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How to deal with a nagging wife: Ways to get your wife to stop nagging

Updated on November 15, 2013

How to deal with a nagging wife? There are better ways to get your wife to stop nagging you, than to indulge in nasty arguments, name calling, foul rants and fights in front of the kids. A little maturity, calm attitude, heart to heart chats, opening up communication and letting go of annoying habits are really all it will take to ease out the frustration. Find out how you can be a good husband and not be nagged to your wits' end.

Whoever thought there would be a bright side to nagging? Set specific days of the week or the month for stuff that your wife nags you about. Make it into a fun activity that you can enjoy together as a couple or as a family.
Whoever thought there would be a bright side to nagging? Set specific days of the week or the month for stuff that your wife nags you about. Make it into a fun activity that you can enjoy together as a couple or as a family. | Source

1) Appoint specific days for everything your wife nags you for: Do stuff together

Marriages and relationships are all about setting goals and doing things together as a couple. Your wife's nagging can turn into a cute little goal setting exercise which you both can do on specific days together.

For example, if your wife keeps nagging you about the mess in the garage, appoint a certain Sunday of the month when you can both get your hands dirty and clean it up. Set up a barbecue out at the back so the whole family can come together and have fun.

If your wife keeps nagging you about not being romantic and being a complete bore, fix a weekly date night. Scheduling a date night sounds lame but maybe that is what you must do if the priorities of work and children are bogging you down. For example, you can have Thursday as your date night. Drop the kids off at their grandparents' place and have a fun date just like you used to when you were a couple before getting married.

The best part about appointing specific days is that it will deal with two core issues, which will strengthen your marriage. It will eliminate the nagging factor and it will also help you bond together as husband and wife.

2) Talk about the core issue: Maybe it is something very insignificant

Get to the bottom of the nagging issue by looking at the core reasons why your wife nags you. Maybe it is something so insignificant that a calm level-headed conversation can make your wife realize how pointless her arguments really are.

Having a practical and non-confrontational conversation is the first step to help her notice how unnecessary it was to pull you up all the time.

3) Ask your wife if this is the example she wants to set in front of the children

The sight of their mother pulling up their father for silly little things doesn't eventually become the best of childhood memories. Rants, arguments and fights can scar children emotionally on a very deep level.

Use this very real and valid point to make your wife stop nagging you, at least in front of the kids. This way, the nagging will be limited to the bedroom in hush conversations which don't get out of hand.

Zone out and focus on whatever you are doing when your wife starts nagging you. Don't overdo it, else it may turn more volatile.
Zone out and focus on whatever you are doing when your wife starts nagging you. Don't overdo it, else it may turn more volatile.

4) Zone out when your wife nags you: The art of selective hearing

Deal with your wife's nagging by not dealing with it at all. In other words, zone out and do your own thing when your wife nags you. Let her have her say and let her walk away. Don't get worked up and don't say a word. Once your wife calms down, start your normal conversations as if nothing has happened.

This is tricky because it can go both ways. If it works, your wife may realize how numb you have become to her rants and how pointless they have become. But if it misfires, she will get more agitated about the fact that you just don't care anymore.

5) Step into your wife's shoes: Maybe her nagging is justified for something specific

Before you start getting annoyed, think about the stuff your wife is nagging you about and put yourself in her position. Ask yourself these questions.

  • Would you put up with her if she had the same habits
  • Is she asking for too much
  • Would you tolerate if she did the same thing to you
  • Is she on valid grounds to demand whatever she is asking you to do

Put all your differences aside and think with a clear head. Understand how your wife thinks by stepping into her shoes. It could be that her arguments have a good point and you need to get your act together.

6) Find clever ways to doge her nagging with smart conversational tactics

Sometimes, dealing with a nagging wife can be as simple as using smart conversations to slyly change the topic. Next time when you see your wife walking over to you with her nagging face, be at your charming best and change the topic completely.

While this is not a permanent solution, it will temporarily help ease off the frustration caused by nagging and subsequent arguments.

Have heart to heart conversations and get to the root of the nagging problem. Maybe the real cause of your wife's frustration is something else.
Have heart to heart conversations and get to the root of the nagging problem. Maybe the real cause of your wife's frustration is something else.

7) Nagging could be an outlet of bottled up resentment: Get your wife to open up

Sometimes nagging can also be a by-product of a deep rooted resentment against habits and behavior. Ask your wife if there is something that is bothering her. Get her to open up to you over a hot cuppa on a lazy weekend afternoon.

Emotions often get bottled up when kids and jobs swoop over the happiness in a couple's life. If this is happening with yours, dealing with nagging may be as easy as dealing with the real cause of her frustration.

8) Leave the argument: Get up and walk away when your wife nags you

Running away from an argument is never a good idea. It will set a bad example and it will leave your wife heartbroken. But sometimes in life you have to use hard measures to drive the point home.

If you think that your wife's nagging has gone out of control to the point where is tipping your marriage over to the other side, simply get up and walk away. Take yourself emotional and physically out of the frustrating situation.

If your wife follows you around the house, grab your car keys and go for a short drive. Listen to your favorite tunes and come back after your tempers have calmed down.

9) Stop getting annoyed by your wife's nagging: Marriage is all about compromises

Tolerance and compromise are two keywords that define all marriages. Perfectness in love is somewhat of a myth simply because two individuals are bound to bring two different set of ideas, personalities, habits and expectations into a marriage.

Think calmly about the stuff that you perceive as nagging. Maybe it is too insignificant to boil your blood over and it is easier if you just get it done with. For example, if your wife keeps nagging you about how you leave dirty underwear in the bathroom, just don't. A piece of cloth on the bathroom floor is just not worth fighting about. After all, you are not living in your bachelor pad anymore.

Don't budge if you think that your wife's nagging is not justified at all.
Don't budge if you think that your wife's nagging is not justified at all.

10) Stand your ground until your wife stops nagging you

Stand your ground if you think that your wife's nagging is not justified. Let her know that you are not willing to budge and the only way out of the situation is for her to give up nagging you.

This is not the most non-confrontational of ways but sometimes hard stances need to be taken to make people realize how their annoying habits are ruining relationships. Take this route only when you have tried all other possible ways to be on the same page as your wife.

11) Tell her how she insults you instead of arguing with her

Hold yourself back when you feel like firing off an angry rant across the living room when your wife nags you. Get a grip over your frustration and calm down. Instead of arguing, look into her eyes and tell her how insulted you feel when she nags you.

Play the sympathy card, be specific and don't trivialize the issue by bringing up stuff that is not directly related to the core issue. If your wife's nagging is genuinely unfounded, she will hopefully look into your eyes and straight to your heart.

12) Give into her fancies some times: Be a good husband

Being a good husband is all about letting go of silly little things that are not worth bickering about. Give into your wife's fancy and idiosyncrasies every once in a while to show your soft side. It won't make you any less of a man and in fact, you will get a lot of brownie points for being considerate.

Don't let your ego come in the way and don't look at this as a compromise. Marriages are all about accommodating and adjusting to each other. Giving in to her quirky demands now and then may be all it takes to ease the frustration in her mind.

Turn on your charm and quietly agree to your wife, whether it is helping her with a certain chore around the house or being more considerate about one of your habits which annoys her. Your willingness to comply will catch her off-guard and mellow her down.


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