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Ten Important Relationship Advice for Men and Women

Updated on April 25, 2020
Kerrian mcmahon profile image

Kerrian is a professional relationship expert and analyst. She loves to write on her observations and research concerning relationships

When it comes to relationship advice, there are several articles purporting to advise couples but 1 minute into reading, and it quickly becomes apparent that it is advice aimed at women alone. This advice varies in tone, from accusatory scolding to feminist-ic empowerment. They all give very good advice – to women. A man seeking relationship advice would have to continue his search. There are few articles advising men as well. Few.

I intend to go a different route with this post. By enumerating the problems relationships face, in which case I might indulge in shameless hand pointing, and then I will ultimately arrive at my goal to advise EVERYONE, (both men and women), on important relationship tips that help build a healthy relationship. For me though, it’s basically, “treat each other, the way you would like to be treated yourself”.

The Problems

1. Selfishness

Relationship problems arise because of the nature of humans. We are imperfect – and selfish. In my previous post, I discussed what women and men want in a relationship which includes, affection, devotion, respect, love, communication, sex, appreciation, and intimacy.

However, you might want something but it doesn’t necessarily mean that you can give it or will be willing to give it. It is the selfish nature in us, the survival nature and it has caused the demise of many relationships.


2. Little or no Communication

Another issue is communication, or in some cases, a lack of it. When people in a relationship are unable to effectively communicate, this is certain to cause problems in the relationship or marriage. That is why when couples fight, they always point to a communication gap as one of the problems in the relationship.

However, it is very common for communication issues to stem from men, who by nature are always reluctant to discuss their emotional needs and expectations in a relationship. Causing them to silently suffer when their emotional needs are not being met by their partners.


3. Misunderstanding

Another cause of strife or rancor in relationships is misunderstandings. This is an offshoot of not communicating properly. Where there is little or no communication, it can result in misunderstanding.

Understanding, being one of the foundations or pillars of a healthy relationship is very important. Where it is absent, the relationship can suffer.

The 10 Relationship Advice for Men and Women

If you’re a man or woman looking for a guide on how best to handle your relationship journey, then these tips and advice are meant for you.

1. Learn to Trust

In every relationship, trust is very important. A lot of people find it hard to trust other people and that can lead to some unhealthy relationship behaviors like jealousy and over control.

Trust in a relationship should be exercised by both men and women towards each other. It should encompass every aspect of the relationship, you should trust your partner’s choices, actions, and decisions, as well as their character.

Although, there are those who abuse trust and use it as a tool to get away with mischief and misbehavior. It is these people that have eroded the ability of some others to trust.

Still, you should not let this rob you of a quality that would make your life and relationship so much easier. Learn to balance your trust with vigilance and give people a fair chance.

2. Communication

Communication is one of the most important qualities in a relationship. It helps keep a relationship alive. When partners in a relationship communicate their needs and desires, they make it easier for the other person to understand the issues and take steps towards remedying it.

It is important in making plans and running a home. Communication conveys a lot of messages, affection, worry, appreciation, desire, and encouragement.

Where there is no communication it could result in hurt, grudges, and resentment. When your partner says or does something hurtful, failure to draw their attention to it could lead to outbursts.

Partners also need to learn when not to talk. If you are angry and say something hurtful, that you really did not mean, it could be misunderstood and escalated. Learn to keep quiet when angry.

3. Enjoy each other’s company

Sit back every day and enjoy each other’s company. Learn to live.

Play games, take walks, hold hands, spend quiet time together, go on picnics and dates, stay in and watch movies, send each other sweet notes and songs. Just enjoy each other and explore life together.

4. Be accepting of your partner’s flaws and weaknesses

At the start of a relationship, it’s always perfect and sweet. Until the flaws and weaknesses start to come out. It is not uncommon for couples to put their best foot forward and pretend from courtship into marriage.

However, we are not all perfect, so it is important for couples to learn to be accepting of their partner’s shortcomings, weaknesses, mistakes, and flaws.

Although, there are some flaws that are a deal-breaker and would put a strain on any relationship. It is left to you to spot them in a relationship and decide if you intend to continue with the relationship or not.

While being in a relationship is great, it is more important to be in a healthy, safe, and happy relationship.

5. Learn to be patient

Be patient with your partner. You are individuals with varying opinions and ideas coming together to relate, it would take all the patience you both have to understand each other.

You would not always agree with each other but jumping into conclusions and getting annoyed over little things would only drive a wedge between both of you.

6. Don’t be selfish

There are a lot of selfish people, so used to me, me, me that they are unable to adjust to a life of “we”. I must admit, women are the major members of this group. Always expectant by way of finance and gifts and hardly giving.

Going into a relationship with the mindset of being a liability on another is unfair and unhealthy. Just as women love gifts and flowers, men love romantic gestures as well, a loving note, a kiss here and there, and a massage.

It is important for both men and women not to be selfish in a relationship. Learn to be a giver as well, give respect, joy, love, appreciation, trust, expensive dinners, gifts, and jewelry. It is a two-way street.

7. Respect Each Other

Respect is very important in every relationship. You might be familiar but we are all human beings and need respect. Appreciate each other’s efforts and respect each other’s opinions, decisions, and even privacy.

Even though you are in a relationship, you should still give your partner the opportunity to be themselves. Don’t disrespect, insult, cheat, or be physically, verbally, mentally, emotionally, or sexually abusive in a relationship.

Also, you should not abuse privileges accorded to you by your partner, it could put a strain on the relationship before and after they revoke their trust and respect for you.

8. Be supportive

Men and women need to support each other in relationships. There are misconceptions about the types of support that should be accorded to a man or a woman.

However, I believe that both men and women deserve every kind of support they need, from financial and emotional support to moral support and encouragement.

Both the woman and the man in a relationship should support, comfort, and cheer each other on in their endeavors, it is also a way of showing affection and love to your partner.


9. Learn to compromise and accommodate

In life, there are times that we all need to compromise in other to reach a certain point or accommodate others. It is the same in a relationship.

A relationship involves two people with different ideas and opinions coming together to love each other and be together. However, in any such a partnership, there are bound to be conflicts necessitated by the differences.

Couples should learn to compromise their stance and meet each other halfway in order for there to be a resolution and forward movement in the relationship.

Where one or both parties are rigid in their stance, it is bound to keep them apart emotionally and lead to the end of that relationship.

Things cannot always go your way, and it can be frustrating but it is what it is. You need to make sacrifices sometimes.

10. Be best friends

A relationship thrives very much when there is a mutual friendship. This friendship creates a bond that transcends communication and all else. There will be an emotional connection as well as mutual understanding that makes you both sync perfectly.

Founding your relationship on the basis of friendship is an age-old recipe that never fails. Make your partner your best friend, inspiration, confidante, and partner in crime. You are in it for the long haul so you should enjoy it.

Finally

Having gone through this post, can you identify some solutions you can apply to your relationship?

My overall message is that you should treat your better half and partner the way you would like to be treated. We are all human beings and we crave love, respect, and appreciation in our relationship.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2020 Kerrian McMahon

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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      2 weeks ago from Chicago

      Learn to trust but don't (force) yourself to trust.

      Trust like respect should be something (earned) over time.

      Oftentimes people choose to (ignore) "red flags".

      Trust doesn't mean you don't get to ask questions. Trust means you (believe) the answers you were given to your questions.

      Anyone who loves you will seek to comfort and reassure you.

      Never separate your mind from your heart when making relationship decisions. The purpose of the mind is to protect the heart. Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself.

      Just because we don't get what we want doesn't mean there is a communication problem. There are two basic reasons why your partner will not give you what you've asked for after stressing it's importance.

      1. They don't have it to give. (It's not who THEY are.)

      2. They don't believe (you) are worth the effort to give it to.

      Either way you have to decide if not getting what you want is a "deal breaker" or not. If it is get out! If it's not learn to live without.

      There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships. We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them (as is) or move on.

      Life is too short to be trying to change water into wine.

      The goal is to find someone who (already is) what you want.

      No one is "stuck' with anyone! Suffering is optional.

      The goal is to have a "soulmate" not a "cellmate".

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde

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