To Cohabitate Or Not To Cohabitate
That Is The Question
In the last forty years, the number of people ‘living together’ has increased by more than twelve times. Cohabitation, as it is called now, seems logical; what with divorce rates soaring, people should make sure they are compatible. Moreover, it makes sense to share expenses. However, are we lying to ourselves? While I can show Bible verse after Bible verse stating that extramarital sex is a sin, I will not be using them to construct my argument. After all, why should someone who is not a Christian care how Yahweh feels about cohabitation? For this article, I will state all the logical reasons why cohabitation is a bad idea, of which there are plenty .
Since the 1960s, the divorce rate in the United States has increased by almost as much as four times [1]. With the cohabitation rate increasing more than 12 times from what it was in the sixties, we obviously cannot blame all of the increase in divorce on the higher cohabitation rates. However, we do know this; eighty percent of people who cohabitate split up at some point in their relationship, either before or after marriage. Those who make it to the altar are 50% more likely to end up divorced than couples who did not cohabitate. In fact, just a month of cohabitation increases your chances of divorce.[2]
Why this is so is still a bit murky because there is no doubt that the argument for cohabitation seems logical. However, the argument, as logical as it seems, does not allow for the illogicality of the human being. This is not the first time we, as humans, have defied logic. Possibly the reason is that so many cohabitaters end up divorced is because they go into the relationship with one eye on the door, if things do not work out. People who cohabitate before marriage have a lower level of commitment; it takes more commitment to marry someone than move in with them.
Yet another reason, possibly, why cohabitation does not work might have to do with the history of the cohabitaters. For instance, cohabitating women are twice as likely to have been high school dropouts. Psychologist have noted that people who cohabitate seem to develop almost a contempt for their partner, they seem to have lost their respect for the person they profess to love. [3]
As if this is not enough of a reason not to cohabitate, there is the effect it has on children brought into these types of situations. Children of cohabitating parents are twenty times more likely to be molested[3] and 22% more likely to be incarcerated . They are, also, five times more likely to live in poverty and three times as likely to be expelled from school or become a teenage parent.[2] Furthermore, children born to cohabitated parents are 25% more likely to see their parents split than children of married parents. And for what? An idea that has not panned out, an idea that has been proven faulty?
The conclusion is rather obvious; cohabitation is a bad idea, and it benefits no one, whether you cite God as your higher authority, or facts. Making a relationship work is difficult enough; you do not need the added difficulties of cohabitation.
[1] DivorceInfo.com. (2012.) Statistics. Retrieved 9 March 2012 from http://www.divorceinfo.com/statistics.html.
[2] RayFowler.org. (2012.) Statistics On Living Together Before Marriage. Retrieved 9 March 2012 from http://www.rayfowler.org/2008/04/18/statistics-on-living-together-before-marriage/
[3] Christianity.com. (2012.) Why Living Together Doesn’t Work. Retrieved 9 March 2012 from http://www.christianity.com/11581630/