ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel


Updated on February 11, 2012

I look around me and I see and hear the struggle of women with men. For whatever reason these women love these men.....IT'S POWERFUL. They endure things no one should have to endure; but their love for these men will not set them free. I know the hold of love; but we as women must let go. In many of these relationships it's not love that's holding us there, it's INSECURITIES, SELFISHNESS, PRIDE AND CONTROL ISSUES. What we fail to realize is we cannot control a MAN. We bog these men down with our problems and expect them to comply.

What we find is NON-COMPLIANCE to our list of demands. I found one thing to be true......MEN DO NOT "LIKE" DEMANDS! Another thing is the FALSE ADVERTISING from "both" men and women at the onset of relationships. All of us are guilty of doing what must be done to get a person; but we are NOT willing to continue to do those same things to KEEP THEM. We as women are guilty of jumping over the moon sprinkling the sugar, spice and everything nice to win the affections of men. Men are guilty of portraying the roles of strong, loving, family oriented and financially stable. What both find is DISAPPOINTMENT. He or she is not what they PRETENDED to be. Often the finding out occurs after the relationship has been consummated SEVERAL TIMES. It can happen in one setting or over the course of time. After several times of consummation....EXPECTATIONS rise to unimaginable heights. This is when the lines of communication begin to cross! What we as women consider to be love-making is actually just sex to men. This is not to say they don't love or even like us; it's saying......TOO MUCH, TOO SOON!

If many are honest with themselves they would admit that they both use SEX AS A WEAPON. Fatal mistake of both men and women. Many of us are products of our parents; manufactured in sin, woven of lies and handmade by the ideas of both our mother and fathers. What our fathers and mothers say and do while we are children effect how we become as adults. Our negativity is an learned process. Women who was once girls were taught that the way to a man's heart is between their legs and their stomachs. Men who was once boys were taught that the way to an woman's heart is between her legs and money. None of it is about love; it's about POWER. Both trying to be the ruler in the BEDROOM; both guilty of trying to make the other submissive through sexual acts.

In the end BOTH are to blame! Men are programmed to conquer as many women as possible as prizes to their MANHOOD. While women are programmed to conquer one man as the ultimate prize to MARRIAGE; therefore making her just as guilty as a man in her number of men she ends up dealing with over her lifetime trying to obtain this prize to her WOMANHOOD. It's all MANIACAL. Once we as women learn that our bodies are sacred; MEN will learn RESPECT. It's like an candy store out here for men. WHY, would a man want something he can easily get from any woman he can manipulate?. Although men are running about all willy tilly they are still in search of the ONE that can hold their HEARTS. The way to a man's heart is not through his stomach or what is between a woman's legs! Think about it! He can easily obtain both through his own merits.

Men and Women both fail at supporting the other with wholeheartedness and MEN take this very seriously. They want a woman who is strong; but weak for him. A woman who will share his dream for their life together. Afterall, this is the way GOD intended it ladies. Whether we like it or not; MEN are the heads of their family! This does not mean we be subjected to mistreatment if he choses to do so. You have legs.....WALK! If Men did what GOD put them in charge to do; we all would have loving,kind and committed providers and this would make MOST women submissive. This is not to say MEN are to carry the load of the families on their own and we sit at home, shop with his money and do nothiNG! No, we are too help him in anyway to maintain his house and family. MARRIAGE is an PARTNERSHIP! We both (men and women) need strong minded individuals with the common purpose of SUPPORTING one another. MARRIAGE is not an 70/30 % ratio state of being; because unequally yoked.....ONE WILL DRAIN THE OTHER. Once anything is completely drained; especially people, WE FAIL TO THRIVE which leads to the death of any relationship including MARRIAGE.

We as humans try to mimic one another; but in actuality we are not seeing the entire picture of other's relationships we are just witnessing the SURFACE, DISPLAY, PRETENSE, ETC.. Although we all require the same things such as nutrition to survive physically. Our mental/spiritual being is nurtured by GOD for any hope of survival together in this world. If both (men and women) follow the teachings of CHRIST as guidelines in every aspect of our lives we would RESPECT and LOVE ONE ANOTHER UNCONDITIONALLY. Once we realize that the CONTROL is not in our hands; but in the hands of GOD. We would be much happier people and would not need to manipulate, misuse and abuse one another. "ANYTHING" within person or out of person will FAIL WITHOUT GOD as the BEGINNING, CENTER AND END.

Once we "all" realize that our happiness does not depend on another person; but GOD, we will never be "Truly Happy." A person that has GOD INSTILLED within them will always be a JOY to be around. We find ourselves missing them when we are apart and the joy is renewed DAILY. Therefore, we will NOT grow tired of one another as opposed to being DISPOSABLE. We as women must understand that men will play; it's their NATURE. As with all things they will grow tired of the hustle and bustle of the GAME. Then and ONLY then will they seek the ONE that holds their hearts. The one that did not decide to join him in his lying and cheating games. The ONE that supported him wholeheartedly. The ONE that believed in him; regardless of the things he did or said. Most importantly the ONE who left; because she knew she DESERVED better. Holding on to someone or something destructible shows the "true" sign of weakness. Stop falling for everything and STAND for something. Have pride about yourself. LOVE GOD! He is the ONLY man which is INFALLIBLE. MEN are made in his "Likeness"; but are NOT your GOD! You do not worship him; you worship HIM. One is much greater than the other one; One is the ONLY one that can truly save you AND he is your CREATOR AND REDEEMER! A mere man cannot promise you an rose garden let alone the KEY to EVERLASTING LIFE. Unlike fallible men HE will not let you down and He will lead you to the man that loves Him and His Word and this will be the man that will love you until death do you apart. Until Men find themselves through GOD; they can't see you. You are just part of the GAME!

The biggest mistake we all make is that because someone attends church they know GOD. The question is does GOD know them! If they are ONE with Christ; trust me, it SHOWS! The proof is in the pudding so to speak. It's an unspeakable JOY! A joy you find not from being physical; but spiritually. TRUST will find the biggest devils in the church; but this is not to say you will find angels in the club. It's saying know the WORD and the word will help you know the difference between TRUE AND FALSE. No one can be both! We all live falsely in some point of our lives; BUT many of us find the TRUTH and it becomes every fiber of our being. For instance a good church girl is not going to be bumping at the club on a saturday night and be singing in the choir at the church a few hours later. Nor will she be raising all kinds of hell at home and then show up to church on Sunday screaming "THANK YOU, JESUS!!" Our walk with CHRIST is DAILY. Sure the devil will find a loophole in our souls and make many slip; but a Saint is not one to stay down; THEY GET BACK UP AND GET BACK IN LINE WITH GOD.

A true CHRISTIAN will repent and ask forgiveness of GOD and those they have harmed and most definitely will not do it AGAIN. Those who bear false witness; NOT! This is just a tool to manipulate others. KNOW THE DIFFERENCE! The strongest character of a Christian is....RESISTANCE TO WRONG DOING. They will remove themselves before they are caught up in anything that's harmful to GOD or another human being. A man or woman who consistently must say they are sorry has no TRUTH in them. SORRY is the sucker punch in the boxing match of lies told for them. MOVE ON and don't look back! The Bible clearly states: "You must NOT love yourself or another person more than you LOVE GOD." Through the LOVE OF GOD we can do all things; even SURVIVE the most horrendous injuries from the people, places and things that "we" choose, dwell and explore. Our choices are NOT aligned with GOD'S. This is why we suffer!

We dwell on features instead of the SHOW. Features are designed to lure; but the Show is the LOVE OF GOD. The peace and tranquility we find at the beginning is temporal. The spiritual and worldly affairs have nothing in common. Temporal will exist for a moment when Spiritual will carry us through this life unto the next. I have witnessed it! For instance a man and woman had been married over more than 50 years and loved each other greatly and was inseperable. The woman died first and in onset to her journey to the next life she asked to see her husband. Once she did she just wanted to touch him and see his face for the last time. Once this was done, she made preparations to move on without him; he no longer was her concern. She needed to correct her business with GOD. At the sunset of her life she followed GOD and did not try or want to remain here with her husband. It doesn't matter how much you love someone; YOU WILL DIE KNOWING THE LOVE OF GOD was all that mattered.

When he died she returned and prepared him for his journey to see GOD'S FACE. At the sunset of his life he followed GOD as well. Are they together in the afterlife; individually we will only find out once the sun has set in our lives; but THE one thing which is for certain. "ALL" things will work and come together to those that love GOD; especially in the END. Women KNOW your worth because you are too blessed to be stressed. MEN you are in God's hands and your greatness is with HIM. You as well are too blessed to be stressed. EVERYONE stop the games and become the ULTIMATE fighterS in the ARMY OF THE LORD! Once you both learn to defend satan's attacks there will be NOTHING; you cannot do without each other. As long as you both are aligned with "GOD'S RULES OF ENGAGEMENT!" A couple that PRAYS AND WORSHIPS TOGETHER STAYS TOGETHER! God Bless :)

Copyright 2012. ~ PFP


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • SweetMocha-Monroe profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago

      Thank You for stopping by and reading MsDora. All GLORY BE TO GOD.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      6 years ago from The Caribbean

      You made some really good points including "Men and Women both fail at supporting the other with wholeheartedness." I especially love the second marriage prayer. Thanks for these powerful helpers.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)