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He doesn’t like me, or does he? How can I make him like me more? Does he love me? Do you think he finds me attractive?

Updated on April 4, 2011

He doesn’t like me, or does he? How can I make him like me more? Does he love me? Do you think he finds me attractive? How can I be attractive to him? Okay ladies, this one is for you….

I have spent some time helping others, and the questions asked above are the most frequently asked questions that women seemed to ask me. You wouldn’t believe the amount of times women asked me these questions. As a matter of fact, I got asked those questions so much, it affected me for a little while. I briefly stopped helping others. Those questions kind of saddened me. The point in me writing this is to answer those common questions, for all women, with hopes that it will help someone.

If someone doesn’t find you attractive

You are who you are, if someone doesn’t find you attractive, or doesn’t like you, move on. You are not going to “make” anyone like you more or any less. A person will form an opinion of you the second they see you. As a matter of fact, you may actually look less attractive in someone’s eyes if you try too hard. This is a cold hard fact. You should just live your life, and be happy being yourself. Trying to please everyone is not going to work.

You are a valuable person. Some people will like you, and others will not. It happens to all of us. Not everyone is going to like us. Spend your energy with those that do like you. You will find that this one little trick will not only make you happier, but it will bring up your value, and actually increase your likability.

Sure it is somewhat of a natural built in instinct in women to want to be sociable, and likeable; actually it is something all social creatures crave (people). However, realize that everyone has their own taste, as you do. Accept things for what they really are.

If you really want to become more attractive, do it in a way that you are not lowering your standards:

Do not lower your standards EVER

Okay ladies, some of you have come to me with this question: Do you think I should sleep with him? It has only been a couple of weeks. If you sleep with him, and you do not know him, you will not gain any respect. Someone cherishes something more if they have to work for it. If you are asking that question, chances are that it really is too soon. When you are in doubt, don’t do it.

Think about it. You have a choice, a candy bar, or a piece of the finest rare chocolate in the world; which one are you going to choose? Most people will choose the finest rare chocolate. Why? They can get the candy bar every day in the store. However, they cannot get a rare piece of chocolate every day.

This same thing applies to people. Always remember, you are a valuable person, you should see yourself as such. You are not going to lose him if you don’t give it up. If you do lose him because you didn’t give it up, you didn’t need him anyway. You do not really want that type of person in your life.

Those oshy goshsy feelings are going to disappear

Let’s say you are feeling all oshy goshy for someone. You think you should marry him. If you only knew him for a month, be careful with this one ladies. Some people have had success, while others have not. It is important to get to know someone very well before you make this decision.

Your ooshy gooshy feelings are just a stage. This is a stage in a relationship that will trick you into making a commitment, sometimes faster than what you should. What you need to do when this happens, is let your logic do the talking. After all, a year or two down the road, if you get stuck with someone that you do not feel ooshy gooshy about, you want to make sure you truly love him.

The ooshy Goosy feeling also applies to cheating

Some people consider cheating, because they do not feel so ooshy gooshy about the person they are with. Remember this before you decide to cheat: the feeling you have with the one you want to cheat on your partner with will fade. You should think long and hard about doing this in any relationship. Why would you throw away all of the hard work you have in the current relationship with someone, for someone else? You are going to have to put hard work into another relationship, after all the ooshy gooshy goes away. Why start a cycle?

How can I “make” him love me?

In my opinion, this is the saddest question someone has ever asked me. Why on earth would someone not realize they are valuable as a person? Ladies, if he does, he does. If he doesn’t, you deserve someone that really does love you.

You are a valuable person, you are deserving of true love. You cannot make anyone love you any more or any less. My only advice here is to stay real. Do not mask who you are, as a person. It actually happens more often than not.

If you do mask who you are, then that person will not love you for you, they will love who ever you are portraying to be. Why not make sure he really loves you for you? You do not want to have someone wake up, years into the relationship, and think, “I really do not love her.” This usually happens when one party in the relationship was not real from the get go.

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