Have you ever shed a tear after physically hurting someone?

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   Barnseyposted 11 years ago

   Have you ever shed a tear after physically hurting someone?
   
   If so what did you learn?

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   fosgingerposted 11 years ago

   yes, when I was 15 years old I had to hold down my brother, and when he wouldn't stay down I had to knock him out and pray he didn't wake up till the police got there. He was strung out on crack and they we escorting him to rehab. Hardest thing I ever had to do.

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   Blond Logicposted 11 years ago

   Yes I have. I was trying to get ready to go somewhere and my two year old, daughter, was constantly slamming a toilet seat down. The baby was crying in the other room and I 'lost it'. I used the back of a hairbrush and smack my daughter, once,  on the bottom to make her stop doing that. I sat down in the corner and cried, and she came up to me and told me she was sorry and asked why I was crying.
   
   I was suffering from post natal depression and my young female doctor put me on tablets for this. It was one of the worst times of my life. I thought I didn't need to stay on them and she asked if I had cried during the week, I would say yes and she would say, you aren't ready to come off of those yet.
   
   I was lucky I had such a modern doctor, because I know of other doctors who were in the same office who would have boohooed the idea and told me to 'pull my socks up and get on with it'.

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      freecampingaussieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Back when children were disciplined , smacked etc we grew up to be more respectful etc . Children these days are turning out to be uncontrolable because parents are not allowed to punish them .Its horrifying to see what they get away with now .

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   edmob1posted 11 years ago

   Often.But not for their pain for my lack of self control and sinking to such base methods of judgement.

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   nightwork4posted 11 years ago

   i kicked a soccer ball and hurt my 7 year old and i did shed a tear, i felt horrible even though we were playing and it was an accident. i've never once shed a tear after purposely hitting someone though.i have no problem using violence when it's needed and to me it makes perfect sense.

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   Silver Fishposted 11 years ago

   Have you Barnsey?
   An interesting question.
   
   I have never intentionally hurt anyone or smacked my children.
   Only rarely have I hurt someone accidentally, I nipped the top of my toddlers finger while trying to trim his nails, and I did feel very bad- but not as bad as if it had been intentional.

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      Lastheartposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Ouch!

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   mackyiposted 11 years ago

   Actually, I can't remember this ever happening to me. However, I have seen this happened to a few people I have known. For example, I remember while I was in high school, one of my classmates pulled the chair away, just as another boy was about to sit. The boy fell backwards hitting his butt, head, and back so hard, that he started to cry. Most of the other students were telling the boy that was responsible for hurting this poor boy that he was wicked. He felt so terrible that he himself started to cry. He must have apologized to this poor boy a hundred times or more for that day!

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   WD Curry 111posted 11 years ago

   
   
   Yes, when my daughter was two, she was playing  on the floor with some toys while I ironed a shirt for work. The phone rang, and I went across the room to answer it. I looked over, and little April was reaching towards the iron with her tiny little hand. I yelled, "NO!"
   
   She touched it anyway. It burned her entire palm. She screamed in shocked agony. I keep a spray bottle with fresh, pure water in it. That is the best way to treat a burn. I was crying the whole time. It was a man cry. Plenty of tears, but no noise. I didn't want April to lose confidence. I guess the burns were 2nd degree. She healed nicely.
   
   After that, if I said no, that girl would stop in her tracks. Too bad it wore off when she became a teenager.
   
   Here is a picture of her today. I taught her to eat right and get plenty of exercise.

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   Jynzlyposted 11 years ago

   Yes, cried real lot...My son was 6 years old and his front tooth was already very loose. I have phobia of tooth extraction in any form; my my ex husband was not home, I had to do it myself. I was "negotiating" with my son saying that if he would let me pull his tooth with the thread we would go to Jelo's Ice Cream, an ice cream bistro so popular with kids in those days. He agreed but cunningly he slowed down the negotiation with many questions and long talks to delay the actual extraction. It took us three hours in that talk which ended me beating him blue with a hanger. I was not able to report to school. I felt so bad because I realized that it was actually my own fear and indecisiveness to pull off his tooth that caused me to beat my son that bad. If my Mom was not there to pull my son away from me I could have done worst. My son came to me and hugged me and said sorry and promised that he won't cause me to cry anymore.

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      Barnseyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for answering honestly. We all have moments where we lose control. The key is that you recognized your error and the root of your explosion, without understanding there can be no control.

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      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      My son is now a millionaire with three children, of whom the eldest is a sophomore Architecture in the University. It was such a long time ago but I turn out to be a very successful mother in my own right.

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    landscapeartistposted 11 years ago

    Yes, I have.  I was 19, and we were playing baseball.  I was never any good at it and always sat on the bench watching, but this one day they said I was to play.  I went to bat the ball, figuring I would get a strike out cuz I was never any good and couldn't hit the broad side of a barn, I swung the bat as hard as I could.
    I hit the ball, and it went straight for the pitcher.  She was only about 10, and it got her square on the forehead.  She bawled, I cried, and her dad screamed at me.  It was an accident, but after that no one would leave their kids in the park if I was around. 
    I felt so bad and have hated the game ever since.  I play once in while with my son but I stay clear of actual game playing with anyone else.

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       That Grrlposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       That's awful. Poor you. I was always the kids who sat out at sports too. I'm glad nothing like this happened to me. It was enough always being last when we had to run around the track, at least that was just me.

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    Lastheartposted 11 years ago

    Have you ever shed a tear after physically hurting someone? If so what did you learn? asked Barnsey. I liked this question, and preferred to answer it with a hub. read more

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       Barnseyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       What a thoughtful and emotionally provoking answer! Hurrah, lastheart, well written!

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       Lastheartposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Thank you for an inspiring question.

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    That Grrlposted 11 years ago

    I can't think of the last time I physically hurt anyone. The only time I can remember feeling bad about hurting someone was when I accidentally scratched a retarded kid when we were at camp. I was a kid too but I had been angry with the kid. He kept following me around and yelling whatever came into his head. No matter what I did he wouldn't back off. I turned around to push him away but scratched his face instead.

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    Nell Roseposted 11 years ago

    The only time I deliberately hurt someone was when my son was about 15, he is a quiet lad, and he came home in floods of tears after a gang of older school kids beat him up through the alleyway near our house. He wasn't badly hurt so I left my son with my husband and went out to confront the thugs. They were 16, taller than me and strong. I went up to the leader and punched him in the face, he burst into tears and I said 'Now you know what it feels like you bully' I know he cried because he was embarrassed in front of his mates. I know I shouldn't have done it but I am only 5,2 in size so it was a fair punch! and no I didn't cry, in fact I laughed in his face. funnyily enough his mom and dad came round later, and they were even bigger bullies. The father was built like a brick, and threatened me with a baseball bat! I faced them down, told them off and sent them packing too. Only I used words this time and not violence. I am ashamed I did it to the boy, but not for him, for me as I shouldn't have sunk to his level. My son was never picked on by them again.

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       Blond Logicposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Some people will say  what you did was wrong, not me. Years ago, this bully's behavior wouldn't have been tolerated and the neighbors would have 'sorted out' the problem within their community. This is what happens if people just ignore it. Good on u

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       JKennyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Wow, well done Nell Rose I salute your courage.

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       Nell Roseposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Thanks guys, sometimes you just have to do it, afterwards I was a bit scared! but the adrenaline took me through the argument!

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    coffeegginmyriceposted 11 years ago

    I did and was heartily regretful and sorry after.  It was a physical fight with my brother when we were young. The punch reached my face and I ran my fingernails on his back trailing long and peeled scratch marks. My ma was screaming for help to separate us both from hurting each other more.  It was a horrible thing I had done, feeling awful than the punch on my cheekbone. But we were just growing up and siblings do fight. Papa advised him that boys should not punch girls and have respect for his older sister. And I had my share of advice too not to hurt my younger brother. Then we were sent to kneel in front of the altar facing the Virgin Mary for the longest period on our knees! And whenever pa was out of sight, we rested on our heels, then, back on our knees again (several times). 
    
    We learnt that physically hurting each other will not make you a better person and we never repeated a fight like that ever again.

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    Ciel Clarkposted 11 years ago

    I cried after I hit a guy over the head with a metal pole I normally used for opening my skylights. A creepy ex in college who did not agree to be an ex, and had broken into my house.  He had broken in twice, but this time he punched me and so I hit him on the head with the skylight pole and then called the police.  Luckily the pole was hollow and kind of bent on his head.  He did fall down and sat there until the police arrived and then he ran out and jumped off the back porch. 
    
    I did cry because I was so furious.  It still makes me enraged 20+ years later. 
    
    One of the best things I learned in self-defense classes afterwards was to just get out of the situation.  I should have just left the house.
    
    Besides getting hit, what also really still makes me mad is that when he broke in the previous time (I wasn't there) window glass fell into the cardboard box in the spare room where my cat and her kittens were-- and he just left it.  I'm glad I didn't really hurt him, but was happy I got a restraining order and even better-- called his mother.

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