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Wedding Planning: Creative Ways to Include Friends and Family

Updated on May 24, 2010
There are ways to include loved ones besides a huge bridal party!
There are ways to include loved ones besides a huge bridal party!

When planning a wedding, some brides have a problem that is, in certain ways, enviable. They simply have too many friends and family members that they would like to include in their wedding. Short of having a bridal party of 50 people, it can be difficult to find way to include everyone.

The first thing to remember is that you should not feel obligated to include someone. If you are including people just out of a sense of obligation, then you may be creating unnecessary stress in your wedding planning. That is not fair to you as the bride. If, however, you truly do want ways to include people that are special to you, there are some ideas below about how to do that. 

Bridal Party

The bridal party is the most obvious way to include someone in your wedding. As mentioned above, unless you want a huge bridal party, this will only take care of a few people that you might want to incorporate into the occasion.

There are plenty of other ways to include the rest of the people that you care most about. 

Special Readings

Choose a few scriptures or a special poem and then select some people to read them before or during the wedding ceremony.

Alternative you can allow them to each choose a passage of scripture or a poem. If you prefer this option, be sure that all who are going to do a special reading coordinate so that the same scripture or poem is not used twice. 

Memorial Candle Lighting

A beautiful way to remember important family members who have passed on is to have a memorial candle lighting ceremony at some point during your wedding.

Have a table set with a photo of each family member that you choose to remember in this way along with a candle for each. Choose family members to light each of the candles.

Be sure to explain this part of the ceremony in your programs, so that all of the guests will understand what is going on. 


Appointing family members or friends to serve as greeters will free up the ushers to concentrate on seating people and will also provide you with another way to include some of your friends and family members in your big day.

Assign someone to stand by the guest book, another to hand out programs and another to answer any questions that guests might have such as where the restrooms are located and where they should put cards and gifts.

Vendor Coordinator

Choosing someone to act as your vendor coordinator will relieve you of a little stress in the days just before your wedding.

The vendor coordinator will call each vendor a couple of days before the wedding. They will verify that final payment has been made and that the delivery times are correct. They will also be available the day of the wedding to troubleshoot and provide directions for lost vendors and help direct vendors once they arrive at the venue.

They will also serve as the wedding day point of contact so that the bride’s cell phone will not be ringing while she is getting her hair and makeup done. 

Cake Attendants

If the reception venue is not providing staff to serve your cake, assign a couple of people to be cake attendants. Their job will simply be to cut and plate the cake.  They will also make sure that the cake top is set aside and saved for you and your groom to enjoy on your first anniversary.

Because cutting a wedding cake is not exactly like cutting a sheet cake, be sure that the cake attendants know the proper way to cut a wedding cake. 


If your budget will allow, it would be a nice gesture to invite all who are helping in the above ways to the rehearsal dinner. This will show them that they are indeed an important part of your wedding and will let them feel they are a part of all of the activities.

You should also make note of each of them in the wedding program. You could list each position by name, or simply have a list of special helpers where all of their names would be listed.

It would also be a nice touch to buy them a small gift, just as you would for a member of your bridal party.

You certainly want to be sure that they are included in any pre-wedding festivities, such as bridal showers and the engagement party.

Having too many friends and family can be a wonderful problem to have. By assigning some of them to special wedding jobs as described above, you will be including as many of your loved ones as possible in your big day and will also take some of the pressure off you and your groom. 

Photo Credit:

Ryan Desiderio @ Flikr


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    • camdjohnston12 profile image

      camdjohnston12 6 years ago

      That's a great plan, Juliet. Thanks for sharing. I'll share it to my friends.

    • TheWeddingSecret profile image

      TheWeddingSecret 7 years ago from Bath, UK

      Great hub, really interesting, thank you!

    • JulietduPreez profile image

      JulietduPreez 7 years ago

      Thank you sjames4444 and Wedding Invitation Designs for your comments. Glad you found it useful ;)

    • profile image

      Wedding Invitation Designs 7 years ago

      Great ideas. I'd never considered these ideas to get them more involved in the wedding

    • sjames4444 profile image

      sjames4444 7 years ago

      Lots of good information.

    • JulietduPreez profile image

      JulietduPreez 7 years ago

      Thank you. Glad you found it interesting.

    • profile image

      kims3003 7 years ago

      Excellent hub with lots of great information and suggestions. Nicely put together and well written. A+!

    • JulietduPreez profile image

      JulietduPreez 7 years ago

      Pleasure ;)

    • SpiritLeo profile image

      SpiritLeo 7 years ago from Europe

      Lovely Hub! Thank you for sharing!