I have had several one night stands, and a few of them have been from a bar that I frequented. I met them that night, and woke up with them in the morning. I'm not saying if something happened? I would tell anyways.
Because civility would be what you strive for and self-respect. To purpose go around and sleep with someone, just because you can, shows a lack of control over the sex drive and how ignorant one would be on understanding morals.
And, yes, I've had my share of them. Does that make me a hypocrite? No, because I didn't purposely go out of my way to make it happen.
Those who make their purpose to have only one-night stands are considered players and they do more damage than they are worth. Many women cannot have just a one-night stand, and those who do, are no better than the players.
People expect civility or a moral standard from everyone else. Yet, many don't even know how to be civilized to one another, much anything else.
Not to mention, you diseases? People like that are living a dangerous life. Especially in today's society.
Cags: My how judgemental! lol In my younger years, I looked forward to as many 1 night stands as I could get! Morality? BS! Every woman I "entertained," did it "consentually" and were as wild and horny as I was. Pls explain what, in your mind, "civility" has to do with 2 consenting adults doing what both want to do? Women are just as horny as we guys are and many of them love a wild, one nite ride on a "bucking bronco." I was looking for them and they were looking for me! The woman is in control! All a man has to do is be able to recognize which female he is attractive to and pursue them. To pursue the woman you want is folly. The woman "chooses," not the man. 2 people enjoying each other, even for just a night is wonderful!...and natural! I am not one who fights Mother Nature. She will always win!
SOP for a one night stand has always been. Be young dumb and drunk. Meet someone else who is the same. Wake up next morning and really can't remember what happend except you got laid. Get out before she wakes up.
You only do one night because that gives you the freedom to tell your friends how awesome it was without the fear of having the other person there to tell them that it really wasn't that great. And you stand in the men's room - classy.
Lyrics: When I was much younger and the testosterone was inundating every male cell in my body, my intent was to "bed" every willing young lady I met...:-) I found, contrary to what you express, that there were ladies out there who were as zealous in their attempts to be bedded as I was....and were perfectly delighted to orgasm as often as they could..then sleep, get up, shower, let me buy them brkfast, hug and kiss and wave goodbye....those were wild, wonderful, sexy, sweaty and orgasmic "one nighters" that we both absolutely loved. I look back at them now and get excited just thinking about the pleasure that the 2 of us brought to each other for a fleeting few hours... Isn't finding pleasure what lifes about? Of course! Neither of us had any regrets!...:-)
MY problem is I don't think I have bedded a woman who only wanted one night with me to be totally honest. I honestly go out of my way to make sure the lady is satisfied because that's just the way I am. I guess it's good in that I end up seeing women more than once and that cuts down on my chances of catching anything nasty but on the other hand, just because we make love doesn't mean I want to marry you either, ya know? Sure, I'm gonna make sure you're gonna wash my dirty face BUT do ya really want to put up with my idiosyncrasies for the next God-knows how many years!?
Phoenix: You, evidently, were not one who suffered a condition I named: "a walking hard-on." I don't believe in sex addiction, but I surely had a powerfull libido and an indescribable desire to satisfy it...:-) I found "ladies" out there who were 'suffering" just like me...lol...and they were not difficult to find.
Phoenix: I was not a "commitment" kinda guy. I was ruled by the "lesser" of my 2 heads. Hey, my actions harmed no one and both parties to the "party" left happy and satisfied. I look back and say.."hey, that was fantastic!" I'm none the worse for wear. 'Course my "libido" has been dimished by age and good sense. That was just a fun part of the "growing up" process. :-)
This thread brings mixed feelings. Hate thinking about that time so many years ago. Something about a one night stand that always makes me feel bad. During my single years, it happened a few times. And each time it happened, alcohol was involved and I had many regrets the next day, felt dirty, and hated myself. Had a few blackouts, too. Just remember flashes.....
I've never taken the sex act casually (except when drunk). It's just the type person I am. It is not a casual thing. Others feel differently and they can sleep with every person they date and have no remorse. I never could. In the later single years, while in my 30's, all my friends were sleeping with the guys they went out with. I just couldn't ...... I trusted nobody. Wonder of wonders I ever ended up married again. Just didn't wanna let those guards down, cause when I did, I always ended up getting hurt.
It boils down to this. You either can or can't handle it emotionally. I could not. Others can. One night stands? I'll chalk it up to a learning experience that caused much grief.
Donot: Hi. I'm sorry about the feelings of grief you feel. I never met a girl in a bar or a saloon. I don't drink..never have. I spent my young years as a lifeguard in both S Calif and Florida. I was a surfer, ocean swimmer and diver. I met all my "ladies" on the job and when involved with my hobbies at the beach wearing bathing suits. All my "soirees" were delightful and I have nothing but good memories about the fabulous ladies who shared my "one night stands." I still love the ladies..oh yes! :-)