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The Little important Things...The Big Things To Nourish and PROTECT a Marriage
Things to Do and Not Do for an Enduring Marriage
The Little Things...The Big Things
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THE LITTLE THINGS:
The good morning/goodnight, hello and good bye KISS.
Do the GOOSING/smack on the butt as you pass by-if your spouse is ok with it.
A gentle CARESS
The WORDS...I LOVE YOU daily
Give her just ONE ROSE out of the blue for no reason at all. It doesn't need to be a natural rose. It can be a chocolate rose, picked from your neighbors garden or even drawn. You don't need to buy an entire bouquet.
Buy him his favorite candy bar(just one) out of the blue for no reason at all.
Send LOVE in the lunch box/bag: hank you card, favorite fruit, candy etc.
THE BIG THINGS: In addition to the previously mentioned in "Enduring Love"
** MAKE THINGS RIGHT: practice constant repentance. If you hurt your partner do follow all the steps to making it right--NOT just say I'm SORRY. Being humble enough to say I'M SORRY (privately/publicly if necessary) is great, but making AMENDS and NEVER doing it again are big healers and complete the process.
MAKE THINGS TIGHT: practice constant forgiveness.
*HOLD EACH OTHER...after sex, during sex, before sex, watching movies, sitting, in bed etc.
HOLD HANDS: walking, sitting, talking etc.
*MAKE TIME FOR EACH OTHER...AND BE CONSTANT: making an the effort to have alone time together is very very important-specially if you have kids: I know a couple that every Friday they stop working at 2pm and do not take phone calls as that time is reserved for each other and nobody else.They usually just go to a movie, but they are constant, they never miss a Friday no matter what. They don't have kids but they tend to work a lot.
COUPLES WITH KIDS: Get a babysitter and go out at least once-a-month. It is hard to find babysitters and afford going out, but is one a month enough? if possible I would say ONCE A WEEK, if not possible DON'T STOP! trying. Even putting kids to bed at a decent time and spending 20 to 30 minutes watching tv together (holding each other) is good enough.
DOES IT HAVE TO COST MONEY: Spending time together doesn't have to: My husband once decided we would go hiking every Sunday. Also watching a MOVIE or TV together when the kids are sleep (put the kids to bed at a decent time!).
MAKE EACH OTHER PRIORITY: when it's your time do not put it aside for other things, such as work, phone, family, friends It's YOUR time no matter what!
**DO HAVE MAKE LOVE AND SOMETIMES HAVE SEX and enjoy it...very important! If you are not having it, or enjoying it, figure out why. It is important that both spouses enjoy the experience.
DO NOT FORCE SEX!: Do not push too hard, if the other person really isn't up to it, this should be a fun enjoyable experience for both.
DO NOT BREAK TRUST: CELL PHONES. In a relationship there shouldn't be a reason for private texting or hiding calls: There shouldn't be singleness as you are ONE. I remember the days without cell phones when there was one answering machine at home and there were no passwords either. Everybody heard the message when the play button was pushed. This modern idea of my phone/ your phone...MY private life/YOUR life-- In my opinion is wrong and has only come about with the advent of the cell phone. We have since put both of our names and even kids names on our answering machines--on OUR CELL PHONES.
SHARE YOUR DAY: texts, calls, work happenings, facebook, twitter, etc. After all you are probably sharing these with other people. make time at dinner or at the end of the night to share who you talked to, texted, what happened at work, your drive, etc. Read your facebook feed together.
BE BEST FRIENDS: after all YOUR best friend should be the one you sleep with.
DO NOT USE HURTFUL WORDS/PUT DOWN YOUR PARTNER: do not ever name-call, or put down your spouse: hurtful words linger in the mind and replay painfully in the heart and are not easily forgotten.
DO NOT BACK STAB: never say negative things to your mother, family or friends about the person you love. You don't want your partner to feel like you are the enemy. If you need to vent go to a family counselor, support group or talk to the fish, the sky etc. and leave it there.
Buy Her a Rose
Fair Warning and Conclusion
I give fair WARNING!-- these things must be practiced MUTUALLY or they may not work. Imagine a carriage where one ox pulls to the right and the other to the left. The carriage cannot move and it becomes harder work for the ox as they pull against each other: indeed the carriage may break apart--so it is with marriage. Both partners must not just pull ,but pull in the same direction in order to happily move forward.
Marriage/relationships are a . In my opinion if you don't see it that way, you shouldn't be married. The likely hood that your marriage or relationship will fail is great. I believe a man by the name of Joseph Smith said something like this: if your WIFE doesn't like you in this world why would she want to be with you in the next? In the same token-- if your HUSBAND doesn't like you in this world why would he want to be with you in the next? MUTUAL journey
IF YOU HAVE SOMEONE AND YOU WANT TO KEEP THEM FOREVER...DO THE WORK.
Having and keeping a GOOD MARRIAGE takes work, focus, and sometimes sacrifice--that is LOVE.
If you and your partner practice the important little things, avoid doing the bad things, and do the Bigger things to mutually meet each other's needs THEN you may have a long and enduring marriage.
I wrote this as a follow-up to my other hub...
Cell Phone Privacy
In a committed relationship, do you think cell phones should be private:calls, texts etc.?
HOW MUCH DO YOU LOVE YOUR PARTNER-just for fun
Do you love your partner enough to want them for ever?
© 2012 crazymom3