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I Love You Doesn't Really Mean I Love You

Updated on January 15, 2020

Does love really mean love?

So you all my know the famous three letter words that can melt a girls heart away. Matter of fact it can melt anyone's heart if the right person says it. But does it really mean what its suppose to mean or are these words said just so people can take advantage of you and use you for whatever purpose they have? Growing up I would always hear my father talk about how much he loved my mother and like wise. The love they had was pure and innocent and true. It was the kind of love that sunny had for the black girl in the movie "The Bronx tale" or the kind of love that Rocky had for Andrean in the movie "Rocky". It was forever Love. A love so strong that no one or nothing can break apart. Till death do them part! Now fast forward 10 to 15 years later and that love is not what it was when I was growing up.

Now that I have become more older and a little bit wiser I find myself contemplating the true meaning of " I love you". Guys in today's society will say it just so they can get "some" or get whatever they want from you, whether it be money, a place to stay, clothes ,sneakers whatever the case may be. I find myself dealing with how to tell if a guy really does love me. Yes don't get me wrong guys are charming characters and they will say or do anything just so they can have control over you. I'm not saying women are dumb but when it comes to men we most definitely are. We allow men to do whatever they want without any consequences to their actions in the name of love. Trust me I know, I have gone through it and still do. I ask myself every night if and when will I find the love my parents had. Why can't a beautiful girl like myself and so many out there find a partner that turly loves them for them and not because of material possessions. When a guy tells me he loves me I suspect that he does and just do whatever he commands of me because that's just my nature but just like how the devil was an angel first, wolves can also come in sheep's clothing. This meaning that a guy may appear so nice and gentleman like, he may say all the right things and do all the right stuff but there is always two sides to people. Behind clothes doors the "wolf" may come out.

My Conclusion

So do I honestly believe that "I love you" really means "I love you"? No I don't!! I may say it and believe that when I tell someone I love them I really do but that's not the case for most people out there. I guess some people blame human nature on how they act. They may say that they are a playa or that's how they were raised. But I believe that no matter where your from or who you are " I love you" should always have a universal meaning. What do you think?


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    • dashingscorpio profile image


      5 years ago from Chicago

      The problem most people have with hearing the words: "I love you" is they (assume) everyone has the same definition for love and expresses their love in the same way! One guy serves breakfast in bed and the other fixes the car.

      I once did a radio interview and the host told me he usually asks a woman he's dating the following question: "How do you know when you are loved?"

      You'd be surprised at the different answers people give . Everyone has their own litmus test: "If you loved me you would....etc" And if that person doesn't do whatever they "expected" it means they don't "love" them!

      Essentially the goal is to find someone who loves you (the way you) want to be loved! Some people expect romance while others expect help and still others want a combination of hearing the words, seeing deeds, and being made to feel "special", and there are those who will only believe you love them based upon how many hoops you will jump through to prove you put their needs/wants ahead of your own.

      Yes it's true that young men in particular have been known to utter the words I love you in order to have sex or get whatever. Some women have an unwritten code that states they will only have sex with men who tell them they love them. From these guys' point of view both got what they wanted.

      Hearing the words "I love you" should not elicit an automatic response from a woman like the Pavlov dog experiment. Do only what you want to do!

      It's been said that men fall in love with their eyes and women fall in love with their ears. However with age comes wisdom. Men learn everything that glitters is not gold and women learn that actions speak louder than words.

      The reality is ALL new relationships began with an "infatuation phase" where both people are bending over backwards to impress one another. The word "no" is seldom if ever used during those first 3- 6 months. Unfortunately a lot of folks become "emotionally invested" during that period and when their mate reveals their "authentic self" after the first major fight or boundary discovery the dynamics of the relationship changes. With each fight we're being taught what not to say or do in order to avoid having an argument. If one keeps at it they'll either end up walking on egg shells or decide they can't live like that and breakup.

      There's nothing wrong with someone saying "I love you". The problem is if you assume it means what (you) believe it should mean.

      There are those who use the word love as meaning they care.

      If someone ever says: "I love you but I'm not (in love) with you."

      What they just said is: "I care a lot about you BUT you are not (the one)!"

      Never separate your mind from your heart when making relationship decisions. The purpose of the mind is to protect the heart.

      One man's opinion!:)


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