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Top Two Reasons Why Remaining Single is For the Strong at Heart

Updated on March 20, 2012

The corner cafe at the city, four good friends met. Two are married with kids. One is divorced with a kid. Another is divorced, no kids, and decided to remain single for the rest of her days.

"Romance is just not for me." She often claimed.

Two cappuccino, a mocchaccino, and a cafe latte, we chattered. Among the many topics brought upon our table was living without partner or remaining single. We all agreed that that life style is just as challenging, and we give our utmost admiration to those who decide to remain single for the rest of their days, be it of conscious decision or circumstantial.

Why shouldn't they? In this planet, where living with a partner is the majority and romantic relationship predominates, the decision is certainly not an easy one. I asked myself whether I can walk the pathway of being partner-less. My answer: most likely not, even if I can turn back the time and decide otherwise.

This thought then brought me to the conclusion that remaining single is for the strong at heart. Reflecting upon my own thoughts and experience, here are the top two reasons I can think of :

  1. One has to be strong at heart to go against the "current," as the world dictates that you need to be with the special someone. Remaining single would mean that "I am my own partner," and loneliness is dealt with promptly without too much fuss. What's more, desperation for a romantic relationship, be it driven by our emotion or biological needs or both, probably doesn't exist in the dictionary. In short, one has to be content being just with her/himself.
  2. One has to be strong at heart to go against the "current," as the crowds usually consist of couples. (As there are less singles people.) Remaining single would mean walking in this life as a unique individual. In cultures where being married is seen as the ultimate goal in life, I've known a couple of people who were disown by their families for walking on a different path. Yet, they are just as grateful for remaining single. Further, peer pressure of being with a partner or marriage probably has a little meaning, if not at all.

Decided to remain single in this couples' world? You've got an admirer (and probably many more out there...)


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    • profile image

      Calvin 5 years ago

      Single men!.........If you are going to read one book this decade…..this is book! If you have a low opinion of women now…wait until you read this book….you will run from them!!!!!!!!!!

    • Anne Burlinson profile image

      Anne Burlinson 5 years ago from Australia

      Thanks Joyette!

    • Joyette  Fabien profile image

      Joyette Fabien 5 years ago from Dominica

      I share your view; being single whether by fate or design is a difficult path to walk. Definitely not for the weak hearted!

    • profile image

      ASHA 6 years ago

      been single is not what people want, is how you feel about some relation until one decide to be single than getting hurted, and sure is a stong decision one made.

    • shibashake profile image

      shibashake 8 years ago

      Very thought provoking. I would definitely agree with you that being single is for the strong of heart. Whenever I lived alone, I would miss really simple things like not having someone to talk to about the sillyshow on t.v.; doing whenever hugs; and having a nighttime bolster and hot water bottle all rolled into one :)

    • Anne Burlinson profile image

      Anne Burlinson 9 years ago from Australia

      Thanks for the reference.

    • bohica profile image

      bohica 9 years ago

      Historically, second sons became priests and monks. Second, unmarried daughters or those without a dowry. There was the nunnery.

      To the era which you refer, check out,, Salic Law establishes that an individual person is legally unprotected by law if he or she does not belong to a family.

      Roman law and biblical law gives the father the right to kill their wives and children.So to tell your father that were going to remain single, for whatever reason, you are taking your life in your hands.

    • Anne Burlinson profile image

      Anne Burlinson 9 years ago from Australia

      Thanks for the info!

      From what you're telling me, I'm even more convinced that staying single is only for the strong at heart.

      Historically speaking, the phenomenon for both women and men is not new, and did not always end in outcasting the individual. Priests, monks, nuns are examples =) But speaking about this group would require a different approach.

    • bohica profile image

      bohica 9 years ago

      A very interesting hub that raises the question.

      However, being single, for a female, is only recent phenomena.The movie "Miss Potter", demostrated just how recent it is.

      For a male, it meant that he was an outcast.

      Piers Anthony addresses this issue very admirably in the "Isle of Women".