- Gender and Relationships
Why do you need a good standard of living in your married life?
There were days when I felt that love is enough for my married life to be happy. I and my husband were more of friends and we treated our only daughter as our best companion. We were very rich in love but very poor in money. ‘We have love, nothing else matters’ I used to tell my husband. But I was again and again proved wrong when we were thrust aside by the money minded society as non- existent because of our lack of affluence.
Is not love the top criterion for a good marriage? It is! But can love alone make your marriage work? It definitely cannot! Love is a very personal emotion that binds you and your spouse together but you cannot buy a single thing with your love. It is your money that makes you survive in a world which has its eyes focused on the dollars you have.
Do you know your marriage struggles to survive when you have tons of love but no money? Your love for each other can make you psychologically fulfilled, but does not in any way help you to maintain a good standard of living.
What exactly is a good standard of living?
It is a sense of well being you feel when you have a good social status and enjoy the good things in life. Does it mean you have to throw your money around to keep pace with your more affluent friends\relatives\colleagues? No it is not like that at all! It just means that the way you live should not be too dowdy and drab. It should be good enough so that you do not feel completely overawed by the richness around you.
I know a couple who both earn well, but they are so miserly that they would not spend a dime to buy any good things for their family. I knew the wife and she would always boast that they had a big bank balance. What is the use of the unused money they had in the bank? She would not wear good clothes, their car was a joke and their children did not enjoy what the other less moneyed children enjoyed.
This is not the way to live. Of course you should be judicious in spending money, but you should also maintain a good standard of living. You should also maintain a status in the society by living in a way that you do not seem in abject need of the good materialistic things the world always sets a scale to notice you.
You might well say that you do not live for the world, but live for yourself! But your children feel deprived when you deny them the basic things they need to feel well cared. Of course they need your love, but they also need certain other materialistic things. They should not always be craving for what their friends enjoy!
What exactly is a good standard of living?
- You must have enough money to maintain your family.
- Your way of dressing should make you look well groomed.
- Your home should be well furnished in a tasteful way.
- Your electronic gadgets should not be too outdated but be updated within your budget.
Is it a tall order for you? No, it isn’t! You and your spouse earn together and you can afford it. But you can go all wrong if you compete with others. When you compare yourself with others and want to be equal with people who are way well off than you, you can drown yourself in debts and you have to struggle for years to come out of it.
Then how do I show a good standard of living if I should not try to be even with others? Life of others can never be a scale for you to maintain. Married life is very simple but complicated by you. You confuse a good standard of living as being lavish and throwing money around to make people notice you.
The other day I was shopping in a mall and stopped when I saw the family of my friend. They were a treat to watch. Husband and wife were dressed with good taste and their two children were neatly dressed and absolutely well behaved. The way they were attired gave a tasteful richness to their appearance. A small example of a good standard of living!
Your furniture need not be costly, but whatever furniture you choose should sync in design and color to make your home look rich. An ordinary coir mat can add classic glamor to your living room. Flowers in apt places give your home a colorful look. A neat and well maintained home is a good standard of living!
Do not buy dresses with the fashion trends in your mind as your dresses become outdated soon. Your dress need not be a costly one but select the ones which make you appear good. Your car can be small but when it is cleaned to a glassy polish its total effect is richness. The gadgets you select should be latest but in accordance with your budget.
Buying things with taste and maintaining it well is what good standard of living means. It elevates your spirits as you too enjoy the best materialistic things the world has to offer you. The dedicated love you have for each other combined with your well being makes you the envy of others.
© 2014 mathira