A Skype Dream
Skype is new to me and in case you live in a giant bubble hidden from all the cool stuff in cyberspace (as I apparently I do), Skype is a service that allows you to call anywhere in the world for free, if the person you are calling has a Skype account too.
If you both happen to have a web cam you can feel as if you are sitting in the same room. It's great fun to meet my internet friends face to face and to keep up with family and long lost friends, whether they are across the country or across the pond or down under.
An idea crossed my mind after using Skype a few times. It was way too persistent. This thought went through my mind again and again. I want to Skype Heaven.
Yeah. Heaven. The one person I so deeply desired to speak to, the person whose voice I needed to hear just one more time, the smile I needed to see flashing at me, I just couldn't get to. Not even with Skype.
Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak whispers the o'er fraught heart, and bids it break.
William Shakespeare
It may sound childish and silly. I know it does, but isn't there someone you miss like that? It has been a year and six days since the death of my grandmother and this is the first time I am even able to write about her. And that is fairly significant, considering writing is my therapy.
My heart still hurts when I think about it, so I can't even tell you much about her, except that she continues to inspire me daily by the legacy of wisdom and encouragement she left behind. I miss her.
She was a force of love and patience in my life since...forever really. My earliest memories are of being with her, walking with her, listening to her tell stories. She eventually came to live with me and my husband and children a few years back and I am so thankful for that extra time. So much of her is still here, floating around my home in the form of Japanese tea cups , small ceramic vases she made, bird figurines and tiny little scarves on my daughter's baby dolls.
If only I could Skype her. Just once. To hear her call me Jane (the name she alone called me); to see her smile and tell me everything is going to be just fine, I would surely believe her, as I have since I could first comprehend her words.
Who will tell whether one happy moment of love, or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies?
Erich Fromm
Skype to Heaven
So this thought remained constant in the shadows of my thoughts for days. I want to Skype heaven. I want to Skype Heaven, just once. And finally I did. Sure, I was sleeping, but does that really matter? It was one of those vivid dreams, strikingly real with detail.
I was sitting in my favorite comfy kitchen chair, at my laptop when my Skype phone rang and the little box popped up Nan Calling with a small picture of a bluebird. I rushed to answer, knocking my Japanese tea cup filled with coffee to the floor. And there she was. And I was speechless. "Jane, oh how I've missed you! " Tears began to flow and I couldn't speak. "It's ok. How are those girls of yours? " I cried some more. I managed to mumble something which she clearly understood but I can't remember and she replied "You didn't need to say goodbye. We will meet again. Not too soon though!" she said, waving her hand and laughing.
She went on to tell me many things that I cannot recall at the moment, but seemed to sooth my broken heart. Then finally, "Everything is going to be fine, Jane. " I woke up, still crying. This time my tears were different, somehow healing. I Skyped Heaven. Well, I guess Heaven Skyped me. Either way, that one simple conversation was precisely what I so desperately needed.
Maybe we can't use Skype for such communication, but we can use it to stay close to those we care about. I know I am being just plain corny now, but we can use it to bring us together, to build relationships, to heal old wounds, to smile and say I love you to a friend who really needs our encouragement. It can be a bridge, changing strangers into friends.
So you can call me a crazy corny idealistic dreamer.
Or you can call me on Skype.
Just don't call me Jane.
The Benefits of Skype
Comments
Truly skype is a great resource.
also u should use skype assistant . very helpful mates
Skype is an absolutly excellent resource, I have friends across the pond and it's great for allowing me to talk with them for free.
Skype is an incredible business tool! I use it every single day to catch up with the world around me and old friends as well....Hello...London Calling... any of you Skype hounds out there can add me....the name is the same no matter where I go.
- Author
Thanks guys! I am always late for the party, it seems! I do think Skype is awesome. I will check out Skype assistant too...
I'll 'fess up...never heard of SKYPE, sounds wonderful! But how you segued from modern technology to the depths of your heart was moving, and a true revelation re: your writing gifts. I'm sure your Nan embraces you more than you know. I've already lost both parents (both were younger than I am now!) and all my grandparents. There's something quite odd about having no one on the planet that remembers your childhood or earlier years...you begin 'communicating' with your loved ones very frequently ... no technology needed! Best to you!
I was in the dark about skype as well and maybe there will come a day when I will decide it's something I need in my life....oh how technologically advanced we keep becoming and keeping up w/ it makes me weary!
I echo Desert Blondies comments. You shared your heart and expressed yourself beautifully and it touched me . I'm thankful that one of the many ways God does communicate to us (in your case, bringing peace and comfort) is through our dreams! Dreams can be soooo cool and I'm glad you've written it down and shared it with us.
Blessings right back at ya!
- Author
Hi Desert Blondie and Christine, thank you both so much for the sweet words. She was such an incredible influence in my life. It is still so difficult for me to put it into words, which is so strange. :)
I am glad I am not the only one who didn't know about Skype! If you try it, prepare to get hooked!
I can hardly write. I lost my dearest grandfather last November. What I wouldn't give to Skype him. I always enjoy your writing, Amy. I think this Hub is now my official favorite of yours.
Amy--this is so moving--grabbed me right in the heart--not the skype part, the grandmother part. You can see the love between the two of you in that photo from your wedding day and I thank you for sharing your feelings so eloquently. I loved my grandmother too and miss her still and it has been many years. Like Desert Blondie I talk to her sometimes when I'm falling asleep at night without Skype:-) You really did skype heaven, for sure and here on earth this hub gets a big thmbs up from me
Oh yes, and like you I am new to skype and just discovering its wonders:-)
Wow, what a great article. I feel you were sharing my story. Not of a grandmother but of a dear friend in Heaven (a year and 2 months ago) whom I too so desperately wanted to hear from one more time! And I did! I was not sleeping and I do not have skype. I have a talking phone! I was in my parlor with my daughter and the phone began to ring and it said "Barbara Marciante". On impulse, my daughter Tracey and I jumped and raced to the phone both yelling "it's Barbara". We both realized then she wasn't far from home. Thank you truly for a touching story Amy.
Amy,
What a wonderful dream to be able to Skype Heaven! I love this new technology where you can come to talk face to face with anyone in the world and chat. It is an awesome online innovation. What a wonderful tribute to your grandmother as well.
- Author
Steph, thanks so much. My Skype dream was a gift. I kept waiting for the 1 year mark, as if I would feel better, or be "over it" by then, but it didn't happen. I guess we will never stop missing them. And I think that is the way it should be.
- Author
Thank you Robie, I think I will try that little method that you and Desert Blondie use. Nan's picture is by my bed, and I think of her every night when I look at it. I often wonder what she would say to me at the end of a difficult day - she always had a way of making everything better.
- Author
Hi Dottie, thank you for sharing your story! That would have completely floored me! I think I handle things like this better in dreamland. :) I'm glad you enjoyed reading this and could relate.
Hi Doghouse, I wish this could have been more of a tribute to Nan, but I just can't bring myself to do it yet. I have so many photos, love letters written to and from her and my grandfather during WWII, and more than a few downright hilarious stories. I know you would get a kick out of her family tree. :) Thanks for reading.
Yes, Skype is a wonderful tool. I recently had a business conversation with someone in Germany. For free. How cool is that?
Tom
Amy, a real pleasure to read your new hub about Skype and your very fond memories about your grandma. What a wonderful story.
Amy: how could you scooped me! I've been trying to write that same article for a very long time. Oh, well...back to the drawing board. Seriously though, I thoroughly enjoyed your piece. Thoughtful. Sensitive. And a prose that gets inside your cranial walls and lingers there for meditation.
Wonderful hub!
- Author
Hi Tom, it is so cool to talk to someone for free in Europe! I know (as I am sure you do) just how much it would cost ordinarily. It is so nice to not feel rushed because it is not costing you anything with Skype. :)
Thanks so much Ervin, I am glad you enjoyed reading this. :)
- Author
Kristendom, I'm sorry! I hope you will still write yours also. :) Thank you for the compliment, I love to hear that my writing is sticking. :)
Hi Sweetie pie, thanks for reading!
Great hub! Tears were rolling down my cheeks as I read your story about your grandma. We seem to get attached to grandmas in a special way. I lost mine 8 years ago, but it still hurts at times. I miss her sooo much!
What a moving story! Not what I expected when reading the title. Your grandmother must be so proud of you, Amy Jane.
I read this two days ago. I wasn't sure what to say about it so I didn't comment at the time. God knows what it takes to comfort us. He uses those things and/or people who are familiar to us to show us how much we are loved. I am glad that you are comforted, and I love how you wrote this hub.
A big thumbs up from me.
i love skype!
- Author
Alexadry, I'm sorry I made you cry - you can obviously relate to what I am feeling. Grandmother's do hold a special place in many hearts. I can't imagie that we will ever stop missing them.
Thank you New Day, I'm glad you liked it, even if the story was a little unexpected.:)
- Author
Thank you so much, Sir Dent. I enjoyed your insight. I agree, God has such interesting ways of comforting us and showing us that we are loved. My Skype dream was like a little hug from God - okay, more like a big hug. :)
Thanks for reading sadonna. :)
amy jane right now is the best time to give you a skype hug and i hope you accept it. i believe there is much healing going on as you allow yourself to grieve and share your truth with others. it's all part of the journey. take as much time as you need. I believe Nan understands and will keep holding your hand until you're ready to stand. the rhyme came spontaneously here. do take care. off to skype heaven now:)
Now that is a far out way to use technology. It sounds as though you did skype heaven. I too was blessed with a grandma who enriched my life. You are fortunate to have had such a connection and I applaud your sharing yourself with us. Thanks, NEIL
Amy, I just lost my dear grammy last week - I have been unable to put my mind to doing much of anything since then! She was my inspiration and my biggest cheerleader in life - I don't know how life will go on for our family without her. She was our anchor.
She was so sick for four years with chronic lung disease from living in a house that had mold growth in her basement that we didn't know was there. I am so glad that she isn't suffering and struggling to breathe anymore, but I am selfishly so sad for my own personal loss. I've never lost anyone close to me before.
Last weekend was really tough. But this week I have successfully "ignored" my grief by being busy with cub scout camp all week. Your article was God gently nudging me back into reality. It hurts to feel this pain, but so, so necessary.
Thanks for writing this, Amy - I skyping you a hug right now (sorry for getting your shoulder wet with my tears...)
Oh to have been able to start writing about your grandma, you are taking the steps to healing. I give you a warm hug now and pray that you feel Nan's hug and whisper that indeed all is well and feel her hand brush your hair and gently wipe your tears. Everything is going to be fine Amy. It will be...
Like SirDent, I read this beautiful and moving hub two days ago, but I just couldn't comment then, and I'm even finding it hard now.
I believe completely that your Nan Skyped you from heaven, and I also believe she paved the way for doing it by planting that persistent wish about Skyping heaven in your head and heart. Somehow, she knew she'd have to encourage the round-about path of your wishes and arrive at the back door of your dreams.
My grandmother has been gone for many years now, and I'm thinking that your Nan is coaching my Ellie-Ellie on how to make me get Skype, too.
Amy, how heart-warming, how beautiful. Thank you so much for giving your sorrow words and sharing the words with us. Shakespeare had some mighty fine words there himself, didn't he?
- Author
Thank you so much Dayzeebee and Neil, for your kindness and understanding.She was certainly a gift in my life and I treasure her memory and all that she taught me.
Kelley, I am so sorry for your loss. I feel the same way about my grandmother. She was my cheerleader. She was the one person who would agree with what I had to say, or wanted to do, regardless of whether I was right or wrong! I still don't know how I am getting along without that. I guess she is "holding me up" from Heaven. I have thought so much about how we need a person like that in our lives; a person who believes that we are great and talented and just the best thing ever. I am not sure how grandmothers do that. She saw me at my absolute worst, but never judged me. I want to be just like her.
Thank you for sharing your story. I am sending a hug right back to you. :)
- Author
Thank you Michelle, for the hugs and prayers. :)
Sally, I agree about the round-about path! That was always her way of getting through to me. I hope Ellie Ellie calls soon. Shakespeare has words for everything, it seems. Giving your sorrow words does help. Finally, I am able to say that with certainty.
Ok, I confess to being one of the bubble people who never heard of Skype. I may or may not check it out (probably won't lol) but, the part of this story about your dream and speaking to your grandmother was moving and a joy to read.
- Author
Thank you Shadesbreath! Being a bubble person isn't so bad really. :)
I live in Japan and I learnt about Skype many years ago. As it is pretty much free the word got around within the foreign communicty very quickly. In the early days we didn't have the line speeds but now no trouble at all.
I know that many of the ex pats living here depend on Skype to keep them in touch with their families back home free of charge or very cheaply. It is a great service and well worth your professional mention.
Thank you Amy Jane.
Your fan.
Mon.
- Author
Thanks Mon, nice to see you! I had no idea you lived in Japan. :) I guess skype has been around for awhile and is clearly very useful for those living abroad, away from their family and friends. It is so easy now, but I am always late to the party. That's what happens when you don't keep up with the news! :)
Amy Jane,
What a wonderful dream to have! I am so glad your heart feels better. This was a great lens.
Hi Amy Jane another great read hear. I use skype myself to keep my long distent friends closer I tried yahoo messenger but found skype much better and more dependable.
Amy Jane,
I am not sentimental, but your hub gave me pause for thought. I didn't have a relationship with Grandparents and it is something that I regret. In a way, I wish there was a skype for second chances.
Thanks for your hub.
sschilke
- Author
Lilymag, thank you.:)
Aquariancore, I have heard that skype has the most reliable service. I am quite happy with it myself and have not hadany issues (except that I can't skype heaven at will)!
sschilke, thank you for commenting. Skyping for a second chance would be incredible as well. The ties of family, whether they are close to us or not, are still so strong. I only knew my grandparents on my mother's side and I have always regretted not knowing them all. You have given me something new to think about. :)
ya skype is a cool thing.
- Author
Lol, thanks! Pope? :)
Mon is right, Skype is invaluable to expats. I used to live in Japan and now live in Poland and I really couldn't live without it!
Thanks for putting another slant on it. I will think about that as I drift off to sleep tonight.
Tom
- Author
Hi Tom, I have become dependent on skype in a very short time, so I can imagine how helpful it would be to have when traveling or living abroad. It would cost a fortune to keep in touch without it! I am glad you enjoyed this, thanks for commenting.
I installed the original Skype on my computer two years ago. I never used it once.
My interest was reawakened recently when I wound up on a team for the 30 Day Challenge where there were two members in Texas, one in California, one in Switzerland, another in Scotland and me; the team captain, in North Carolina.
We had a five-way conversation where all of us were able to speak with each other and get a lot done, all within about an hour. The best part -- It didn't cost us a nickel.
From the number of comments here, I would say that you hit a responsive chord.
Congratulations.
Bob Diamond R.Ph (former newspaper reporter)
- Author
Hi Bob! Thank so much for the comment. Glad to hear you are using Skype now! It really is fun. I am doing the 30DC too and use it for our group calls - it really is so cool to be on with people on 4 continents at one time! Best of luck in the 30DC. :)
Love Skype, it keeps me connected with friends far and wide for absolutely free. Surely few services can beat that! Yahoo messenger now have a service which allows to call other yahoo users for free. have tried this but the lines were not clear, so have stopped.
- Author
Hi Rarestone, Skype seems to be the best! I have heard that the lines aren't clear on other services, but have not had the need to try them out. Skype always does the job well. Thanks for reading. :)
I don't know why I haven't done it yet. It definitely comes under the category of *shoulds* by all accounts here - thanks for the reminder amy jane!
I'm constantly being nagged by relatives in Ireland and NZ to Skype, but still haven't done it. I don't know what it is I'm resisting really. I found your story about your Grandma very touching. I didn't see my grandparents often, because they lived a distance away, but wish I'd had more of a connection with them. Dreams are wonderful things, aren't they. I dreamed recently of an old friend that I have lost touch with, and it was as though he were in the room with me. I woke up feeling so happy.
I opened this because I could relate to Skyping- my daughter was in Aix en Provence all last year. Some days we'd begin a Skype and go back to it all day long. It was like having her in the room: a continuous conversation.
Added plus was your dream. My dad has been gone so long I should get over it, but if I could Skype heaven, his is the voice I'd long to hear.
Thanks for a lovely Hub.
I'd like that too, hon. I'd be on the phone all night, though, catching all my loved ones up on the news. My dad, uncles, aunts, grandparents, and most importantly, my husband.
I know they can hear us, and if we are very, very quiet, we can hear them as well.
I have not used this service and don't know if i should. It is depressing for me now to stare at the phone hoping a woman will call, then after all hope is lost I check my email...nothing...and then stare at my yahoo messenger...still silent. I can't expose myself to any more pain...nice hub though!
- Author
Thank you Storyteller and Dafla for you beautiful comments. Yes, if we are very quiet we can hear them softly...
Funnebone, you are too funny.:) I know you are making that up, of course. With your sense of humor women must be busting down your door to get at you! Thanks for making me laugh!
Wow! This has been one whirlwind ride tonight getting here. It started in my Gmail, I see "amy jane is following you on Twitter", I click that link and go to your profile on Twitter, read several of your articles and links, (you know how that is), I become even more intrigued that you are a writer (I love to read and am a closet storyteller!) and then I see you have your Hubpages link, I came over here, read your bio page, I see "software" in there (I am a software developer) so I perk up, I see Skype in the title of one of your Hubs, I communicate daily with many people from all over the world for FREE, it is a fabulous communication tool. But, that is where things turned, well, away from technology and back to Reality. I really enjoy your writing and want to thank you for sharing part of your heart with us. Losing a loved one is difficult, but, hearing that we are not alone in this pain makes all the difference!
- Author
Hi Craig,
I'm so glad you left this comment and that you have enjoyed reading my articles. Skype really is a wonderful way to communicate! Losing someone so close to me has really changed how I look at everything - and it seems that I am not alone in that. Sharing my story, in this case, was therapeutic for me. Thanks again and I will be following along on Twitter! :)
I really enjoyed your article, thanks for sharing a piece of your heart.
- Author
Thanks goodfriendiam. This hub is kind of special to me. Even though I wrote it over a year ago, it still brings up a lot of emotion! I still miss my Nan. :) Thank you for reading.
Yes isn't that cool!!
Sharon Smith
- Author
Thanks Sharon.:)
Very sweet - I miss my grandmother as well! Best to you.
Skype to heaven would be wonderful. May dad would be able to meet my sons and beautiful daughter-in-law. I know the yearning for someone dear.
Dear Amy Jane-This tribute to your grandmother is very moving and powerful and I have the goosebumps to prove it. It sounds like your grandmother was a great source of inspiration and wisdom for you. You dreamed of her because she knew it was the right time to connect with you. Sometime when our grief is too much, we can't be open to this communication. You must have been ready for a visit from your grandmother after starting your healing process. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful story of your grandmother skyping you. I hope my dad skypes me!
65