Childhood Dreams: Do You Remember?
Do you remember? Resting on the lush, green grass as a child, looking up at the clouds, dreaming of having wings or fantasizing about exotic places far away? Do you remember? Playing with friends and talking about all of the things you would do when you became an adult? Do you remember? Dreaming dreams, making plans, no power on earth could stop you as you prepared to treat life like it was your own personal candy store.
Do you remember?
And as the years slowly trickled by and reality and responsibilities and life happened those dreams became harder to visualize where once there was such clarity. Finally you look back over the landscape of your life and realize that most of those long-ago dreams have disappeared to be replaced by the mortgage and parenthood and credit cards and all the other trappings of life.
Do you remember?
QUIET DESPERATION
Henry David Thoreau, American poet, essayist and philosopher (1817-1862) wrote in his famous work Walden: “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” I was thinking of that quote the other day and marveled at how timely that quote was, and is, considering it was written over one-hundred and seventy years ago. Has much changed since the time of Thoreau? Is it as true today as Thoreau believed it to be in 1840?
WHAT WERE YOUR CHILDHOOD DREAMS?
Do you remember? There is only one of mine I remember clearly and that was to become a professional baseball player. How typical is that for a young boy? I held onto that dream through high school and two years of college before the physics of the human body ruled my dream null and void.
http://billybuc.hubpages.com/hub/My-Love-Affair-With-Baseball
As for other childhood dreams I simply do not remember them. I have vague recollections of dreams of making a ton of money and traveling around the world and experiencing adventure at every turn, but specifics escape me now that I am in my sixty-third year. Seriously, though, is that not the way of most people? I am more than willing to bet that most people discard childhood dreams as they mature and feel no remorse over their loss. Far more damaging, however, in my humble opinion, are the dreams we dare to dream when we leave childhood in our wake and approach adulthood.
Do you remember?
WHAT WERE YOUR DREAMS IN YOUNG ADULTHOOD?
Now I think we get to the crux of Thoreau’s statement. Once we reach a certain age our dreams become that which we seek for years to come. A happy marriage, healthy children, great job that we love, a little extra money left over with which to enjoy life, all are the dreams and aspirations of most young adults. Are they not? So we begin our adult journey and start taking baby steps to make our dreams a reality.
We find a job that will service us well until we manage to grab hold of the dream job. We start the dating process in hopes of finding the perfect mate with whom we will spend the rest of our lives. We try to tuck a little money away for future investments or to pay for the dream house, and we try to find the time to satisfy our own needs for relaxation and entertainment.
Somewhere along the line, however, progress starts to stall and the occasional hiccup in our plans show up on a more regular basis. It becomes harder to save for that house; the job that you thought was a stepping-stone to greater things becomes a job you can’t do without if you are to pay your bills. The perfect mate appears to be late in arriving and you wonder if maybe you set your sights a bit too high. Bills pile up and responsibilities pile up and now you are working harder for less and any chance of finding time for relaxation and entertainment is slim at best.
What were those dreams again?
Do you remember?
AN EXAMPLE
My father was an athletic, energetic, seemingly happy high school student when The Great Depression sucked the life out of the United States in the mid-1930’s. He dropped out of high school after his sophomore year and “rode the rails” looking for odd jobs around the Midwest so he could earn some money for his parents. When World War 2 began he enlisted in the army and served four years and upon leaving the service in 1945 married my mother. They moved to the West Coast in search of work and settled in Tacoma, Washington where they rented a home and began to chase their own dreams.
The only job my dad could find in 1948 was as a laborer at a sand and gravel pit, certainly not a job he dreamed of but one that paid the bills and allowed my parents to raise enough money to buy a home and adopt yours truly. They were well on their way to achieving some of the things they had talked about when they first married and the future looked bright.
My dad remained as a laborer at that sand and gravel pit for twenty-one years until his death in 1969. As a family we always had enough to meet basic needs but rarely did we have extra. Dad would pick up added shifts whenever they were available; mom, who started out as a stay-at-home mother, took to working full-time to help pay the bills.
I grew up watching the dreams slowly disappear from these good, honest people. Towards the end of my dad’s life he smiled less, moved slower and somewhere along the way the spark in his eyes disappeared. In other words, he had led a life of quiet desperation until that life finally ended.
DOES THAT HAPPEN TODAY?
We are now in year four of the current economic recession, or is it five or six? The gap between the Have’s and the Have Not’s is widening with each passing year. Real estate took a nose dive from which it will be very slow to recover and former executives vie for menial jobs with high school dropouts.
Do you remember?
I don’t believe it is my imagination when I say that there appears to be more unhappiness in the world than any time in my lifetime. I base that statement solely on casual observation. People seem to be ruder than they once were; violence seems to dominate the nightly news and alcohol and drug abuse seem to be the norm rather than the exception.
http://billybuc.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Become-An-Alcoholic
Do you remember?
So many kids that I taught, kids who once had dreams of unlimited possibilities, seem today to be resigned to a lifetime of sand and gravel jobs. So many friends of mine can barely pay their bills and are trying to keep afloat in a sea of rising debt. So many couples who once laughed and played and loved fiercely now seem to go through the motions of marriage, their main focus just getting through another day.
Do you remember?
AND NOW FOR THE REST OF THE STORY
Well, I hate to drop this bomb on you but there is no rest of the story. Does any of this sound familiar? Do you find yourself in a similar situation? Are you living a life of quiet desperation? If you are, do you have an escape plan?
http://billybuc.hubpages.com/hub/Saying-Goodbye-To-A-Life-That-Wasnt-Working
I have no solution for you if you are living this type of existence. I had a solution for myself and I am now living free of the self-imposed restrictions. I make no claims that it was easy nor do I claim that my plan would work for anyone else. What I do claim, however, is that life is too short to be miserable and to just resign ourselves to misery is a disservice to ourselves and our loved ones.
Look back over the landscape of your life. Go back to the early days.
Do you remember?
