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How To Get Rid Of An Wanted Guest (Pest)

Updated on June 22, 2013

Do You Have An Unwelcome Guest In Your Home?

At one time or another, we all have been a guest in someone's home or have had a guest in our own home. What kind of guest were you? What kind of guests have you invited into your home? You have only two answers to choose from:

Welcome guest or Unwelcome guest.

At first glance, the day of arrival it is difficult to distinguish between the two. However, as the days pass by it becomes easier to see and when departure day comes and goes, you will know for sure.

Let's look at each one a bit closer just to make certain.

Photo Credit : Allposters.com

I have a link at the end of this lens where you can purchase this tin sign.

Help

Which Way
Which Way

Have you ever been faced with this dilemma? What did you do?

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Hostess Gift
Hostess Gift

The Perfect Guest

The perfect guest is usually invited by the host or hostess. They have mutually discussed and made the necessary arrangements in advance. They have allowed enough time to prepare and allow for unforeseen circumstances. The day of arrival and departure are agreed upon in advance.

During the visit the guest demonstrates respect and appreciation by not taking advantage of the hospitality expressed by their host. For example, they adjust to the time schedule of the host by eating, sleeping, waking etc. accordingly. The guest knows they shouldn't take the comment, make yourself at home, too literally. They keep their room straightened and orderly. They offer to help with preparation and cleaning up after meals. Better yet they invite the host and hostess out for an evening as their guest. Making an excellent time to relax and enjoy each others company.

As departure time arrives, the guest shows appreciation by leaving their room clean and free of trash. They may even offer to change the linens. The idea is to leave things as nice as you found them. Another nice gesture of the guest is to show gratitude by leaving a thank you note and perhaps a small gift for their host.

The perfect guest will always be welcome to return if these simple guidelines are followed.

Photo Credit : marthastewart.com

What's That Smell?
What's That Smell?

The Perfect Pest

"Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days." Benjamin Franklin

The perfect pest does not arrive in this form but gradually begins to change from guest to pest as time goes on. I don't think it is necessarily done with intention but it can happen none the less.

Due to whatever reason the guest arrives without notice and you might feel obligated to open your home. At this point you could graciously recommend a nearby motel and explain it's just not a good time for you to have guests. The other option is of course to invite them to stay for a few days. This is often the point of no return. The boundaries were not established before their arrival and can become very unclear. To establish some boundaries it is your responsibility as the host or hostess to openly communicate your expectations and limitations to the guest. In the guest's defense, they can not read your mind and if left to their own assumptions, they will not meet your expectations.

At first the issues may be small but as time passes the list of problems will grow. The guest has become the pest. It could be that the television is too loud or may even include something as ridiculous as how your guest/pest breathes. You seriously wonder if the guest/pest will ever leave. You want your home back. You want your life back.

The best answer is straight forward communication. It is far better to be honest and open when communicating than to play emotional games. The emotional type games, scheming or plotting will only hurt you and your guest in the long run. The issues aren't important at this point. Make your conversation about a date for them to depart.

Bless your guest and their future as you say good-by upon their departure.

Photo Credit : jimfield.co.uk

What You May Want To Do - But Please Don't

1. Hint Hint : Wow! Can you believe you have been here 3 weeks?

2. Don't include them in activities. In fact, just leave without a goodbye or telling them your agenda.

3. Quit being hospitable, making meals for them asking if they need anything

4. If they help around the house ignore it you didn't hire them as a live in maid

5. Ignore them, cut conversations short with a simple Uh Huh

6. Text or play games on your phone.

7. Reclaim your space move your son or daughter back into his room.

8. Put their suitcases by the door.

9. Drive them to a shelter.

Last straw : Get police escort.

Let's Talk About It First
Let's Talk About It First

What To Do First

Let's Talk About It

Please remember each situation is different. In most situations the guest is likely to be a family member or good friend. If they have over stayed their welcome, it could be due to some personal problems.

Are they having problems at home? Are they having trouble in school? Are they having trouble with work?

You may be their last hope so again the answer may just be some good communication. Communication like love builds hope and mends hearts.

Hopefully the situation can be solved quickly and you will helped them to a fresh start.

Remember family and friends are forever.

Do as you would want done to you.

I Got The Hint

Have no fear, I got the hint. Extreme gratitude and thanksgiving to you and your family for helping me in the worst moment of my life. It is time for me to move forward to my next moment good or bad. I'm learning to accept the saying, It is what it is.

I may be homeless for awhile, but I can look forward to the day that I can help someone else with their needs. My desire is to help is not just to repay my debt but to do the right thing.

Please quit looking down on people in need. Their suffering is real and not necessarily the result of their past actions. You do not know their heart, their journey or their past. Please quit judging.

When It Is All Said And Done

No Vacancy Photo from Alicia
No Vacancy Photo from Alicia

When it is all said and done and you want to reclaim your home as your own, you may want to hang out a No Vacancy sign.

I suppose one can view this topic as funny but it can be quite serious as people we know and love are usually involved. What ever the outcome of events, give yourself a rest. Let the dust settle before opening up your home and your life to a visitor. As time heals all wounds even this situation can be forgiven and forgotten. Remember every situation can be a learning experience.

Who knows, one day you may come together again and laugh about it.

Your Thoughts - Your Experiences

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    • profile image

      FlynnTheFineFle 

      5 years ago

      Very nice. I doubt anyone would want to stay with my wife and myself in our one-room apartment, but it never hurts to be prepared for this sort of thing anyway. I like your mentioning communication. Life is so much simpler when people are just open and honest.

    • NibsyNell profile image

      NibsyNell 

      5 years ago

      Thankfully this hasn't happened to me yet. I love the 'no vacancy' sign! :)

    • profile image

      anonymous 

      5 years ago

      It is sad when you get to the point where you have to actually ASK someone to leave. It does make you think about your own behavior when visiting others. I think some people just don't THINK. Our home really is our castle, and when someone else invades it, we want to reclaim it.

    • profile image

      anonymous 

      5 years ago

      It is sad when you get to the point where you have to actually ASK someone to leave. It does make you think about your own behavior when visiting others. I think some people just don't THINK. Our home really is our castle, and when someone else invades it, we want to reclaim it.

    • profile image

      travelerme 

      5 years ago

      I like your hints

    • justmelucy profile imageAUTHOR

      justmelucy 

      5 years ago

      @Virginia Allain: Thank you for your comment and blessing. It is a delicate subject hopefully few find themselves in this dilemma. If they do and when it is all said and done, I hope the hostess and the guest will be able to smile and laugh about it one day.

    • Virginia Allain profile image

      Virginia Allain 

      5 years ago from Central Florida

      A touchy subject but you handled it well, showing both sides of the guest/host relationship.

    • justmelucy profile imageAUTHOR

      justmelucy 

      5 years ago

      @hntrssthmpsn: Thank you for the well said comment. It's a difficult place to be in. Hopefully, we learn and move forward with experience.

    • hntrssthmpsn profile image

      hntrssthmpsn 

      5 years ago

      I've lived with both the Perfect Guest and the Perfect Pest... sometimes, they've been the same person! It's hard to be a perfect guest, or a perfect anything, when your life feels derailed. Anyone in that situation deserves sympathy and a helping hand from friends and family... to a point! If we let a troublesome guest derail our OWN life... we're no good to anyone!

    • profile image

      olmpal 

      5 years ago

      In my opinion being open may be difficult but is the best thing to do.

    • justmelucy profile imageAUTHOR

      justmelucy 

      5 years ago

      @norma-holt: Why yes it is me. I have left an abusive situation and have had family helping me along. But now it is time to test my wings. I will visit your bio and contact you. Thank you for the kind offer. Thanks for Hug. I haven't been physically hugged in so long.

    • profile image

      webscan 

      5 years ago

      I used to have such people in office too. So I put up a rude sign on my desk. They spot it and complement me on having composed it. They dunno it is aimed at them. So I weep once more.

    • norma-holt profile image

      norma-holt 

      5 years ago

      It seems to me that you are speaking from experience here. I sense that you are in some kind of situation that you need to escape from. Are you the unwanted guest trying to figure out what to do next? If I can be of help send me an email. Hugs

    • justmelucy profile imageAUTHOR

      justmelucy 

      5 years ago

      @webscan: Good one I must say. I guess both of us don't like to hurt others.

    • justmelucy profile imageAUTHOR

      justmelucy 

      5 years ago

      @Lee Hansen: Thank you for liking my lens. I hope anyone preparing for guests through the holiday season, which will be here before we know it, reads my lens.

    • Lee Hansen profile image

      Lee Hansen 

      5 years ago from Vermont

      @SteveKaye: Good and reasonable ideas.

    • tvyps profile image

      Teri Villars 

      6 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      Reminds me of an old Saturday Night Live commercial skit from the late 70's with Belushi called "The Thing that Wouldn't Leave." I think it is on Youtube somewhere. Belushi

    • profile image

      SteveKaye 

      6 years ago

      I'll add to the above list: 1) State the truth. It might sound like, "This visit has become uncomfortable for us. So it's time to leave. How soon can you be packed?"

      If necessary, I'd buy a night in a nearby inexpensive hotel.

    • sukkran trichy profile image

      sukkran trichy 

      6 years ago from Trichy/Tamil Nadu

      interesting tips here. don't have any experience with unwelcome guest. thanks for a nice read.

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