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Being Single Doesn't Mean You Are Alone! It Means GOD is Omnipresent

Updated on September 26, 2015

Jesus my emotional miracle

I am beginning with a little background about myself. I was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York. In 1988 I relocated to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, where I am now residing. The Lord called me in 1980 while I was in a relationship, which was heading nowhere. I was often saddened by the fact that the person I was in that relationship with was no longer sure about getting married. I was confused about life and not in a good place at all. I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior and Lord and began my walk with Him. Jesus showing up during this time was the ointment that my life needed and it was an emotional miracle.

The Lord is Present

Our reality is not confined to what science can touch and measure. When we get saved our reality expands and becomes aware and sensitive that there is a realm called spirit; and that it is moving, doing and active around us. We can't see it with our natural eyes, we can only perceive it with spiritual perception and discernment. Once you embrace this truth and live in it, you never feel alone. You live in constant awareness that God is present with you, and you don't need something physical and tangible to happen to convince you, because there is something deep and profound inside of you, deeply rooted and planted by God which sensitizes you that He is there no matter what you are going through, that you will never again experience it alone. He is Jehovah Shammath (The Lord is Present).

Exclusivity to God fills the void in the heart

I am a single woman, I have never been married, and have no children, but I am never alone. I see singleness as a call to be an individual, unique and rare. My identity is centered in Jesus Christ. Christ in me the hope of glory. We are fearfully and wonderfully made, marvelous are God’s works and my soul is a living witness. Singleness encompasses a lot of things. It is my call by God to seek Him as an individual.

Although, even with a mate I will still be an individual, seeing that only my status would change but my individuality would not. I would no longer be of a single status, but rather joined to another individual and the two of us would become one spirit. The individual status really doesn’t change. A man will always be a man, and a woman will always be a woman as in the case of individual status. We would always be two individual people, because I can never be a man and he can never be a woman according to the flesh. In Christ we would become one with Him in spirit.

On an overall scale I see singleness as a blessing. It has been and is a time for preparation of my life for what God has purposed in and through it. It is how I use the time and how I am currently using it that counts. It is a time for me to become intertwined with my God. I don’t believe I can effectively intertwine with a mate without first building a lasting relationship with the Lord. God instituted the ordinance of marriage and He must be allowed to rule over that which He created.

The exclusivity that God purposed for marriage is pure and clean. He purposed that a man be exclusive and the only one for a woman, and vice-versa. Because of sin the purpose of marriage has been lost, just as the world system has become lost in not adhering to God’s precepts for marriage. I believe that God is the only one who can provide what a marriage needs to succeed. Just as I believe that only God can supply what singleness demands.

No one can reach the secret place

Singleness is a life of separation. I would admonish anyone to consider the cost. It will cost you in terms of understanding and coming into agreement with what it stresses. Celibacy is a demand not an option. I have operated in singleness also according to the world’s dictates; however, there is a drastic and distinct difference in contrast. Physical marriage is by the design of God a picture for the spiritual marriage or union of the Bridegroom (Jesus Christ) to His beloved bride (The Church). Singleness has allowed me to see and receive this higher revelation of marriage without actually experiencing it.

Singleness allows me the time to grasp the manner in which marriage should operate and it enables me to see from a biblical perspective, how a man is called to love his wife, as Christ loves the Church and how the Church loves and submits to Jesus Christ. Singleness helps me to determine the why of singleness.Although I am single, I am never alone.

Singleness has helped me to see that exclusivity to God is really my heart’s desire. The heart of the matter is that God intended that each man and woman who would desire marriage be virgins, untouched by any other person that is what exclusivity is. However, there is an untouchable place in each and every one of us. There is a place in my single heartedness which I identify as a place that I have reserved exclusively just for God, it a private place; it is a place that no one can enter or touch but Him. Exclusivity in our lives is solely a place where only God can dwell.

Man nor woman, father nor mother, sister nor brother, daughter nor son, nor any other family member, friend or others, can’t even find their way to the secret place of the heart, where you go to meet with God and He comes to dwell with you. It is a place of the spirit, where you build your own altar to God and no other person can offer any sacrifices there, because it is an exclusive place. You are the only one besides the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. I don’t believe that anyone can reach the exclusive place that God can in my heart because they can never be God. It is a restricted area that I have chosen that only God can dwell. It is a choice that I have made for myself, absolutely based on His choice of me. He chose us, it is here that we then respond, Yes Lord, I choose you too.

The Most Holy Place

In (Exodus 28), we read about Aaron being called from among the children of Israel to minister in the office of a Priest. The orchestration of God is magnificent and so very orderly. If you read this account, I know you will marvel at the instruction that God gave for Aaron’s garments, the tabernacle, ark of covenant and all the things which were necessary for constructing things as God laid it out in His blueprint. We too are called a royal priesthood, because of Jesus Christ. We can approach the throne of God by and through the blood of Christ. It is personal and wonderful.The place that others occupy in our hearts is not the same, as the place we prepare for God, the place of others emanates, from that secret place. LIKEN TO THIS STORY THERE HAS TO BE A DISTINCTION BETWEEN THE MOST HOLY PLACE AND THE HOLY PLACE.

The most holy place in us is for the Godhead alone. I encourage you to reserve a secret place exclusively just for God, you will never be the same. The exclusive place is where you go to love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. I can’t go there for you and you can’t go there for me. It is a covert place that only exists because of God and is only manifested for His presence only. The Creator is brilliant in His design of everything. Innumerable is the count as it pertains to people who exist and yet in each of us is a secret place ready to be occupied by God Himself. There is no vacancy sign on the door of our spirits when we choose to reserve that special place for God alone. It is strictly an internal or inner venue.

The unique thing about the secret place is that unlike a natural place where you can knock on the door and someone opens it, you are the only one that can open the door to your heart and when you do, God can take up residency there because you have chosen it. Exclusivity is a place where peace can dwell supremely and serenely.

Only in His presence have I ever experienced true freedom. Sin can’t follow me, because evil can’t stand in His presence, it is weakened and shrinks. It is a quiet place of rest. I encourage you to build yourself an altar between you and God. The place you go to pray, to seek Him and to repent and be forgiven for every trespass.

Webster defines single as whole, unbroken, and select from one another, separate and distinct. Singleness teaches me every day how I must love God and loving Him teaches me how to love others. Singleness is a teacher, I’m sure marriage is also. Singleness is a state, which characterizes a person or thing. It is not a state to retire to without first considering the cost. It may mean that you will not marry or you will just have to wait. I am not resigning to singleness; I am merely embracing the state I am in.

Singleness is not a Curse

The Apostle Paul declared that he had learned to be content no matter what state he was in. He embraced the grace of God as being sufficient. I can relate to that so well, because it is something that you have to do. Being content has a lot to do with being thankful and grateful. I don’t think the success rate of being content without being grateful is realistic, because they go hand in hand. Learning to be content is something I am still being taught how to do.

Many strongholds had to be torn down, imaginations cast down, many mistakes have been made, many disappointments have come my way, but bless God I am learning and will endeavor to be teachable. I had to experience loneliness in order to believe that I am never alone, because Jesus promises that He would be with me until the end of the age, never to leave nor forsake me, and that He is a friend that sticks closer than any brother.

There is nothing that I have experienced or had to endure in this life that is without significance to me. Through my single passage I have received hidden treasures, which only temporarily veiled what was to be found. I ask myself this question, why am I single? I am single because that is merely the state that I am presently in. I am single to siege every opportunity in which I can draw nigh to God and have Him draw nigh to me so that He becomes my all and all and that I learn to interlink with His will.

I am single to learn how to develop a single heart toward God. This endeavor involves being taught how not to be distracted or have my attention divided. Life is full of mass distractions. When I have to focus I should do it with single vision. Keep my eyes on Jesus. I am single to learn discipline; a disciple is one who is being taught. Jesus constantly taught the disciples how to live a disciplined life through all the parables. I am single to acquire a single eye and have a solitary focus, to look up, which is a prerequisite and central in exercising my energies to daily look unto Jesus the author and finisher of my faith.

I am single to be an encouragement to others who are and will have to take the single pathway in life. Be encouraged, single woman and single man, and allow Jesus to be Lord over your singleness. We have two eyes, yet one eye doesn’t look to the left and the other to the right. Whatever we endeavor to do in Christ should be done through singleness, even if you are married. When I behold a rose, I have to look at it with both my eyes to capture the brilliance of it. God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are one; if you have seen the Son, then you are looking at a replica of the Father.

I am single to develop a single mind with only one aim or purpose and that is to please God. Conformity into the image of His dear Son is my ultimate goal. Singleness that I can experientially live now. My true identity is hidden with God in Christ; apart from Jesus, I have no identity that has any lasting value. I desire to be the woman that He ordained me to be. I have no other ultimate purpose because on this solid foundational truth I am set free. I receive the revelation that God created all things for His purpose. I am still learning and asking for wisdom in how to walk in His will. (James 1:8) emphasizes that double mindedness leads to instability. I am seeking balance, not the instability that comes with double-mindedness.

You are not single at all, you are in a relationship with Jesus
You are not single at all, you are in a relationship with Jesus

A long distance relationship

I shared this article on another site prior to being part of hubpages. There were comments posted, some unfavorable, but one dear heart, sent a comment which flowed like poetry.

These are his exact words:

You are not "single"

You are on a date with Jesus,

It may be a "long distance relationship"

But, it is one you chose,

No reason to be upset that many folks

Already consider you taken,

Whatever path you've chose for your life

Accept it!

You're doing fine,

You aren't "single" at all

You're in a relationship with Jesus.

Isn't that truly beautiful, it defines Christian singleness, you are in a relationship with Jesus.

Live Pure - Be a Vessel of Honor

I find ultimate contentment in being single 99 percent of the time, only because of my relationship with God. The other 1 percent of the time, I experience the loneliness and restlessness that singleness can bring if I allow it to. It is those little foxes that spoil the vine. 99 percent is a good average, yet that little ole 1 percent can be a menace. Singleness lived under the authority of Christ and the keeping power of the Holy Ghost will produce a vessel of honor unto God, fit for His use to pour out into the lives of other single Christians, that waiting is worth the energy and effort you ensue.

Loneliness can be a dictator if you allow it to be. It can enslave you to perceive singleness as an affliction rather than merely a status. There are times that singleness feels like an affliction, like an incurable problem, or even like a curse. Yet I refuse to see it as an affliction, problem or curse because singleness has tremendously blessed me to seek my God. It has been my road to a relationship with God.

Singleness constantly teaches me how and why a personal relationship with God is and should always be an emphatic. I strongly believe that before I can ever be in a successful relationship with a mate or with others that my relationship with God has to precede every attempt. My stance is to exalt God as I go through this single endeavor; therefore, I can live a triumphant single life, because I choose to magnify God over the single status. He is greater than the status of singleness and fills it with peace. My desire is marriage, but singleness is my current reality, and I have learned to be content in this state of singleness and to be ever cognizant and aware that I am never alone. I know this is every single individual's reality as well. May God keep you strong.

Pray With Me

Heavenly Father,

I thank You for singleness and all that it may entail along this life’s journey. I pray for all those who struggle with being single, who ask the question “Why am I single?” Grant them the peace, grace, and patience needed to prosper in this state and the power to be content. I ask that You would give them revelation that pertains only to them personally and draw them into the secret place that is only Your dwelling place exclusively within them, that they would open that door and let You into their singleness.



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    • profile image


      6 months ago

      Great article.

      The secret place is the "place to be"

      Anything "physical" outside that place will always feel empty and meaningless, because God is the one who fills the void in the secret place.

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      2 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Good evening, Lantokey:

      Rejection is a hard one to bear. Let's look higher than usual. How do you think the Creator of the universe feels. He created the world we live in and has placed every provision we can ever need. Yet we have, or we do reject Him as Creator and have our own way of saying stay away and out of our lives. Is being accepted by who probably can't accept themselves really more important than being accepted by God? I know that road you are on very well and the rejection and the thoughts of suicide. One day I was interrupted by a verse of Scripture on my way to work. John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life".

      Receive the pure love of God (Jesus Christ) and the lust will leave. Love is greater than the lust this temptress represents. It shows up because you are looking for love in the wrong places. God is love and love will never fail. Grace and peace

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Good evening, Jennifer. You and I both, and there are myriads of others as well. The good news is that it is never too late. I am glad to hear that you are teaching these things to your children, because they will need all the information they can acquire to make decisions that count. Thanks for dropping in and have a great evening.

    • Jennifer Chancey profile image

      Jennifer Chancey 

      3 years ago from Columbus, Ohio

      I wish that I had waited much longer when I was younger, I would have avoided a lot of heartache. I am teaching these things to my children.

    • word55 profile image

      Al Wordlaw 

      3 years ago from Chicago

      Wonderful mabelhenry and we're very much in agreement because this is similar to a hub that I did a while back. Glad we're on the same page of faith!

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      RealTruth.....I wish you God's will over this new union and I hope it works out for you. Good things always come to those who wait. Grace and peace.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      To Mabelhenry, i finally met a very nice woman that i am very happy to say which i really hope it works out for me since i waited so long. Peace.

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Well RealTruth, I don't believe anyone desires or wants to be alone. It just happens. However, what is the option? Go commit fornication, and adultery and other acts that lead nowhere, or trust God? It is by obeying God's Word which clearly informs us what these lifestyles lead to, that we can choose to wait until the right person comes along. Adding God to the equation of singleness is the only profitable decision in the long run.

      Look at the world, do you think it is worth it not to exercise discretion or not to make the right value call? It is more of what place does morality hold in your life. It is your decision, none the less. While we wait we need keeping power only God can give us. Have a wonderful week!

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      To Mabelhenry, who would ever want to be single since it is really sad to be all Alone all the time? Not me. Many of us good men that are still single today, aren't single by choice that is for sure.

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Hi RealTruth: Where did you get the notion that singleness is punishment from God? God doesn't punish us, He preserves us to live the right way until the need is met. Singleness is a path, it is not something to retire to. If it is your desire for a wife and family, why don't you just ask Him for it?

      Loneliness can be a dictator if you allow it to be. It can enslave you to perceive singleness as an affliction rather than merely a status. There are times that singleness feels like an affliction, like an incurable problem, or even like a curse. Yet you must refuse to see it as an affliction, problem or curse because singleness can tremendously be a blessing while you wait on your blessing. Singleness is a road to a relationship with God. While you look, pray for what you desire and you will find that special person tailored just for you. Be encouraged! Have a good week.

    • profile image


      4 years ago

      God certainly does Punish many of us with Singleness, especially when i see so many others that were very Blessed to have a wife and family. Hey God what about us good men that are still looking?

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      4 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Praise God, "MsDora" How are you doing? I hope all is well with you and your family. Have you always hubbed from the Caribbean or are you visiting? Thank you for commenting. We all have to learn to respect established boundaries and singleness in Christ Jesus is a great teacher. Marriage is honorable and no one should try to dishonor it. One must determine to know how to live a single life and be content until given their own spouse, but it takes the standards that only God can provide. Thank you for stopping by and visiting. Enjoy the rest of the week in the sunny Caribbean.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      4 years ago from The Caribbean

      A very spiritual insight from a single-and-satisfied woman. You make great observations that other single women will do well to consider. Thanks for sharing your single experience.

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Be encouraged Marvin. Women that desire to be concubines are out of the will of God. In today's world a concubine is a fornicator or adulteress and we are exhorted by scripture to flee fornication, and not to commit adultery this grants us the moral fiber and guidance for the path of singleness. There are many reasons why everyman and woman don't experience marriage and a single passage becomes reality. Prayer for a mate would be a starting point and learning how to wait would be another if you really desire that proverbial Eve.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      God was and is omnipresent. God also made Eve so Man would not be lonely. I suspect the reason that a lot of us, especially those over 50, are still alone is more related to feminism. I live in a world where more women want to be concubines than want to be wives.

    • mabelhenry profile imageAUTHOR


      5 years ago from Harrisburlg, Pennsylvania

      Good afternoon, "RomeosQuill" how are you doing today? Thank you for dropping in to hubpapges all the way from England. Wow! I thank you also for all of your kind words and like of the article. I love Jesus and He fills my heart with such wonder. Being single takes perseverance once you identify that it is not an easy fix, you learn to forebear to be in alignment with the Word of God, by the power of the Holy Spirit. Until our next hubisode, have a great day.

    • Romeos Quill profile image

      Romeos Quill 

      5 years ago from Lincolnshire, England

      Hi mabelhenry!

      Whoa! Such an engrossing article, packed with a vast array of amazing details.You have such a fascinating biography so far, with a great testimony to tell;such a learned, wise, and lovely woman, with such fine credentials, exemplary attitude, all based on a sure, and firm foundation! You seem to be very focused upon your goal, and are steadfast, and that is indeed very encouraging for others as well, who may read this, as I was.You would certainly, if you so chose, make a very fine wife, and mother, if there would be a man deemed worthy to do so.

      Have a wonderful day,

      Peace and goodwill;

      Romeo's Quill


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