The Thing You Must Do When You Meet Someone You Like

The problem is that we seem to think there is a huge shortage of men out there. It's like we think that he'll run off at the drop of a hat because he has options. Well yeah..so do we.

I was chatting to a single friend of mine last week and she said 'The problem is that most men are looking for the next best thing. You can't rely on meeting anyone decent these days.'

Seriously? She had no basis for this analysis at all. When I asked her how she knew this to be true she said it was just obvious. I didn't want to go all preachy on her and tell her that we get what we believe but....

When we try hard to make sure nothing goes wrong with the new man in our lives, because hey, he's bound to be off when a better offer comes along, then we don't get to enjoy what we have together. All we are doing is sabotaging a good thing. We start trying to say all of the right things to the point of not knowing what we actually do think ourselves. We make it all about him when it should be about the both of us. There really are lots of lovely men out there. If this one goes off then another will be along soon.

Sounds simple right? Unfortunately it's not quite as easy as it sounds. It's pretty important though. If we hold onto someone too tightly we are preventing them from being their true self. We are holding them back when we ought to be encouraging them.

In my humble opinion, the more you try to hold onto something, the less likely it is that you will succeed. You need to let go of that emotional attachment and let fun take over. What's the worst that could happen if you did just that? If he's really into you like he seems to be then he will just love you all the more. Men like women that have their own thing going on and vice versa actually.

I don't mean let him treat you however the hell he likes. I mean let him be whoever he is and do the stuff that makes him happy. Let him go off for that boy's night, congratulate him on the new job even though you know Lisa with the massive chest and long legs works there. So what? You are all that, you don't have to sabotage a good thing with jealousy.

Have The Confidence to Let Things Happen

Confidence in ourselves and our attributes as well as the confidence to let him be an individual too is what it really takes to make that special thing you have last and maybe become something really special. Not allowing things to take their natural easy path, and yes it can be easy, will cause all sorts of trouble.

Letting things unfold in their own good time and relaxing into it will make for a happier you in the long-run. I don't know of one relationship that has lasted when one is suffocating the other. Sure you might be able to sustain it for a while, during the honeymoon period, but it will have a shelf like.

You might be thinking I'm doing a U-turn. I'm not. What I am suggesting is that you have your own thing going on. You make sure that you are happy as an individual. Never place your happiness on someone else's shoulders. They won't be able to carry that burden for very long.

Fill yourself up with life. Do the things that make you smile, laugh even. See your friends. Don't ditch anyone in favour of him. Always go with your first arrangement. Put your happiness first but not in a selfish I want sort of way. If you can be happy on your own then you will never need anyone. Sure you will want people, but you won't be desperate and that will show. You will exude confidence and self-esteem and in turn you will become even more attractive.