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To Forgive Is To Heal

Updated on October 23, 2010

Forgiving Those On the Other Side ...

My client Kelly sat in my office, full of anger, resentment and unforgiveness. The heavy energy was all around her, almost in a physical sense. These feelings had been brewing within her for many years;  since childhood, 30 odd years now.  She knew these feeling were hindering her from moving forward and were doing her more damage than any good.

Her deceased father was sitting next to her on the couch, presentingbehind Kelly’s *right shoulder, (*see endnotes)trying in vain to get her attention.  Kelly was aware of her father’s presence but was unable to hear or see him.  Part of her didn’t want to. Refused to.

I asked her to relax and focus on the crystal on the table in front of her.  I did this not because of anything to do with the crystal, but rather, to focus her attention on one thing, dispelling the monkey-chatter in her thinking, logical mind.

Once Kelly was calm I began hearing a male voice repeatedly saying “please forgive me.  I love you.  I love you.  I’m so sorry.  Please forgive me.”

I repeated the messages to Kelly as they came through.  Tears spontaneously streamed down her cheeks, but she didn’t say a word.  She sat with her arms crossed; rigid and tense.

Again the message repeated.

All of a sudden Kelly exploded on the spot; all red in the face, hissing and spitting like a wet cat.

I sat back and waited for her to recover to a point where she could speak.

Kelly expressed that she sincerely wanted to forgive her father for all that had taken place in her childhood  -  but a big part of her felt that in forgiving him she would be condoning his actions; and this she couldn’t bare.

I explained to Kelly that her longstanding resentment towards her father interfered with her desire to fully release all her emotional baggage.  Kelly expressed that as much as she wished to forgive her father, she didn’t believe that she really, truly could.  Kelly grappled with this for some time.

The energy in the room changed suddenly and I became aware that a second entity had entered the room and joined our consultation. This spirit appeared behind Kelly’s *right shoulder, a step or so behind her father’s energy, indicating an energy from a generation back, the placement showing where he stood in the family tree.

I described this second entity to Kelly who immediately recognized it to be that of her late grandfather.  Her father’s father. She hadn’t really known him in life as she was quite young when he died, but she’d seen photos of him and remembered her mother speaking of him saying he’d been a harsh and strict man;  a drinker with a temper.  He was someone the family had feared, yet revered.

I began telling Kelly what her grandfather was attempting to express.  Initially he sounded kind of static, pixilated in a way, but his message became clearer as his energy broadened and strengthened.

“It’s my fault.  I caused it.  It’s me who needs to ask for your forgiveness.”

I continued as Kelly sat slumped in her chair, her face wet with tears sliding silently down her face and neck.

“I tried the best I could but money was tight and I drank a lot to keep away the demons – but they came in an other way.  I was an angry man and took it out on my young son.  Your father.  It’s my fault he became the man he did and followed in my footsteps.  Please forgive us both. Please release us ... and you.”

Kelly remained silent, but something seemed to click inside her.  She’d sat up straighter, her eyes looked clearer and her face became less tense and rigid.  Something seemed to have shifted within her.

“Yes ... yes” Kelly began.  “I get it. I get it now. I can forgive you Grandpa.”

With that the energy in the room changed again with the spirits leaving us to sort out what was what for Kelly. I left her to make a cup of Peppermint tea and told her to relax whilst she processed what had just taken place.

Returning with her steaming tea I noted that Kelly looked different somehow, as though a huge weight had lifted from her.  There seemed to be a light or lightness around her now.  She smiled brightly as I handed her the teacup and I just knew she’d be fine.


Six months later I received an email from Kelly telling me that many things had changed since our session and she no longer felt that heaviness in her heart and that fear and fury she once felt.  Many doors had opened for her in quick succession and she now had the courage to walk through them and embrace life.  She’d even found love.

Forgiveness is a most powerful, life-changing energy and emotion that allows us to release and heal ourselves and our lives.



·        Most often spirit will present on the left or behind the left shoulder to indicate ‘maternity’ or someone from the maternal side of the family.  Appearing on the right side of someone, or presenting behind the right shoulder indicates an entity from the ‘paternal’ side of the family tree.  How far behind or back they present can also indicate where they stand within the family tree.  For example, a passed over aunt – your mother’s sister  - may stand behind your left shoulder to indicate the maternal side of the family, but just off to the left again to indicate a generation behind branching off to the side ... a female contemporary or peer of your mother’s. 

(*This is not necessarily so for ALL mediums, but how it works for myself and many others.)


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