Interview: Nellieanna Hay

Nellieanna Hay is, without a doubt, the most self - actualized person I have met on HubPages.

To me, Nellieanna is ageless. She is filled with the wisdom of a grand elder with the charming curiosity of a child. She is both comfortingly old-fashioned and thoroughly modern in her manner of thinking.

Nellieanna's poetry is reflective of a life well lived. Her style is filled with love, hope and beauty, written in a graceful and flowing manner. Like the author, her work is timeless, thought - provoking and reaches the heart of the matter.

You will have the opportunity to meet Nellieanna and hear her beautiful voice in this amazing interview. Enjoy and take a moment to read her poetry for yourself...!

Ah, but I'm seldom uptight. Physically my most relaxed position is stretched out full length, sans pillow. Emotionally, it's probably right after completion of a project: a painting, a poem, a hub, taxes, paying bills, a challenging email; that feeling of relief and accomplishment is both exhilarating & relaxing.

The times I feel saddest are…

I'm seldom sad, either, so measuring degrees of it is not so easy. When I'm sad, I'm thoroughly sad. I can be touched by many things to feel pity or empathy, a sense of revulsion at man's inhumanity to man, sympathy when people are helpless victims of meanness, crime or natural disasters, and especially when people are victims of horrendous cruelties. I wish it were otherwise and it makes me sad.

Something I'd like to teach others...
to have abiding hope, to see setbacks as challenges for improvement and to give themselves & each other benefit of the doubt.

My secret passion ... my dream job....

Oh dear. Now, at 80, it's living to an active, vibrant 100 and beyond, still writing and sharing what I've learned in my own special way, still independent and self-reliant and going for more.
Secret passions have developed over the years.

At 12, it was either to be an astronomer, philosopher, ballerina or femme fatale.

At 20 it was to become a successful fashion designer.

At 22 it was to be the best wife and mother I could possibly be.

At 40 it was to BE - me!

At 50 it was to become a National Sales Director in Mary Kay.

At 60 it was to run my ranch well and fulfill my heritage

At 70 it was to help my beloved George live out his life as joyously as possible and to join him in it.

The bottom line has always been, - to be myself and all I could be with the greatest good and least damage to those around me.

Most hated gift I ever gave someone ...

Come'on. I don't give hateful gifts. If I slipped up & inadvertently gave a horrid gift, then, because I don't give gifts to hateful people who would say so, I'd never even know!

The gift I could have done without ...

In a way, almost all gifts are "extras", barring baby shower gifts: -most are not actual necessities. So, technically, one could 'do without' them all! Anyway, I don't think I ever got a gift I'd have preferred not receiving, though of course, some fit my tastes and uses better than others. I don't use some personal products I'm given, but still, the gifts I most treasure are those given with love, whatever they are. I just display them if I can't use them and remember the kindness involved.

If you peeked in my junk drawer, you'd be surprised to find ...

Tools! I adore wrenches, screwdrivers, hammers, pliers, heavy-duty staple guns, grommet appliers, levelers. . . . The tool love crosses over into sewing and cooking tools, all kinds of electronic parts and tools, of course, but the surprise element is more probably the building tools I love and keep in my own supply. I lend them out only conditionally and follow up on retrieving them to my domain. :-)

My date from Hades ....

Dating? Are you kidding? Wow - do I remember that far back? OK; - once I was so timid I could think of nothing to say so I started singing a grade-school song, "A little Dutch boy and a little Dutch girl. . .sat dreaming on a hill. . .Said the little Dutch girl to the little Dutch boy, 'when will you say, I do? and the little dutch mill went 'round and 'round and 'round went the little Dutch mill". No telling what my date thought I was implying! All I clearly remember is that there was no follow-up call or date.

Another time on a date to a movie, I wore a hoop skirt I'd designed (way before they were in fashion). We sat in the balcony where the rows are steep and close together. My hoop nearly strangled the person in the row below. The embarrassment was visceral.

On the other side of the equation is one guy who might fit the description but I'm too charitable to mention him, am I not? I will say that he had two left feet and needed coaching on any & every level.

My worst/ or funniest vacation story ....

I've never been on a bad vacation. But let's see; - a funny story on a (tenting) camping trip was when we took our two cats. They did OK till there was a thunderstorm. Panic in the tent! Camille crawled into my sleeping bag and buried herself at the bottom. Toulouse unzipped the tent and got out into the dark and the rain and we barely found him, drenching and unforgiving. After that, we went shopping for an RV! No more tenting for the Hay family!

An ocean liner cruise to the Mediterranean and all the ports of call, with stopovers in the Greek Isles, Switzerland, N. Africa (if it's peaceful), Spain and Portugal -- and wherever else we drop anchor.

What I most look for in a friend…

Mutual sharing, honest listening, honesty, self-reliance, humor, sensitivity, good disposition, ability to work out differences with civility and mutual respect - and delight in the friendship.

This expression of friendship was given to me by one of my dearest life-long friends, calligraphed on a decoupage plaque she made and gave me many years ago, and which still hangs in my kitchen. The quotation expresses what is, to me, surely one of the most endearing traits of true friendship:

“Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away.” ~ George Eliot

Something I will never part with…

Ahem - at 80 I'm very aware that I'll part with everything when I go no matter how much I may value it, except my spirit. I'd like to leave a legacy of love and honor, and possibly my poetry. Main thing is to 'have' what matters, not to cling to "somethings" which are destined to be parted with.

Listen to and trust my guts.

The worst part of getting older...

Running short of time to do everything I'd love to do. But it reminds me to make what I do, count, and that time is only NOW anyway, at every age. Diminishing ranks in the members of my peer group.

A writing lesson I learned the hard way...

I'll never forget that big red message written by Miss Williams in a margin of one of my essays in junior high English: SWEEPING ASSERTION!! I won't claim to have always heeded that lesson, but I've never forgotten it! It does make me stop to think whether or not my serious assertions are defensible before asserting them so firmly! But if it's an imaginative assertion . . what's better than a sweeping one?

My favorite movie and why...

For a movie buff of so many years as I, this is next to impossible to answer in the singular. But since I can't attempt to mention all of them, I'll simply offer: "A Room With A View", because it's a delightful period romp with fantastic actors and characters, a wonderful sparkly romance, a subtle study of the times and people against a gorgeous background of England and Florence, based on a book by an esteemed British author, E. M. Forster. But my tastes in movies are eclectic. I could mention so many more and some would surprise you. Like in poetry, I look for quality. In movies, add good story, great acting, outstanding filmography -and effect - in a variety of genres. It started very young with me and keeps expanding. I've an enormous collection of DVDs and I only acquire the ones I'll want to watch again and again. I could list almost any of them.

What subjects / genres do you enjoy reading/ about ?

Ah - again my tastes are varied. I've gone through it being all non-fiction, all historic novels, all classics, all cheap romances. What I really enjoy most is good writing. I love Jane Austen, Mark Twain, and a new (to me) writer recommended by my friend, De Greek: Sebastian Barry. I also can't resist a book about the study of the mind or customs of peoples of another time and age. My eyesight keeps my perusal slow, though, plus I prefer to linger and chew on what I read, so I'm not a fast reader, usually not nearly as fast as I am a book collector! If I live to be 200 I'll never read all the wonderful books I've acquired! My love affair with books goes back almost to infancy. Mother wrote my first words in my "Baby Book". First: 'pretty'. Then: 'book'. The rest is history.

What would be a subject/genre that you would like to read more/ about...

hmmm. This is dangerous to answer, since I'm constantly presented with a revue of fascinating subjects written by fantastic writers among my HP colleagues, which trigger my interest and challenge my mind to read and grasp them! But danger is OK. But, then, I've difficulty reading anything cursorily, so for me, it's an investment of time to give full and deserved attention to the array of good writing here. In general, things I'd be stirred to pursue would be more about India and its amazing culture, more probes into generic abuse and scientific forefronts. But - heck. What I know is that I can pursue them if I'll just do it, what with abundant resources on every side. At times the challenge is to sort down on what really MATTERS and go for it. It seems, though, to me, - my first choice is always real people, who sometimes obscure subjects. In a showdown, I choose investing my eyes and time in people.

Can you take us to a favorite piece of writing on HubPages by you that does not get much traffic...

OK. I've written a lot for a long while here, so arbitrarily:

Magnolia - opus 1

I greatly value this piece by my friend Alan R. Berry, also known as arb on HubPages:

Musings on Poetry

Speaking of greatly valuing, I felt blessed when Nellieanna shared this special reading with me for the interview, which she filmed on September 6th, 2012:

I suppose that 'packing up and leaving the party' means it's because it stirs me so much that I just have to 'get out of here' WITH someone special? wow. um. This takes a little thought. A song alone wouldn't bring on that response for me, unless alone with the right "someone special" who feels it, too, a song like "Seduces Me" by Celine Dion. wow!

I have told you that, in so many ways, you remind me of my dear Mother, Nellieanna.

As such, I wish to dedicate The Supremes song: "Mother Dear" to you.

Thank you for taking the time to share yourself with us, sweet woman. ♥ Maria

© Maria Jordan (revised October, 2014)