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When Good Friendships Turn to Betrayal

Updated on November 7, 2011

Disillusioned, disgusted, demoralized . . . All words to discribe how I feel now that I know I've experienced betrayal. Betrayed by whom? My friends. Well, at least that's who I thought they were. I recently heard a saying that fit so well - "You never know who your friends are until they prove to you that they are not."

I'm just one of those people who find it very hard to resist helping others in need. Until recently, I felt that was a good quality. I had a few close friends who were suffering with personal and financial problems (aren't we all in some way, shape, or form?). I had the means to offer my time, my resources, and my guidance to this group of individuals. When a difficult situation presented itself to our group, my friends not only abandoned me, they vehemently turned on me forgetting everything I had done to help them in their times of need. Wow, what a slap in the face? Now as a result, my life and my livelihood have changed - for the better or worse is yet to be seen.

Now, please don't get me wrong. I'm not entirely jaded regarding helping those in need; however, I have learned some valuable lessons that I would like to pass on to other giving souls like myself.

1. Be true to your values - if you feel the need to help others, do so. Just be aware that some people are very good at taking, but very poor at giving back.

2. Take off your blinders - just because a person is willing to accept help from you doesn't necessarily mean that they will be loyal to you.

3. Trust karma - what goes around comes around.

There will be times in all our lives when the people we surround ourselves with let us down. Don't let your big heart be broken by bad friends.


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    • joejagodensky profile image

      joejagodensky 6 years ago from Milwaukee, Wisconsin

      Your new self awareness will only serve you more faithfully in the future. Your generosity will not change, only your discernment about "how" to do it. Well presented, thanks.

    • NiaLee profile image

      NiaLee 6 years ago from BIG APPLE

      I am sorry for you at the same time it is better to learn now that you are still able to make better friends and solve your issues. I have been there and after a decade of the situation I realized that people were not good, decent or even trustworthy... they are some good people out there, make it your goal after healing to meet some and handle your relationship in a healthy way...sometimes remember to keep space outside and within yourself to make sure that you are on point and you see clearly...take care and enjoy being the great person you are and remember, they gave you a gift: the knowledge and experience that will serve you for a lifetime!

      You are blessed because my parents learned that in their 6os and I can assure you that after housing, taking loans and helping so many as soon as there was no more job and free ride, everybody got lost!

      Enjoy the years to come with a wise perspective!

      Love and peace on all.


    • Jayleenblogs profile image

      Jayleenblogs 6 years ago from Every day is a new beginning

      I suppose my greatest fear is that I will become less trusting of people. I'd hate to see that happen. I like people. With anything in life, though, we have to take chances. Fortunately, there will always be those tried and true friends who renew your faith in yourself and in humanity.

    • amymarie_5 profile image

      amymarie_5 6 years ago from Chicago IL

      I'm a lot like you. I have a big heart and always put other people before me. I've been burned so many times by people who I thought were my friends. As a result, I'm now less trusting of people. I think you have to be. We live in a society that is very selfish. People like us need to keep our guards up. I hope you are right about karma. :)

      I rated this up. I think many people will be able to relate to this.