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How to improve your marriage: 12 Ways to improve your Marriage

Updated on June 11, 2014

A happily married couple

a Happy married couple
a Happy married couple | Source

Ways to improve your marriage includes

1 Communicate more and support each other

2 Never take each other for granted, appreciate each other

3 Enjoy each others company, laugh more

4 Sex matters in marriage

5 Apologize when wrong and don’t keep secrets

6 Bond more by helping around the house

7 Show love and devotion to each other

8 Use your time wisely.

Marriage love and friendship

Marriage is ordained by God and has to do with two individuals coming together to have a family. Because each person comes from different backgrounds there are bound to be problems in the marriage until the couple works out a common ground to cohabit.

After romance, love, friendship and marriage couples face many challenges in there marriage which could be finance related, accommodation, and job related, having kids, school fees and even illness. How to overcome these problems so as to have longevity in marriage is very important. How do you stay committed to the union, have focus and grow old together without imploding.

Every marriage needs improvement even though you have found a common ground you need to learn more in order to grow blissfully and happy. Problems and difficulties will always come but how you handle it is important.

Improving your marriage involves commitment, love understanding, devotion and selfless service. Even happy couples fight and disagree but how do you face these challenges without hurting each other while improving your marriage.

Couple getting married

Married couple
Married couple | Source

Communicate don't ignore

Couple in the park talking
Couple in the park talking | Source
Never take each other for granted
Never take each other for granted | Source

Communicate more

I can’t over emphasize the need for communication in marriage; we are wired differently and are not mind readers so communication opens the way for dialogue. Discuss and make plans together, express you feelings either negative or positive over domestic issues so they can be handled together.

Talk more, communicate and have regular discussion while you strategies and make future plans together. By being a united front your family can succeed and grow while building a strong family unit. Never take your partners suggestion lightly instead discuss the pros and cons while reaching a logical agreement.

Your talk can revolve around bills, financial issues the home, how much you can both target save and how to create wealth that would be beneficial to the family.

Never take each other for granted

Living together for several years might make the couple complacent, you feel secure in your marriage and believe you understand your spouse completely. Taking each other for granted can spell unpleasant surprises and could even spiral into divorce in the near future.

Always appreciate any gesture that is thoughtfully given and never assume you deserve by saying after all you are married. Understand each others feelings, desires and wants listen attentively to what each person feels.

Gifts are cool in marriage

Awesome gifts can improve your marriage
Awesome gifts can improve your marriage | Source

Support each other

This is the holy grail of marriage without supporting each others aspiration, dreams and ambitions there is no point of the union. Lending support what ever the situation is an important aspect of marriage, it improves the marriage while allowing the couple grow and develop.

Support can be emotional support, financial support, through advice or just being there for your partner, never take each others dreams for granted because without dreams and ambition we might live empty lives.

Appreciate each other

Appreciate the hard work and sacrifices each partner is putting into the marriage, working three jobs or being a homemaker is tough so appreciate each others effort. You can show appreciation through gifts, surprise holidays, flowers or even words of encouragement and support.

A heart felt hug might even mean more than all the gold in the world, show affection, understanding and trust would tell your partner that you appreciate them. Have reasonable expectations and help each other develop to the best of their ability.

Improve marriage

Marriage improvement

See results

Enjoy each others company

Why did you get married in the first place if you cant stand each other, most marriages that work are based on friendship first before love and marriage. Remember the friendship that brought the two of you together, the trust and kinship. Kindle the joy, laughter and jokes and generally enjoy each others company.

Having fun together and not taking life’s challenges so serious can increase the love between you and afford both of you the tools to face the future together. Always make out time for fun activities, new adventures or leisure moments together.

Sex matters in marriage

Sex matters in marriage and is an important part of a successful union, being intuitive to each others needs can improve your marriage. Never use it as a weapon or deny each other this conjugal provision, instead spice it up with interesting ideas, gestures, gifts and visual stimulation. Having a satisfying sex life, spontinuity and understanding with each others feelings or needs is an important way to improve your marriage.

Remember your vows

Remember your vows in tough times
Remember your vows in tough times | Source

How to apologize to your partner

Apologize when wrong

A simple apology can stem the tide of divorce, resentment and unhinged anger, couples are bound to fight over issues but keeping malice and anger is a marriage killer. Always strive to resolve issue the very same day someone should step up and apologize especially if they are wrong.

Pride goes before a fall so forget pride in order to keep your home and ease the growing tension around the house, discuss issues later when tempers are low and find a common ground.

Arguments and disagreements is part of marriage but controlling the yelling, shouts and insults is very important. Never result to insults and name calling or bad language especially if there are kids around such actions give children bad impressions which may affect them in future.

Never ever result to violence out of anger or rage, there is no place for violence in marriage, if he hits you mistakenly the fist time forgive him but ever again walk out of that union. Never compromise your safety or that of your children; an abusive husband could eventually cause irreparable damage or even death.

Marriage and relationship issues

Home front
Personal improvement
Make time
Have a unified front
Don't keep secrets
Sex is important
Work together
You need quiet times
Curdle together
Work on your finances
Solve problems together
Discuss issues
Target savings
Apologize when wrong

A couple cuddling

A couple cuddling
A couple cuddling | Source

Have ME time

Not having timeout with your friends or quiet times alone without the family around can get you bunkers? Having time alone is therapeutic and rejuvenates you especially when you let your hair down and relegate family issues to the background.

Many husbands understand ME time that’s why sometimes they go to the pub to have a drink with their friends, that time allows them re-energize for the challenges ahead. The same principle applies to married women, if you have a trusted friend she can come over and you just talk about anything you fancy devoid of home pressures.

Me time might involve finding a hobby, watching television alone, pamper yourself and generally relax.

Bond more

Look for interesting ways to spice your marriage but never neglect the simple things that show true love and affection. Try curdling together and watch a romantic movie, touch, hold hands and take Sunday walks along the beach or around the neighborhood.

Kiss more and show each other true affection, the point is make time to rediscover the flame of love that brought the two of you together. The strength of a good home is having a unified front, work together in building your family, by taking issues together.

Help out around the house

We know you work hard but lending a helping hand once in a while to do house chores can be fun and could bond the couple even closer. Doing chores together gives room for communication, frank talk and learning what’s happening and new in each person’s life.

House chores is tough work and living it for one partner all the time is selfish, work together in organizing your home and making it a haven. If you have young kid between three and twelve make it a family tradition to do house chores together on certain days, this shows the boys that it’s okay to help out around the house.

Keeping secrets can be bad for your health

Don’t keep secrets

Keeping secrets can spell doom for the marriage; no matter how hurtful the secret is sharing it with your spouse is important. If there is true love and trust your spouse should be able to handle the secret, finding out the like or secret is worse than revealing it.

Getting to know the real person can only improve a marriage than destroy it; if the secret has the negative effect you can console yourself that you were truthful.

Time management

Everything you do when married requires time management our you go bunkers, a lot time for every thing like going for groceries, washing cloths, going to office. Organizing your time makes the home run smoothly without adding the pressure of undone tasks.

Time management is essential to improving your marriage and having quality time with each other. Follow a strict schedule, make rules together and formulate plans that would benefit the family together.


In order to improve your marriage you need to be committed in the relationship, support each other, and appreciate each others efforts. Other ways is to re kindle your love, don’t keep secrets, enjoy each others company, have a unified front and use time management.

Marriage can be both tasking and fun they way you handle it might have implications of having a long lasting marriage or not.


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    • tony55 profile image

      femi 3 years ago from Nigeria

      Hello nobody, we are only human and are bound to make mistakes but getting over them, learning and doing whats right always shines through.

      Thanks for sharing your experience.

    • no body profile image

      Robert E Smith 3 years ago from Rochester, New York

      I liked this practical article Tony55. It has so many vital areas and tells the proper way to act. In my first marriage I didn't do as many of those things as I should have. In my marriage now I do more. It took my wife a while to know that I was for real and was not someone that was pretending, for if you do all those things people sometimes think you are "the perfect mate." I am no where near perfect. I sin, I hurt people that I don't mean to hurt. I stumble and fall. But God is good and He restores me. It was a good article to remind me what is practical and important in my marriage. Bob.

    • word55 profile image

      Word 3 years ago from Chicago

      Hi Tony55, I admire your stand and advice for having a successful marriage. I look forward to that myself. Have you seen my poetic wedding vows for brides and grooms? They are free to use :-)