dictates that the guy will pick up the check on the first date. Follow this rule and always be a gentleman by paying for everything you eat and every little activity that you do.

11) Pushing the boundaries with flirting: Coming on too quick too soon

A girl will probably be disappointed if there is no spark and no flirting on the first date. But on the other hand, she doesn't expect a guy to come on too soon and too heavily either.

Avoid making a blunder by limiting your flirting to winks and charming lines. Don't talk about sex and don't get too touchy feely.

12) Getting drunk and doing something really obnoxious

First dates go horribly wrong when too many drinks make guys do stupid things. From fights to vulgar comments, drunken mishaps have the potential of causing major embarrassment along with ruining any chances for a second date.

Avoid getting tipsy so that you can focus all your attention to impress her and worry less about doing something embarrassing.

Don't look away and don't be aloof. Gaze into your date's eyes so that you can make a connection with her.
Don't look away and don't be aloof. Gaze into your date's eyes so that you can make a connection with her.

13) Not making eye contact while talking

Women find it disappointing when men don't make eye contact on a date. Gazing into her eyes when she speaks is the least a girl expects from a guy on the first date.

Apart from being a sign of confidence, looking into her eye is also a sign that you are giving her your full attention. It will be all the more romantic if you keep staring into a girl's eyes even when she is not speaking.

14) Being excessively nervous on the first date

Being excessively nervous is possibly one of the most common mistakes that guys make on first dates. Women are anything but impressed when a man is nervous to the point where he starts getting fidgety and anxious.

Remember that nervousness is not the same as having a shy personality. There is nothing wrong in being a shy guy and if you are on a date with a girl who is shy too, it is likely that you both will share a good chemistry.


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    • Alphadogg16 profile image

      Kevin W 

      7 years ago from Texas

      Your hubs are always very interesting princesswithapen. Most of these things would be done by a young, immature guy/boy or a man with self esteem issues/mid life crisis, or at least you would think. They come across to me as common sense. Thumbs up on your hub.


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