ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Single White Female Seeks.....

Updated on October 19, 2019
SpottedCafe profile image

I attend the University of The Living. All my education comes from first-hand experience's life throws my way.

My Have To Have Someone, Stopped A Long Time Ago.

When my partner to be arrives, it will not be by anything but sure blessings.
When my partner to be arrives, it will not be by anything but sure blessings.

Embracing My Inner Humor

Once Was on A Dating Site
Having once joined a dating site, I met a few crazies. One proclaimed he had a brand new ax in his car before we even made it up to the bowling alley door, while another drank like a fish.

It was not a hard decision to remove myself from the fishing pool. Any desperation from within to be with someone was not strong enough to place me into the oncoming path of psycho's. But now near four years after the ending of a ruptured 31-year marriage, plus a failed two year on and off-again relationship, the humor of rewording what I want floats through my mind.

Expectations Are Not Too High
Someone once stated my expectations are too high for what I want in a relationship. That if they were not lowered, the best time of my life could be passing me up. Thing is, I am not out for "a good time". I am out for the last love of my life. The one who knows I am worthy of their partnership.

He Was Not Sure When
Having been told once that he knew it would work for us, but was "not sure when" (and that is a direct quote), is when I realized my worth to him might mean something but it was not enough for right now. The want to be "tied down" (not a direct quote) was not in his near future. And with that, all things came to an end.

My Time is Precious
Some have no issues with wasting time dating. I still believe, at least for me, it is the dumbest form of having fun. This is why I choose to wait until paths cross naturally. No way will love be forced by me, or the hopes of it. Why waste my time, only to waste it more? There are things in this life I want to do verses that.

Love...I Hope

Single White Female Ad

If I Wrote An Ad
Knowing for sure what life is about for me as an older, single woman, this is the type of ad I would write. (Below) Surely, it will gain me no followers, let alone love, but instead, respect to know that I am worthy of only the best in my life, and this is what it would say ....

____________________________________________________________

Dear Share A Future With Me,

Our lives are precious. We both deserve to continue to be who we are as a person. No one changing to please the other, while forgetting us. Dedication is beautiful when it comes naturally but when it has to be forced or placed on a back burner for other people, then we need to reconsider talking altogether.
Dedication is about making sure we work together. Even when apart. To help bring out only the best of each other. To ensure our safety is a top priority, without being a lifetime watchdog with every step. Dedication is also about promises we made to each other, to see us through all the hiccups the world will throw our way.
The world is a nasty place for couples. Outside influences are always full of thoughts, opinions, and forced ways to see you single again. Keeping others at bay is a requirement. If we need someone to talk to, then we have to make sure the person we choose, will only have our best interest at heart as a couple. Not some person who would love to see us fail. Together is a couple. Separated is not.
We will have disagreements. We will become upset. But is there any reason for screaming, throwing things across the house, hitting, biting, or degrading the other with foul names such as "bitty" and "butthole"? Seeing all those as abuse, there is no room in my life for that. I ran from it before. If even the slightest red flag in this direction appears, I am not scared. It ends on the spot.
My family belongs to me. Yours belongs to you. We do not have to like either side but we must respect them. To also stand up to anyone in the bloodline who speaks ill on one of us. If we know they are telling the truth, then you need to bring it to each other. So we can work on it. As a real couple. Until our family receives a degree in gives a crap about us, they are against us. Know this. Embrace it. Love them still. But love us more for who we are as a strong, willed duo.
Work is important to me. A woman I may be but a damsel in distress who loves to stay home and wash after your dirty laundry I am not. Washing your laundry and cooking is a different topic altogether, but staying home to do it because you have issues with a woman in the workforce, we are already over before we start. Please find someone else to control.
Smoking. Dipping. Dope. Drinking. These are unacceptable area's in my life and have no party time to entertain anyone who is excessive or shows the possibilities of doing so. This is not an option, nor a choice. No matter how we feel, even if it happens ten years into the relationship, we are done.
Our home. Our bills. Together we make them, together we pay them. My truck. Your car. We started them before us. We can finish them alone. But as a strong couple, recognizing when one of us is struggling, we will chime in. No means no. No reason for repeating it if we are certain people.
Being a woman of strong self-esteem, I need the same in a partner. One who knows they are worthy of all that I am speaking about here. Plus a strong love life, which I have not mentioned until now.
Emotionally needy is not a bad thing if it is controlled properly with amazing love and attention. I love to give, just as much as I love to receive. It is a top priority right after trust, communication, honesty, and having the self-worth to appreciate your appearance out in public, as well as alone.
There is more like a good sense of humor but at some point, this needs to come to an end. And with that ... I am looking not for perfection, but the one who gets what I am saying.

Sincerely,
A True Write Up



Is Love Alive??

Have you ever joined a dating site? How did that work out for you?

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      8 weeks ago

      Online dating sites/apps are nothing more than a (tool) for meeting new people. Much like a fork is a tool for eating. You can have a garden salad or a slice of double fudge cake. However no obese person would ever blame their weight gain on their fork! And yet people who have bad dating experiences with online dating sites will blame the whole online dating industry for the people (they) chose to engage with!

      Secondly whatever someone is looking for should dictate where they shop. Too often people act as if all online dating sites are the same.

      They don't invest any time doing research or reading reviews before selecting a site to join. There is all kinds of information one can gleam such as woman to man ratio, age of average member, educational and income level.

      Naturally any "free site" is going to have tons of rift raft to sort through. One of the best things a person can do is imagine them self being their "ideal mate" and choose which site/app (he/she) would likely join.

      Don't expect your profile or ad to do all of your mate screening. Like it or not one has to invest a certain amount of time getting to know someone's "authentic self". A common mistake a lot of (women) make in particular is claiming they're ready to settle down or get married.

      If you don't already have a boyfriend/girlfriend you are in love with you are NOT ready to get married! It is the "special person" you are already with that should be the reason why you're having thoughts of marriage. Otherwise you're just someone chasing after a marital status in search of a "prop". Once again it takes time to determine if they're "the one".

      A lot of people actually HATE the whole (getting to know you) dating process. They want to "fast forward" to being in a committed relationship. This leads to making a lot of mistakes because they allow themselves to become emotionally invested in someone they barely know. Online daters in particular should keep their options open!

      If you were looking for a job you wouldn't send your resume to one company and wait around to see if they hired you before submitting your resume to another company. Both the job candidate and the company would conduct (multiple) interviews in their search to find the right match.

      Last but not least dating is supposed to be a FUN social activity. One of the reasons so many people have a lot of "first dates" with no second date is because they don't know how to relax and have fun on a first date!

      Asking interrogation style questions, coming off too serious or standoffish isn't likely going to lead to a date where both people walk away feeling like they can't wait to see each other again.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)