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I AM A GOD- Part 1(Dealing with Feelings)

Updated on September 4, 2015
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Mridul is an AMFI registered Investment Adviser and IRDA approved Insurance Agent. Biggest dream- A better world. Biggest passion- Life.

The What, How and Why method

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You open the door and there's the delivery guy with that stupendous royal blue shirt, and he arrived just in time! You get to wear it to work. You had a special someone in mind when you bought this and today you ask her to dinner. You feel super confident.
So you wear your best cologne, apply just enough hair wax for the naturally sharp look, also the beard looks particularly lively. You didn't get much sleep because of the project report but somehow you feel brand new. You put the shirt on, and DAYUM! is that George Clooney? Not the nose or the cheekbones. Or the eyes. Or the lips but that's George motherfuckn Clooney right there! You're gonna be unstoppable today both with your presentation and with your girl!
But he moment you step into your office, people start giving you strange looks. Laura and Haley giggle shamelessly, Vince points at your shirt and whispers something in Claire's ears. Claire starts guffawing, her ass falls to the ground and rolls down to your foot.
What do you do now?
Not with her ass, with yourself.
How do you feel?
Are you as confident now as you were in the morning? Are you going to ask her out? Do you feel good enough to give that presentation? Probably not right? Why? What changed?

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Nothing. Absolutely nothing, that's what's changed.
Don't let other people's reactions be the reason of your life's actions. Feelings are perhaps the most powerful thing in the world and if you don't have power over your feelings, good luck being happy.
I'll give you a simple trick that I follow. It immediately transcends me from anything that I might be feeling, to a state of logic and reasoning. Ask yourself 3 questions. What, How and Why. In this particular case you're about to feel like an utter disgrace to humanity, stop your mind right then, request it to hold that thought for a bit, go to your desk and sit down. Now, reflect.
Q1. What am I feeling?
A: Anger and despair.

Q2. How did I end up feeling this way?
A: I was in this fantastic mood and then these people looked at me as if my nipples were showing. Most of them laughed. As if I had three.

Q3. Why did I feel so?
A: Because I thought I looked ravishing and they convinced me I didn't. But..

Great, well done! Now you're out of the feeling zone and into a logical state of mind. This is the first step.

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Have you ever been to India during Holi? It is a festival involving Bhaang(a delicious creamy milky narcotic), colours made of chemically produced industrial dyes, and an occasional drunk ass grandpa groping intoxicated aunts.
The colours, given their chemical nature, are pretty difficult to remove. You need at least three showers and a period of 72 hours to completely get rid of every inch of colour on your body. But Indians are smart. What we do(at least some of us do) is we smear hands and faces and pretty much everything that's gonna be exposed, with coconut oil or cream. That way, even if we look like King Kong just swallowed a goddamn rainbow, after the shower it is as if we didn't play with colours at all.

This is exactly what happens with us, in our lives. During interactions with people. They all carry little pouches of colours. Colours hundred times more stubborn than our Holi ones, and this time, they throw them with their mouths. And if we forget our cream, then that's the end of it. The colour becomes a part of us. These colours stick to us for years, sometimes lives.
This is how our personality is shaped. We are a little bit of everything we have ever seen.

My point is, don't let anybody smear your ass with any damn colour of their choice! Whenever somebody tells you something that makes you feel bad about yourself, and not just bad the moment they say something that makes you even the slightest bit uncomfortable, reply 'Really you think so?' and proceed to register it in your mind as something to think about later on.
This way, not only do you make yourself flexible and open minded to someone's beliefs or criticism or issues with you or whatever it may be, but also you Do Not ACCEPT their words at face value. By saying 'really? YOU think so?" you make sure that it stays what it is. HIS/HER opinion. Nothing more nothing less.

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Be the Master

What we feel is what we do. Think about it.
Everything you have ever done, every single action that you have taken in your entire life, has been the result of a feeling that compelled you to do so. How many of these feelings were triggered by others? How many regretful actions taken in the spur of the moment? If only I had thought it through. I was so overcome by joy/anger/grief/excitement that I couldn't control myself. If only I had. I wish I had.

F*ck the regrets man! Let's put and end to this right the f*ck now! Be the lord of your feelings. Be Tony goddamn Stark! All those tiny little bullets of anger, resentment, pain, subjugation fired at you just clink off your iron suit and fall down. You're Iron Man. Wake up tomorrow and wear your armour before leaving for work. And let's hope someone says something horrible to you. That'll be fun! Picture it as a bullet hitting your shiny armour; Listen to the clink. Hear it loud. Hell, it's not even that loud, it's f*cking powerless. If you practice a little bit, you'll NEVER feel another person's anger or bitterness or dissatisfaction rubbing off on you. When you appear calm and talk logically to someone yelling at you, very soon they don't know what to say anymore, and you win their respect. This will happen Every Single Time.

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    • mridulrai profile image
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      Mridul Rai 2 years ago from Kolkata, India

      Hello :) how are you

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      mccart 2 years ago

      hi there

    • mridulrai profile image
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      Mridul Rai 2 years ago from Kolkata, India

      Lendell Sapphira- You are very welcome.

      newbizmau- Thank you! :)

    • newbizmau profile image

      Maurice Glaude 2 years ago from Mobile, AL

      It was worded aggressively but it may get the point across and keep the attention of some readers who might not normally read a self help article such as this. So I say well done.

    • Lendell Sapphira profile image

      Helen Dellomes 2 years ago from Philippines

      Thanks for making me realized things I should have done long ago.

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