Who Among You Has Dealt With The Female Teenager?
As I sit here and ask this question, I am positive I am not the only one who has been subject to crazy looks, one word answers, slammed doors, mood swings, silent treatments, closed doors, earphones in the ears as you are talking to them. Whew!!! That is just to name a few!
Let me know...from the age of 13 til now...she's 18. It has gotten a little better but not much.
I have a niece who is beginning all of this. The attitude face, for no reason. The OMG!!! All I can remember is, I wasn't this way as a teen-ager.
My daughter is now in her mid 20s and this sure brings back memories! Those teen years sure are a tough time also for mom and definitely calls for endurance. I truly feel for you. It's not easy at all, at least wasn't for me, to even try to ignore the moodiness and, yes, down right meanness. However, I am relieved and so glad to say all that is past now. She really did grow up into a lovely human being that I now miss, since she got married last year. (We do visit each other, but just saying I really like her now.) Hope you find all the encouragement you need at the current stage of things and grow in assurance that 'this will pass' and it will get much better.
I know every teen is different and the mood swings, I think, are just a part of that age group. But they need to control their responses to you. We would never allow them to give us looks or slam doors. If it happened, each and every time we called them on it--which takes a lot of energy and dedication :-)
If my child slammed a door, I would tell her one more time and the door will be taken off and put in the garage. Don't just say it, mean it and follow through. Earphones in the ears while you are trying to talk to her, then take them away. They have to understand the you are the parent and deserve respect.
If trouble started with one of our girls, we sat down and I told them - we don't treat you like that and we can't allow you to treat us like that. We made a real effort to keep things "up." I would ask her why she is frustrated with you and let her know it is hurtful and can't be allowed.
I really believe that ignoring it is not the answer, and that they can control it. They don't act that way with all people so that means it can be curbed if they want it to.
Good luck - these are hard years, I remember very clearly.
My daughter went thru similar from 14 til about 19, then became normal again. It's the age especially with girls. Good Luck!
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