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Should You Download Ebooks On Breakups?

Updated on November 28, 2016

When I was in my mid-twenties I broke up with a guy that I thought I could get back. Big mistake! One day I was surfing the Internet and saw and ebook that promised to help me win my lover back. Under normal circumstances I never would have fallen for such a gimic, but I thought for some remote reason reading this book would change things. So like a dodo I paid almost twenty dollars to download an ebook that basically told me play hard to get to get him back. How was this going to help? Basically he broke up with me and said he did not want to see me anymore, so how was playing hard to get going to change this? After reading the ebook I felt so silly and realized I had allowed my emotions to sucker me into paying for an ebook that told me nothing helpful. There are some good ebooks out there, but ones telling people how to attract love, win a lover back, or stop a divorce are preying on part of the population that is feeling desperate at the moment. These are not desperate people, but often they log onto the Internet after an argument and start searching for solace. In a rejected lover's moment of vulnerability they just happen upon an ebook that promising to fix everything. Is it going to help them to pay for an ebook that is all fluff? No, but it certaintly helps the publisher of the ebook, which is the exact reason people publish those type of books. Let me say it right now: you do not not want to win back your lover because if the relationship is broken there is a reason for it.

A painting that I made about love.  However, most breakups are not romantic, so you would be better off painting than getting back together with your ex.
A painting that I made about love. However, most breakups are not romantic, so you would be better off painting than getting back together with your ex.

So Why Do You Want Your Ex Back?

I think after a break up many of us miss are ex and want them back, but just think about why you want this. Maybe it is the hurt and the betryal of being broken up with that is making you feel this way, and not the person themselves. So before you go buy some program or ebook that promises to bring your ex back, just stop and think about why you want to be in a dysfunctional relationship like that. When people stop and think they will realize there were some times in their relationship that were not so perfect, but they are oh so caught up in the love haze to notice. Sometimes books from the library are the best source of inspiration for those who are down. The best perk this is free and will not cost you a dime.

Daring Chloe by Laura Jensen Walker is a fun novel for women going through a bad break up to read. It is not a serious self-help book, but often just reading something fun and inspirational can help. Actually I can really identify with Chloe because she is a bookworm like myself and she uses books to escape. Her boyfriend texts her on the wedding night to tell her he does not want to get married because it will not work, but she did not seem to notice he had not been happy.

As she is looking back on their relationship she is realizes her and Chris really did not have anything in common. At first Chloe is really mad at Chris's best friend Ryan, but the reader slowly realizes the he is a true gentleman. Chris whimped out and sent a break up text message, and Ryan was the guy there to pick up the pieces. At first every time Chloe sees Ryan at the bookstore she makes some not so nice comments towards him, who can blame her, but he takes it like a gentleman.

Slowly Chloe gets over her break-up and begins to get involved with her book club that starts going on trips each month to reenact the books they read. Chloe even surprises herself by going camping, which is something she never liked. Chloe even attempts to protects her friends when she thinks a bear is lunging on them during a hike. Luckily it turned out to be a dog, but the one thing Chloe learns is she does not need a man or a relationship to sustain herself.  The lesson to be learned from a book like this is instead of changing yourself to be with a man or a woman, stop and think about what you want in life. Personally I am sure you can get a lot more quality advice by reading a fun book such as Daring Chloe than from some deceptively packaged ebook.

The book It's Called A Breakup Because It's Broken is another great selection for people getting over a breakup. Once again you can check it out of the library, which is much cheaper than paying for some overpriced program or online psychic that promises to bring your lover back. The writers Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt share how they went through not so great relationships that ended in breakups. It hurt excruciatingly when their significant others broke up with them, and Greg even shares some of the humiliating times he called his ex begging her to take him back.

When Amiira and Greg met each other they knew it was meant to be, even though their relationship has problems like all relationships do. However, they no longer had to guess wheter their significant other still liked them. Greg's other book He's Just Not That Into You is a great read for women that are pondering why their boyfriend is acting distant. If your boyfriend does not call, or if he breaks up with you, there is a good chance he is not the one. Why would you waste your time on a person like this?

There are many ebooks out there that will charge you in the vicinity of five to forty dollars to tell you some things that are just getting your hopes up. If someone breaks up with you they did it because the relationship did not feel right, and begging them to come back is selling yourself short.

After I read these books I decided not to contact a couple of men who had broken up with me, and they emailed months later to ask why I never called anymore. Well, I guess it has something to do with the fact we broke up. Your time is too precious to waste on a relationship that is already over. Go out and meet some new people, or at least check out some fun books to read, but do not pine after your ex.


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    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 8 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Hi Nazishnasim,

      I do try to empathize with others. I am glad you enjoyed this hub!

    • profile image

      nazishnasim 8 years ago


      It feels as if you can empathize with everyone out there with a broken heart. Thankyou for such a great hub :). I am an instant fan :D.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Hi Abibakar,

      I simply do not want people to pay for overpriced ebooks that will not help. Checking out uplifting books at the library is free and much more helpful.

    • abibakar profile image

      abibakar 9 years ago

      Nice hub it can assists broken hearted people to get back on their feets.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Hi Pete,

      I know guys go through breaks ups too, but I am a woman, so that is the perspective I wrote from here.

    • Pete Maida profile image

      Pete Maida 9 years ago

      I agree that if one person wants out of a relationship then the relationship likely not worth saving. However, I don't think the ladies own this subject. Men also get shot down everyday. It is just not in me to make personal decisions based on advice from someone I never met.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Hi Hot Dorkage,

      I buy a few ebooks that are electronic versions of fiction stories I like, but I stopped buying books when I started working at a library.  Ebook writers are free to write whatever they desire, but I just like warn those feeling vulnerable after a breakup to reconsider buying something that will not help very much.  If they read hubs at least those are free, even many are slanted towards opinions also.  Nothing can be completely certain, and even highly editorialized text books have major errors.

    • hot dorkage profile image

      hot dorkage 9 years ago from Oregon, USA

      Ebooks, like hubs, are not vetted. Anyone can publish anything they want and make any claim they want. Sure they offer you a moneyback guarantee. If you read the fine print, what they actually guarantee is that this is the best info they know and that it might have worked for some situations, and they will deliver the ebook, but otherwise, YOUR RESULTS MAY VARY.

      Most Ebooks SUCK. I won't buy an ebook unless I get F2F recommendation from someone I know and trust, and who has provable results based strictly on the ebook and not on their situation. Say Joe, who is already doing good, buys the ebook and sees a 24% jump in business Maybe because of the ebook, maybe not. How is that going to help ME whos' trying to get a business launched.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Good points Violet Sun. I am guilty of having read several books on how to get an getting an ex back, but it never worked. We broke up for a reason, and sometimes it just takes time to learn compatibility is something we can never buy.

      Maybe some of the authors believe in the ebooks on breakups, but part of me thinks it is another marketing ploy.

    • VioletSun profile image

      VioletSun 9 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      When I was younger and foolish, I would try to win back more than one ex love, and course, it never worked. As one gets older and wiser, we learn, that relationships are not about silly psychological games but about both being compatible , having mutual respect and love, and everything flows from that foundation.

      You are so right... these books prey on the vulnerable, wonder if the author really "believes', in what they are writing, or its only for the money that the book is published. Just thinking.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Hi Frieda,

      I will admit a hubber was promoting yet another ebook on how to stop a breakup, so the thoughts just flowed from there.

    • Frieda Babbley profile image

      Frieda Babbley 9 years ago from Saint Louis, MO

      Absolutely, reguardless of whether you're a guy or a girl. Great article and well written.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Thanks for sharing mekoahh.

    • mekoahh profile image

      mekoahh 9 years ago

      Very interesting