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Relationships -- How to Meet the Woman You Want

Updated on May 7, 2013


Writers can develop some powerful advice by connecting with the readers needs. Just imagine yourself already reading our article for the sake of that love... that probably is walking around you, and even giving you 'hidden' hints.

You happened to catch with us and even put that appointment, laundry, ex-gf on hold just to keep up with our writing. You know what? At this very second we just have a mind and a heart to help you. So let's see how can we share some secrets and take care of you. We consider YOU already a friend that is in need of advice. "Two sugars and cream, please!" Here we go:

What women want

Have been lucky enough to talk to women of different backgrounds and nationalities. In the last 20 years, changes in social networking, media, music and even cultural barriers considered tabu, have brought a sociological consensus between women: most of us men are pigs and useless! From Halle Berry, to Demi Moore and back to Kate Winslet, relationships haven't last 'till God do them apart.

"Ops! That hurts!

According to the polls, men and women are becoming more than just selfish. In return there is not interest in real commitments anymore. Does it sound like a true statement from our ladies? Not really. Mothers, grandmothers, fathers and even siblings are on the look out for a man for the female sister/daughter, that at one point chose to live single. "Listen Pam sweetheart, I just met this wonderful guy for you... you know? We do want grand kids in the future, ya know darling...?"

Well, we just wanted to laugh...

Two way scenarios that meet by luck

A woman will see the world according to her upbringing, her expectations and her needs. A guy will be looking for that hot item, because let's be honest, the first thing a man wants to look and really check out is an interesting "asset," or a well endowed front end, courtesy of some silicons and a few thousand bucks.

It really happened to our ancestors and to our parents. The time, space, mitochondrial enzymes and indestructible energy was set for a couple to meet and hit it off.

"But what about us, Joseph?"

Just bear with me! You need to have the options on your side:

Why are you falling for that chick? You might ask...

Sooner or later your grand kids and that chick will ask you: Why did you fall for her? If you say, you just were attracted to her physical and qualities, there is not much to hang on after 45 years of a marriage.

You have to check your heart and go beyond those physical attributes. Is she the one that is going to sweep you off your feet for other things than just sex?

Maybe cooking? Same educational background on both sides? Knowingly we are setting a common scenario for both. Women need to be wanted and feel protected. Well some of them.

Some of our secrets for you, that gave us the best Colombian coffee!

Here are some tips for our guys out there. I'm backed up by so many followers that we must've missed. Hey! We are not super extended memory dudes!

Now fix that belt!! and clean that sweat from your face:

  • Study the girl thoroughly! She is doing it too, by winking her eyes to their girlfriends (across the dancing Hall) "Is he okay girls?"
  • Look for common interests: Music, outings, beliefs, hopes and so on..!
  • Do not... do not mention the word sex for the first 172,800 seconds (48 hours)
  • If you can cook, dance, write poetry, speak 3 languages... then you don't need us!
  • No! No S-e-x Yet! If we keep speaking about it, we might get banned... you get it!?

The Bonus

  • Come down to your feel and save the world: Be honest with yourself. If you hook up with that girl, you are stopping her from having a chance to meet a whole new world so...
  • Do not be selfish
  • Be fair and be square. You cannot date the hottest chick, unless your dad owns an Oil Company
  • Movies are fiction. Happy endings are not for real life. Just be honest and learn as you go.
  • Be humorous. Learn to sing a song that can appeal to them
  • Read self improvement books. You have been exposed to your 'tainted' friends and we don't want you to be another loser.

Some asked our secret on an email...?

There is math and mindful psychology involved in this hub.

Humor is the key. 'Senses' will follow a natural course, and the rest will be added to AdSense. But in general we tried to write a helpful article. We do it in a fun mood and with no pressure. Hope you enjoyed this one!

Never say... never ever...again?


Submit a Comment

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    Morning Barry,

    Thanks for the compliments. We do not own an Oil Company... so far...!

    Your comments are kindly appreciated. Thanks again. Great to meet you Wah Lee.

  • Barry Wah Lee profile image

    Barry Wah Lee 5 years ago from Auckland

    Very nice, and women would like to get someone like you too. They should be advised not to converse about your oil wells or whether you have any, and if any have any, then how many! Also, even if they may have an oil well, the girl should talk more about how they might be affecting his day, and not his pay. Plus, she should also offer to reciprocate any dates. It may impress him to have this offered, even if he has no need to be shouted.

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    Morning Epi,

    Glad you found her at last! And thanks for stopping by. There is no HP without our Colin. Thanks for your kind words, for our humble piece.


    ``Ubani, We appreciate your visit and your comment. Hugs to you brother!


  • ubanichijioke profile image

    Alexander Thandi Ubani 5 years ago from Lagos

    Good one, I love everything here. Great advice fused with humor. Kudos.

  • epigramman profile image

    epigramman 5 years ago

    ....I have found her. And in true epi-man style, much like you my dear Lord, I will bookmark this hub subject for my own personal reference files, and also share your insightful and often witty hub subject with our FB music/cinema group - with a direct link back here and to send you warm wishes and good energy from lake erie time ontario canada 11:49am

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    Morning Bobbi,

    great comments from you as usual. Nice seeing commenting on this hub. Have a nice week! Happy endings do happen indeed, you just have to be lucky as many of others. Thanks!

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    much appreciated alway exploring

  • PurvisBobbi44 profile image

    PurvisBobbi44 5 years ago from Florida


    This is a great hub---funny and serious---but I demand happy endings.

    I could write a hub on what women want and need from that unique animal called man. My list grows everyday, and when my girlfriends and I have a night out---I could write a book Ha!

    Thanks for another gift from you. And I love the video of the little boys, it was so Darling.

    Your Hub Friend,

    Bobbi Purvis

  • always exploring profile image

    Ruby Jean Fuller 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

    A great hub. I like your humor and the video ' You are my lady ' Is a favorite. Charlie bit my finger again is soo cute. Thank's for the share

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    MG Singh,

    Thanks for commenting on this article. Will be checking your hubs. Great titles I saw on my Iphone. Thanks anyway!

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    Hi Tammy,

    No is not me! This just came in handy for the fun hub. Happy endings do happen but are never scripted or intended to happen. That's a behind the scenes shooting. So is a bonus for a life well lived. Thanks for your humorous comments. You rock!

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago


    Sure you can link to my hub. We appreciate your visit. Thanks for pouring your heart on those comments!

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    Martie Coetser,

    Seen that dad of yours and he was a very handsome guy. No wonder you have that powerful mind, who won't take prejudice as an option. If we ever get out there writing movie scripts, probably will need to be introduced to SA media, through your diplomatic connections! You are always making us smile, and we thank you for the chuckles!

    @Vellur, you are right! Some secrets are just there in front of you. Pointing them out can be some sort of an art...

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 5 years ago

    Maria Jordan,

    Thanks for comenting on this hub. You are such a darling. I will have to interview you next time. Where is Charlize?

    @McBirdBKS, You were so funny! An Oil Company would help us a lot in spending more of the money availbale.

    @Billybuc, Bev knows you are not going anywhere and it was agreed on a heart to heart conversation between you both. Don't you remember? Thanks for being up there hopping around.

    @GypsyRoseLee, Your man is happy and you are the happiest; well don't give it away. Just tell him how much you care about him. Great comments you do!


    You are very welcome and thanks for leaving fun comments. Colombian coffee beans are grown at a temperature above 78 degrees and have a unique taste for its quality. They are harvest at hills and highlands down in rich Colombian soils.

  • MG Singh profile image

    MG Singh 5 years ago from Singapore

    Great hub. Enjoyed every line of it

  • tammyswallow profile image

    Tammy 5 years ago from North Carolina

    Question... is that you in the first video... how to get "nice assets?" Had to ask. :)

    This is a great hub for guys but a little pessimistic when you say: "Movies are fiction. Happy endings are not for real life. Just be honest and learn as you go." I guess no matter how many times I fail I don't think I would ever give up hope for a happy ending.

    I do agree that a sense of humor goes a long way in attracting a special someone. Women aren't as obsessed with a man's looks as he is with hers. A great sense of humor can make someone very attractive. Great hub!

  • Tonipet profile image

    Tonette Fornillos 5 years ago from The City of Generals

    Another worth big smiling hub, Lord.

    "Be humorous. Learn to sing a song that can appeal to them", what a singing world to have soon - that's if guys memorize their number :=)... and your tips of May I link my "Fat But Beautiful" to this worth-reading hub? "Oh, sure you can", says Lord :=)..thank you!

  • Vellur profile image

    Nithya Venkat 5 years ago from Dubai

    Aha - secrets revealed!!! Great hub :)

  • MartieCoetser profile image

    Martie Coetser 5 years ago from South Africa

    Oh my gosh, no Lord, YOU are not one of those pigs... Lol!

    Thanks for this smile-provoking hub, and of course I am one of your back-ups.

    You've got some lovely videos in here!

    Now when are you going to open an oil company? Please appoint me as your bookkeeper. P-l-e-a-s-e :)))

  • LaThing profile image

    LaThing 5 years ago from From a World Within, USA

    Great hub, enjoyed it more then you will ever know ;)

    Still pondering over it! Hmm...? What's with the Colombian coffee? I love them by the way....

    Awesome, voting up and .......

  • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

    Gypsy Rose Lee 5 years ago from Riga, Latvia

    Voted up and awesome. This was a delightful piece to read Lord. Enjoyed it lots and thanks for the mention. My guy sure got lucky to have me. lol Love the videos.

  • billybuc profile image

    Bill Holland 5 years ago from Olympia, WA

    Great hub; I enjoyed it immensely as I always do when you write. I am one of the lucky ones....I have the woman I want and I'm not letting her go.

  • mckbirdbks profile image

    mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

    Note to self. Start an Oil company!

  • marcoujor profile image

    Maria Jordan 5 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

    Oh LORD...

    B A M..............sing their favorite song, sing it badly, but for heaven's sake, sing it..... Barry White, just sayin...

    UP & Beautiful... like you! Thank you for the kind mention.

    Hugs, Sista Maria