How to make your relationship sweeter than sweet
Tips to Manage Conflict with your Spouse
I am writing this article for those, who constantly see spouse conflicts and think it’s better to live alone or get divorce. These tips that I am listing below, are purely based upon my own experiences in my marriage as well as the items I have learnt in multiple classes.
I think by writing this hub, I would be able to complete one more duty towards humanity
Man and woman relationship is like a rose bud that remains always closed and keeps spreading its smell around. Now if this relationship is running terrible, the smell still spreads but awful one. There are so many simple items that we can all follow to turn this awful experience into lifetime unforgettable journey. Here are a few that would help the struggling couples:
1) Show Consistent Care and Love: As we get married and have spent a few years together, we take it granted that relationship is now strong and it would keep running. This is a wrong assumption. Like we provide water to flowers every day, we need water of love and care for our relationships. We need to show that to each other consistently. All those small items you did in the beginning should not fade away. Giving flowers, surprises, hitting road together, spending nights talking, watching box office hits, all gets faded when we all get into work life. It is up to us to take out time and bring back those days
2) Avoid Conflicts: The relationships have inherent conflicts. Avoid them as much as you can. I just answered a question and suggested. When you see conflict warming up take a pause and say “Hon, I am thinking about what you said. May be this is not best time to talk. Would you mind if we talked when we are both rested”. This would change the way you look at conflicts
3) Ignore Errors: In our earlier years we ignored each other’s the errors. Why to bring them now? Continue doing so. Marriage does not make anyone prefect however gives chances to mature. So if you do not like the idea of ignoring and still want to bring, a dialog in the bed is best. Do Saturday night meetings with your spouse and bring this up with constructive criticism. Would help you breeze through. Just express your feelings and mind-maps during the particular incidence. Give chance your spouse to explain without saying “you always have an explanation”. Examples help us learn and use them. Do not say you feel that the other is wrong. This hurts the ego and mutual respect. Rather say, “ may be, I may have done approached it differently, however what were your thoughts when you did this incidence”
4) Help Constantly: A constant complain from women is that men do not pick around in the house, a constant explanation from men is that they are stressed. Both are right. Men are brought up (and may be you are bringing up one) with “a feeling that you are responsible to run the house”, they have seen moms doing it always. So how could they change. Yes we are cosmopolitan and we are changing, but give it time to change. When you are entering a marriage institution, it is a commitment from both to fulfill certain duties. Those are none other but love and care. So do as much as you can and if you cannot “Hon, would you mind helping me out in this, I am really tired and would love to be working with you”. I mean to say bring it up keeping the respect on, it would miraculously change your life. If you are a man, learn to pick yourself. This is one best way of showing care. If you love your wife who is working, think she does all that you do and in addition she does home work. On Saturdays and Sundays she do not rest while you enjoy golf games or friends get-together.
So far, so much four tips that may bring a huge difference in your life. If you need more relationship advice, feel free to comment here or send email.
My other relationship articles
- Should I get divorced?
The following article takes a closer look at the divorce and its root causes and provides the tips on avoiding divorce.