- Gender and Relationships
How to Get People to Help You When You Need It
A bad situation I found myself in
Years ago I was driving down a very busy street when my vehicle stalled and broke down right at the intersection. It was an embarrassing situation. So many cars were behind me honking their horns wanting me to go when the light turned green but I just couldn't get the thing to start.
So of course I turned on my hazard lights so that people could see my problem and hopefully get out of their cars and offer to help me push the vehicle out of the intersection. When I turned them on people realized I was broke down alright. But they didn't get out and offer to help me at all they just drove around me and continued on their way. This went on for the better part of an hour. Me sitting there at the busy intersection helpless while everyone drove around me. Not one person even glanced over at me as they passed with a sympathetic eye.
Finally I realized no stranger was going to help me so I called a family member. My cousin who is also a very good friend and skilled in auto mechanics. I told him my situation and asked if he could come help me fix it. He said he'd be right there but I needed to push my vehicle out of the intersection right now.
Thanks captain obvious! LOL I told him that I already knew this but no one was offering to help me! What I haven't mentioned yet about this vehicle is that it was an 80's Jeep Grand Wagoneer. If you don't know what that is it's a very big and bulky Jeep which is more like an older style SUV than a jeep. There was no way I could get out and push it by myself while having one hand on the steering wheel to guide it.
My cousin asked me if I had even tried to push it by myself. I said "of course not!" I felt like he was being ridiculous. Obviously I could never move such a vehicle on my own. My cousin laughed and said, "that's why no one is offering to help you." He went on to promise me that if I got out and started to try the vehicle would easily move after a few seconds. Not because it was possible for me to move it by myself. Rather because people would see what I was trying to do and get out of their cars and help me.
Well I took his advice and got out of my Grand Wagoneer and proceeded to try to do the impossible. Sure enough the thing would not move an inch at first. Then suddenly as if I had been granted the strength of Samson the thing started gliding in the direction I was pushing it. I turned around and looked back to see 5 men behind and beside the vehicle pushing and working with me.
People help those who help themselves
Since that time I've learned that my cousins valuable advice applies to just about anything you're trying to accomplish. No matter how impossible it is for something to be done by yourself. No one will help you do it until they see you at least trying to do it by yourself.
People will not do the things you want to accomplish for you. Many people love to help someone accomplish their dreams though.
Don't wait for people to help you do anything, just get out of the vehicle and start pushing all by yourself. People will come along side you before you know it.