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How to be your boyfriend's best friend: Ways to be his girlfriend and his friend

Updated on January 10, 2014

How to be your boyfriend's best friend? A guy's equation with his mates is different than that with his girlfriend. It is not easy to be a girl who can be a girlfriend and also be a buddy when required. However if you feel that being able to connect with your boyfriend as a friend and as a lover will benefit your relationship, here are tips that will help you along the way.


Hang out with him like a buddy, not like a girlfriend who nags him by saying 'let's do something fun'
Hang out with him like a buddy, not like a girlfriend who nags him by saying 'let's do something fun' | Source

1) Don't nag him with 'let's do something' when you are hanging out

Guys may not show it but they cringe from inside when their girlfriends say 'let's do something'. For a guy, hanging out together itself is as good as 'doing something' and it doesn't necessarily have to go beyond that every time.


So unless you want to sound like a girlfriend who nags a lot, avoid pestering your boyfriend with your demands to 'do something' when you are hanging out together. If you feel like spicing up your dates, plan something in advance rather than moan about how boring it is when you are actually on a date.


2) Don't take him shopping with you

It is one thing to spend more time with your boyfriend but taking him shopping with you is really not the best way to do it. Guys don't necessarily like waiting on you while you try tens of different outfits and hop from shop to shop.


Take your girlfriends along when you go shopping. Don't force your boyfriend to join you. He will be put off by the thought of being bored to death while you window shop and try new clothes.


3) Have a quiet beer with him

You may love to share a few romantic glasses of wine with your boyfriend but that doesn't cut it if you want to be his friend. After all that is said and done, there are fewer things that men like more than to unwind and grab a beer with their mates.


Be your boyfriend's mate by sharing with him a mug of his favorite brew. This doesn't need to be a date per se. Just be relaxed and hang out with him as if you were one of his pals.


Challenge your boyfriend to a game. Guys love being challenged and just the fun of battling it out on the court will be awesome.
Challenge your boyfriend to a game. Guys love being challenged and just the fun of battling it out on the court will be awesome.

4) Challenge your boyfriend

Guys love challenges and you can become your boyfriend's friend by giving him cute challenges from time to time. Think about the things that he would usually do with his mates. A perfect example is to challenge your boyfriend to shoot some hoops in the backyard.


Whether it is shooting hoops, playing tennis or playing backyard soccer, it doesn't matter whether you are as good as him. What matters more is the fun you will have while doing something that he loves. Just make sure that you don't win – even by accident. You will bruise your boyfriend's ego if you beat him.


5) Share a hobby

The easiest way to become your boyfriend's best friend is to share a hobby with him. Apart from the obvious benefit of being able to spend more time with him, you will also get to know a side of him that you never saw before.


Suppose your boyfriend is taking classes to learn how to play the guitar. Join in and become a core part of his life. Going to classes together, sharing tips and jamming together will allow you to bond on a much deeper level than just boyfriend and girlfriend. You will become friends and soul mates too.


6) Gossip with your boyfriend

A sweet way to connect with your boyfriend beyond your usual talks is to share gossip with him. Pull him into your world of gossip by starting off with something that he is interested in listening to – for example, share some gossip with him about his best friend's girlfriend.


Slowly initiate your boyfriend into the addictive world of gossip. As time goes by he will look forward to your late night chats.


Become his buddy by watching sports together.
Become his buddy by watching sports together.

7) Watch sports with your boyfriend

Most guys love sports even if they don't play themselves. Guys usually don't expect their girlfriends to be passionate about sports but if you can take a step towards that direction by watching the game with him, you will be on your way to become his best bud.


Get him to initiate you into a sport by explaining the rules and the lingo. Once you wrap your head around why a bunch grown up men keep running around a ball, your boyfriend will never need to call his best friends over to watch the Friday night game.


8) Go on casual dates more often

The trick to making your boyfriend really enjoy your company as a mate is to give your dates a casual vibe. Save your best dresses, plunging tops and high heels for those special romantic dates. For all the other ones, slip into skinny jeans paired with a t-shirt and flip-flops.


Keeping your dates casual will make your boyfriend feel totally at ease. He won't feel the pressure of dressing to impress all the time and he will feel relaxed. This is exactly how he would want to feel when he is hanging out with his friends.


9) Avoid giving him opinions about what he should wear

Guys generally hate it when wardrobes become too complicated. Apart from the modern metrosexuals, all men are probably not as evolved as women when it comes to fashion and style. They don't like getting fashion advice from their girlfriends.


Your boyfriend will never expect his friends to give opinions about styles or talk about the latest in men's fashion. So if you want to be his friend, you must try to avoid doing it.


Become your boyfriend's friend by becoming his gaming buddy.
Become your boyfriend's friend by becoming his gaming buddy.

10) Play video games with him

It is not uncommon for girlfriends to feel ignored when their boyfriends run off to play video games with their friends. If you can relate to this, the easiest way to get your boyfriend's attention is to become his gaming buddy.


Initiate yourself into the world of gaming by getting your boyfriend to give you tips and lessons. Once he sees that he doesn't need to scurry over to his mate's place to race or to level up, he will start spending a lot of time with you, his newfound gaming partner.


11) Avoid reading between the lines

Guys often claim that they don't like it when girls read between the lines but whether they practice this principle themselves is highly debatable. Assuming that they don't, guys will heave a sigh of relief when their girlfriends stop reading between the lines and take everything they say at face value.


Try to avoid picking out hidden meanings when you have conversations with your boyfriend. Straight talks is what he is used to having with his mates and you can be one of them if he shares the same vibe with you too.


12) Go with him when he shops for something that he loves

It is a myth that guys hate shopping. The fact is that they love to shop, but only for the stuff that is in their interest domain.


Whether it is for gadgets or for sports gear, tag along when your boyfriend goes to shop for his favorite things. Do this a couple of times and he will get into the habit of getting you to go along every time he shops. He will no longer need to call his mates to give him company.


Notice how his friends behave with him and try to imitate that behavior from time to time.
Notice how his friends behave with him and try to imitate that behavior from time to time.

13) Behave like his buddy

It will be hard to understand how you need to behave if you want to become your boyfriend's friend just by reading a few tips. Instead, learn it the real way by observing how his buddies behave with him. From the way he fist bumps to the banter, you will know exactly how you need to behave to make him feel at ease with you.


Don't overdo this because at the end of the day, you still want to be the pretty girl who he considers to be someone more special that just a friend.


14) Allow him to say anything without being judgmental

Your boyfriend will never see you as a friend if he has to choose his words carefully when you are around. On the other hand, if he feels that he can share his thoughts with you without being pinned down all the time, he will feel as if he is talking with a friend.


Give him the space to speak his mind out without being too judgmental. If you must argue and fight with him on a certain issue, do it at some other time. Pinning him down while he is talking will set off a bad vibe.


15) Be a little tomboyish when you are around your boyfriend

Behaving like a tomboy in front of your boyfriend has its rewards but it can also be risky. If you can pull off the tomboy appeal by listening to his kind of music, playing sports with him, dressing casually and doing stuff that other girls won't, you will definitely become his friend.


But on the other hand, playing the tomboy card excessively can work against you. Wearing tomboyish clothes excessively may make you look less attractive in his eyes.


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