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Marriage Still Has Meaning

Updated on May 6, 2008

Generational Differences

I think at 22 I am still "nextgen", though I feel so much older most of the time. This is probably because I am married! Seriously though, I think that my generation is like any other generation regarding marriage, some of us believe in it, and others make a mockery of it. The only difference is that our parents, many of them divorced, taught us that divorce itself is no longer a social stigma. Our grandparents may disagree, but for the most part, we know the neighbors won't treat us like a pariah if we end up in divorce court. Maybe people in the past didn't get divorced as often, but there was certainly a fair amount of abuse and infidelity, people just didn't leave over it, that's all.

Working Hard, Or Hardly Working?

I personally have married friends my age who are starting families, finishing up Masters degrees, and have satisfying marriages. I also have observed my younger sister in very unbalanced and unsatisfactory relationships. What I have noticed about the relationships/marriages that work is that they are made up of people who believe in hard work. If we as a generation are suffering from anything it is instant gratification sydrome, which can indeed have a huge impact on marriage. Husband not pleasing you lately? Farting, cursing, and playing too much World of Warcraft? Time for a divorce! Wife gained 15 pounds, wants you to pick up your socks, and only makes 3 types of meals? Time for a divorce! We want it, and we want it now!

In order to make any marriage work a person needs infinite amounts of love, and a lot of patience and understanding. The first year of marriage is indeed the hardest, and if a person is not willing to work their behind off trying to make things work with their partner, the marriage will not work. It is not easy, and it is not always fun. But the good times, and the fact that you've gained a partner, someone who is on your side, is more than worth it. Don't lose faith, us marriage minded youngsters still exist out here, somewhere.

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    • deepateresa profile image

      DEEPA JOHN 

      6 years ago from Trivandrum, Kerala,India

      Let it be any age , being responsible enough to get the family go is what is needed for a perfect married life.

    • Jason Matthews profile image

      Jason Matthews 

      7 years ago from North Carolina

      Wonderful Hub! THANK YOU for sharing!

    • marisuewrites profile image

      marisuewrites 

      9 years ago from USA

      You know, your article brought to mind something I've been simmering about for years.  I really think more training ought to be given, at least more information, about how to handle matters of the heart.  Nothing would be wrong with not only families talking more about our emotions and how to cope with love or the loss of it, but also offering information in schools as early as elementary. 

      Our society has changed so drasticially, with more violence demonstrated in media and domestic situations than ever before.  Violence or lack of committment is seen more and more as a choice; the "if I can't have you, no one can" is a scary but frequent decision for some couples and individcuals.

      Rejection is extremely difficult to handle or accept, but it can be done, we can get over hurt, and we need to learn how.  Believe it or not, there is a strategy, a plan, or "steps" in coping with loss, but we are not shown them in families, nor taught them in schools or churches.

      I begins with self respect and then blooms to respecting others.  Certainly divorce or separation is here to stay, but it doesn't have to be as painful or violent as it often turns. 

      Hmmmm,  I just might write a hub about this.   Thanks so much for your information and observations of emotional attachment and marriage and divorce and you bring a fresh view from the younger-than-I-am age.  =))  great hub!!

    • amy jane profile image

      amy jane 

      10 years ago from Connecticut

      I am a bit older then you :) but I think it is the same for gen-x too. I have been married 9 years, and many of our married friends are now choosing to divorce. There is no judgement here, though I see how hard it is on them emotionally. it does, like you said take an infinite amount of love! When you add children to the mix it is a completely different experience!

    • desert blondie profile image

      desert blondie 

      10 years ago from Palm trees, swimming pools, lots of sand, lots of sunscreen

      Both my daughters are fervent Christians, they enjoy great socializing with their church groups and have access to activities, programs, friends...all sorts of positive life activities with the churches they've joined in their new "post college" towns. AND, for both, marriage still very important to them. My marriage to their father ended in divorce, my parent's own marriage ended in divorce. BUT, they still see marriage as a very important, sacred and wonderful choice for their lives. MY oldest, 24, will be married in two weeks!

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