ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How To Start An Open Relationship

Updated on October 13, 2009

An open relationship can be an excellent way to expand your horizons. You'll met new people, forge new relationships, deepen bonds, and increase your immunity to a whole range of new diseases. It's pretty exciting, and those are just some of the reasons that more and more people are turning to open relationships.

There is still a great deal of resistance out there however. Many people still believe that monogamy is the ideal, and that open relationships are simply excuses for people who cannot get their sexual impulses under control to sleep around whilst still enjoying the benefits of a committed relationship. They claim that one should not have one's cake and eat it too. But they're wrong. The obesity epidemic alone proves that much. Around the world, people are having their cake, eating it, and going back for seconds. Sure, there are some downsides like hear disease, diabetes, and the misery of obesity, but nothing is perfect.

Here's how to convince your old stick in the mud partner that you should be in an open relationship.

Point out the positives. In an open relationship, both your needs will be perpetually fulfilled. You will be floating in a permanent haze of satiated sexuality as your extra lovers feed you grapes, clean out the cat's litter box, and make sure your children are dressed for school. Jealousy will not be an issue, as you will both be totally secure in your never ending love for one another.

If you're married, remember that which God hath joined, dare no man tear asunder. Ignore the divorce statistics, they probably did the marriage ceremony wrong in those cases. You have to say the words just right for the magical charms to work.

If else fails, try some cliches. A cliché is an excellent way of justifying something that otherwise seems completely asinine. Feel free to amend them to suit your purposes, they're cliches, not commandments.

Variety is the spice of life! Two birds in the bush are awesome! Many hands make light work! Any 'friend' of yours is a 'friend' of mine! (Do the air quotes in the air with your fingers when you say that one, people LOVE air quotes) All's fair in love and war!

The exclamation marks are essential, make sure you say these enthusiastically and with conviction. If it helps, imagine you're a used car salesman trying to flog off an import with a wound back speedometer and rabid rats living in the engine.

The important thing to remember is that anything worth having is worth fighting for, and nothing is going to make your relationship sweeter than night after night spent fighting over the issue of extra sexual partners.

Good luck!


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Levertis Steele profile image

      Levertis Steele 

      5 years ago from Southern Clime

      This sounds like a suicide dive to me! Of course, you are being sarcastic, aren't you?

    • zduckman profile image


      7 years ago

      Hmmm Jealousy not an issue...not sure about that one. What happens when your partner has a date with his/her lover, and you are home alone with a pint of Ben and Jerry's???


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)