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How to Fix a Relationship with a Cheating Spouse, Husband, or Boyfriend

Updated on February 5, 2013

Is Your Boyfriend Cheating?

Cheating Boyfriend or Cheating Husband?
Cheating Boyfriend or Cheating Husband?

Why is Your Boyfriend Cheating?

In order to deal with a cheating boyfriend, cheating husband, or cheating spouse, you have to understand why they are cheating.

You might think that it is just a sexual issue, but there are many reasons why cheating happens.

Cheating does not necessarily mean that they are a bad person, though it may be that they are just a jerk.

Cheating is often caused by an emotional need not being met - or other issues between you that are manifesting as cheating, rather than a purely sexual issue.

9 Reasons He Might be Cheating

Here are some common reasons for cheating (in no particular order)

  1. Not feeling appreciated
  2. Lack of sexual satisfaction from specific turn-ons
  3. Not enough or infrequent sex
  4. Need to feel that they are still attractive
  5. Need to feel in control
  6. Needs more affection or attention
  7. Repressed anger toward the partner
  8. Revenge for real or imagined slights
  9. An opportunity they can't resist

What Can You Do to Make Them Happier in the Relationship?

When you have a cheating boyfriend, a cheating husband, or cheating spouse, you have to ask yourself what you can do to make them happier in the relationship...

...and then decide if that is something you want to do, are willing to do, and if they are willing to work with you to fix things.

No matter if it is emotional, physical, or control issues that are causing the problem, counseling is one way to identify and work through the issue.

Time to Dump the Cheating Spouse?

No matter what the issue might be that is behind the cheating, the cheater may not be willing to work with you to fix things.

They may resist going to counseling, try to put all the blame on you, or refuse to acknowledge there is a problem

In those situations, it may be better to move on and find someone who is willing to work through the inevitable issues that arise in a relationship.

And, in many cases, being willing to walk away will make them realize how important the realtionship is to them - and that alone may solve the problem of a cheating boyfriend.

What Have You Done to Fix a Cheating Boyfriend?

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    • profile image

      MEGGAR 3 years ago



    • profile image

      trudy 3 years ago

      my husband cheated on me and we broke up for some time then i got back with him and he told me he had gotten three women and all got pregnant with his kids. i accepted all that but what hurts me, he still continies to see these women and their children , blems me for what happened and plays the caring father to those childern. he often stays out for long , giving many exeses and not only shows that he cares about the women and their children,but he is not ready to let go. i thought he wanted us to work things out but later confessed that he wanted me to be in the know so that he is free . i have two lovely childern and every one blems me for having gone back to this marriage. to top it up the guy is not working and the little money he makes shares it among us. i am very hurt and don't know what to do next.advise

    • profile image

      anitha 6 years ago

      i luved him for one year,he too,he is in other place,me in one ,we went to outing then after 2 weeks he didn't cal me,he texted me my mom is against,i waited for him for 11/2 year ,he came frm abroad then i came to knw he had a relation wit a gal in his teammate,i was shocked,he said after seeing tat gal in office he dnt like me,she is better than her,i luve her than u

    • LisaKoski profile image

      Lisa 6 years ago from WA

      My boyfriend cheated on me and I tried walking away but I've always ended up coming back. A lot of times, even though it's been a year now since it happened, I question that decision but overall our relationship has been much better since it happened. It was the worst thing for him to do but in the end all our problems were aired out and finally addressed instead of just hidden or ignored.

      In our case, he cheated on me with an ex he couldn't get over...then again with a coworker because, during the period of time after his first act of infidelity, I was a wreck and he wanted a girl who wasn't so full of drama.

      Cheating is the most selfish act and for those cheaters out there I want them to realize that cheating doesn't fix things, it only destroys or ruins them and the damage it does can never heal. The fact that your relationship has problems or you aren't getting enough sex isn't an excuse. It's better to leave a problem relationship or just address it than torture your partner more by sleeping around behind their back.

    • profile image

      megan 7 years ago

      I'm the cheater in the relationship. I'm not sure why I do it we have a very good relationship. We have sex every night. He's stepped in and became a dad to my son. If someone has a answer answer please help me.

    • dawnM profile image

      Dawn Michael 7 years ago from THOUSAND OAKS

      I would have to say for sure don't even try to work on a relationship where the person is not a spouse, that is what dating is for, not to marry that type of person. If you did marry a perfectly nice man and he cheats then it is time to look at the entire relationship and see a professional, if he stopped the cheating. It is a hard call in a marriage and the cheater should have stood up to his wife first and demanded that they get help. for the nice men out there where your wife is giving no love or attention, stand up to her don't cheat, because you end of being the bad person in the relationship.

      Great article and I agree with what you wrote.