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How To Get Over A Relationship

Updated on January 27, 2017
word55 profile image

Author of (Love Is Our Law) poetry book, songwriter, firefighter, real estate broker, College Instructor. 3 songs released. Yet to marry.


First Things First

It doesn’t matter why you need to get over it but the fact is, you need to get over it and move on. Right? Well, I’m going to try to leave the spirituality part out of it because, some people cannot or refuse to equate the spirit with getting over it and moving on. Just so you know, you will not move on as long as you allow your mind and feelings to torcher you about the things that you used to do in the affair.

The 7 Most Important Things

  • It is important to start thinking positive, always.
  • Do positive things like exercising daily.
  • Keeping you looking attractive always, in public.
  • Have faith that someone better is for you.
  • Be comfortable with who you are.
  • Do not change for anyone and
  • Become a prayer warrior.

Seven Things That Must Take Place

Let’s recognize seven things that we must do immediately and from now on. These seven things shall take you where you ought to be. Like The Temptations sang, “Don’t Look Back.”It is important to start thinking positive about yourself, always. Pray every day to the Lord and that He guides you to where you need to go according to His Will and not your own, When we do things on our own it easier to do things that are not in our best interest. We may realize and pay the cost for it later, unfortunately.


As You Move On

As you move on you may indulge in more affairs and relationships but that’s how you gain experience and learn from and about various personalities. Everybody does not react the same way to the goodness and qualities that you may possess and present. One person may appreciate the love you offer and another may take it for granted. You must recognize these things daily. It is important to pay attention to someone that you are involved with. The moment that you are disrespected by your companion is when you need to rectify being disrespected and ascertain that it shall not happen again, regardless of who they are or how you feel about the person because in the long run it can become hurtful. Being disrespected adds up to more disrespect later.


To Avoid The Pain

To be sharp and notice how well you are fitted in a relationship, you should maintain a clear mind and be sober. A person will respect you for the strong stand of who you are. You should always be aware and in control of yourself so that you are never taken advantage of. If you have been hurt then that means you have been too vulnerable and did not see the hurt coming and you have allowed your feelings to go further than they should. You should monitor the situation to be sure that the feeling for each other is as mutual as “I feel the same way too.”


Detach the Emotions From the Relationship

When trying to get over a relationship the emotions must be totally detached from it. It is important to see why it did not work and why it would not have worked in the long run. It is important not to jump into a new relationship until after you have gotten over your most recent relationship by whatever means possible. Do not dwell on memories of it. Free your mind from them.

It is okay and important to look ahead to a new relationship with intensions to bond with your companion through being honest and trusting to begin with. It is a process to go through very slowly and for beneficial reasons. It should start out to be very platonic. Allow your spirit to guide you, It will keep you from making mistakes that you may have made before. You do not want to make the same mistakes over again. It is because we follow the desires of the heart and the flesh that causes mistakes to be made in the first place.

Become Free From All Hindrances

In closing here, the best spirit to follow is the Spirit of God, The Master Protector of all human mankind and if followed consistently then you will never hurt again from

the wiles of being in a relationship. Is not that a wonderful thing? So many people find it too difficult to survive or get over such catastrophe and they suffer in many ways. They lose confidence in themselves. They turn to drugs and other bad habits to try to escape or cover up the pain but eventually, the must deal with the pain. Well, I assure that this is the best way to deal with it. Keep the self-esteem up and be a warrior against falling into depression and other negative connotations. I plan to do a hub on How to Avoid Having a Bad Relationship or Affair.

The Perfect Relationship

The perfect relationship starts with having a relationship with God. God created all of us with His perfection. We must be perfect in mind and that means following God's commandments. They are for our benefit like following the path to a destination. We don't know how to get there unless we follow a map. Well, finding love is the same way. There is a certain path to follow to get there and stay if we so, desire to. Only God can guide us to what's best for us. We shouldn't continue to find love or perfect love on our own. We must eventually pay homage to God our preternatural, wonderful and supernatural Creator.

Don't Look Back


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    • word55 profile image

      Word 2 years ago from Chicago

      Thanks for that comment Fahim. It's better to listen until you get the opportunity to speak in a conversation.

    • word55 profile image

      Word 2 years ago from Chicago

      Hi dashingscorpio, your observations about two people splitting up are what needs to be understood. I bet you can write a book on it.

    • word55 profile image

      Word 2 years ago from Chicago

      Hi DDE where have you been, I appreciate your comment here about a couple breaking up.

    • profile image

      Fahim 3 years ago

      It's a natural human tndenecy to interrupt. Make an effort to be patient and let the other person finish the sentence. When you don't let the other person speak, they tend to get frustrated.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 3 years ago

      Voted up and useful!

      One of the main things I would say most people need to do is first of all forgive themselves for choosing the "wrong mate" for themselves.

      Use whatever lessons you learned from that experience to help you make a better choice the next time around.

      If this person hurt you decide to forgive them. It does not mean you have to be in contact with them. Forgiveness means "letting go". You are no longer going to allow what they did or said to occupy your mind.

      Lastly I would add it's important to keep things in perspective. When it comes to love and relationships most of us (fail our way to success). If this were not true we'd all be married to our high school sweethearts!

      In order for your (ex) to have been "the one" they would have had to see you as being "the one". At the very least a "soul-mate" is someone who actually (wants to be with) you! (And vice versa). Therefore if you split up they weren't the one! Stop romanticizing the past! Every ending is a new beginning!

      Your future lies ahead of you and not behind you!

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 3 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Sound advice here. Getting over a break up can be most painful if you were really involved with each other.