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Thinking of the 'good times' after a break-up

Updated on April 18, 2012

Stuck thinking of all the good times?

Thinking of all the good times you shared from a past relationship is natural. It’s how it makes you feel that is important. Remembering only the good times and forgetting the bad, can make it harder to let go.

If this is the case, remind yourself why you broke up in the first place. If he has left you and you still want to be with him, it will be a blow to your heart and probably your ego, but you have to accept the situation and know he is not the right man for you. The right man will love you for who you are and will want to be with you. Don’t let feelings of rejection ruin your self-esteem - it happens to all of us and only means you are not right for each other.

Every relationship has its good times and its bad times. Try to be thankful for the great times you shared. They are part of your life and part of what makes you who you are. But realize they are in the past and you are now entering a new and exciting chapter of your life in which you will create new and wonderful memories. Look forward to them and get excited!

Create new 'good times'

Try to focus on having new experiences to form new good memories. Not all great memories are created by your partner. Plan a trip overseas or a weekend away with your girlfriends. Then the last 'great time' you had, won't be with your ex. The more memories you create between your past relationship, and the present, the easier it will be.

Consider these two women, six months after a painful break-up:
Woman One: has traveled the country, got a new job, met lots of new people, run a marathon, volunteered at a homeless shelter, and taken a painting class.
Woman Two: has done nothing but her usual days at work, day in and day out. Too sad to go out, she has stayed at home remembering all the 'good times' with her ex.

Which would you rather be? (Obviously you don't have to be so drastic but you get the idea.)

No matter how bleak things seem right now, you will find love again and you'll have new romantic memories to think about - but first you must let go. Right now, concentrate on your own life, your own goals, and creating new good times!


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