How To Revive A Lost Friendship

Long lost friendships happen over time. You grow up, move away, get married, start a family, make career moves…before you realize it, you have lost touch with many of your close friends.

Reviving those lost friendships can be a tough thing to do. Sometimes people change, and the friends you once were close to may not want to have a friendship with you anymore. Sometimes though, you’ll find that one of those long, lost friends was really a true friend, and will be thrilled to be friends with you again.

Here are some tips you can use to help revive lost friendships:

MAKE A PHONE CALL. Sometimes the most difficult part of reviving lost friendships is simply finding that person again. If it’s been a long time since you seen or heard from that person, they may not live in the same area. If you call their old number but can’t reach them, make some phone calls to other people who might could give you some information on how to reach your old friend.

INVITE THEM TO LUNCH. One of the easiest ways to revive an old friendship is over a nice friendly lunch. A public social setting is often on the best ways to create a relaxed, no-strings environment. You’ll both feel more at ease and more open to catching up on each other’s lives.

PLAN A PLAY DATE. If you both have children, plan a play date with your kids. Do something fun outside the house (visit the zoo, picnic in the park). Rather than just sitting and looking at each other and running out of things to say, you’ll all be active and busy.

BE UNDERSTANDING. Sometimes it’s just not possible to revive an old friendship. There may be hurt feelings or too much water under the bridge for you to become good friends again. Or that person could be going through something in their own life that prevents them from re-forming that friendship with you again. Above all, be patient and understanding if things don’t go the way you expect them to.

From personal experience, many times those old friendships rarely can be revived. When I graduated high school I moved two states away. For the first few years, I stayed in touch with a lot of my high school friends. After a while though, they all got married, moved, and eventually, we all lost touch with each other.

Twelve years later I moved back to my hometown. I’ve been here for two years and still haven’t been able to revive any of my old friendships. We see each other now and then and say hello to each other, but the close friendship we once shared is gone.

If you want to revive an old friendship, by all means, go for it. You never know if you can be friends again if you don’t try. Just remember not to place too many expectations on your old friends, just in case that person doesn’t want to be friends with you anymore.