Is it a bad idea for a couple just getting to gether to have a roomate.

1. 51

   luv2reinposted 15 years ago

   Is it a bad idea for a couple just getting to gether to have a roomate.
   
   My boyfriend and I are going to start living together soon. We have been seeing eachother for 9 months in a LD relationship.  He has committed himself to having his daugthers gay partner to live with him until she finishes school. I think this is not a good idea because we are going to be learning all about eachother and an extra person in the house will cause friction not giving the relaionship a chance to progress.  Am I correct?

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2. 69

   Diane Insideposted 15 years ago

   I would say you are absolutely correct. It is a big step deciding to live with someone. And the first couple of years are the most crucial. When my husband first got together, we lived with each other for six months first. And when he brought it up to have one of his friends live with us, I refused. I did not want to put myself in that situation. Because there would inevitably be times when his friend would be home and my boyfriend at the time wouldn't. I didn't want there to be any doubt in his mind or anything. I would'nt even let my brother live with us because I thought we needed this time for ourselves.

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3. 0

   Duchess OBluntposted 15 years ago

   In my opinion your thoughts are bang on.  Any relationship requires work to make it work.  Why put extra obstacles in the way before it even begins?

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4. 70

   stricktlydatingposted 15 years ago

   It's not like it's a 'mate' living with him. His daughter comes first and he has already committed to his daughters partner living with him until she finnishes school.  I think you need to accept this committment he made, before you decide to move in with him.  It could cause extreme relationship and family problems if you don't agree to have his daughters partner live in the same house, it is likely to cause difficulty if you won't accept his wishes/other commitments.

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5. 52

   mologisticposted 14 years ago

   it takes two to make any relationship work. it also requires patience, understanding and commitment to make it last. The diversity of human nature naturally make it a tedious task to understand one's partner in any relationship. Your work and your partner's becomes not two-fold, but tripled, when this partnership becomes tripartite (you, your partner and the little girl). In essence, it may be wise for you to do all you can to reduce the emotional stress on you and your partner by find alternative accommodation for your partner's 'adopted daughter'.

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