Obsessed with Obesity

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Today so many of us are obsessed with obesity and that obsession prevents us from living.

Obsession according to the Riverside II Dictionary means: a persistent preoccupation with an idea or motion.

When we obsess about getting “fat” we lose our freedom to be happy. We lose our ability to make rational decisions. We forget that food is simply a tool and not an enemy. We judge others by their size and most harming is we judge ourselves unfairly. We forget to be kind to ourselves.

I don’t imagine that I am overweight. I know it for a fact. However, I have learned over the years that my weight is not who I am. It simply is a part of what constitutes the real me. Note: I said a part of me. There are many parts, all needing attention.

Do I have goals to lose some of that excess poundage? Of course I do. Not, however, so I will look svelte and knock someone over with my beauty, but so I can be the healthiest I can be.

I used to ride the diet roller coaster. Because of that my daughters were obsessed with their weight. They were small, but did not see themselves as such. My example clouded their reality. I did not see it in time to prevent them from some very uncomfortable times in their lives. I was a bad example to them and to others watching me.

Make no mistake - others are watching you as they watch me. They may not even know they are watching. Those who admire us and think we are so smart and wise and fun and like being around us, watch our actions more than we ever realize. Often they emulate us without realizing.

My mother was so weight conscious that I worried about myself from an early age.(I was never overweight until I started having children.) She learned through me not to be so verbally concerned. Hence, when my sister came along, nine years after me, she was a chubby little girl and grew up to be an obese woman; one that finds the battle to lose (even for her health) too much for her.

I do not condone becoming fat or staying that way. However, there are many folks out here that absolutely cannot lose weight for what ever reason.

What I am proposing is that you take a good long look at yourself and decide, if you are overweight, what you want of yourself in life. Are you healthy? Are you happy? Do you enjoy life, or shy away from it?

When you have been able to honestly answer these questions for yourself you will be on the road to good health.

Notice that I have not once recommended any one lose weight. That is because I am not qualified to do so.

Some people can have a tremendous amount of weight, be perfectly healthy and happy with themselves, and never consider a diet. I applaud those folks.

Obesity” means: extremely fat or grossly overweight.

For myself I am most generous. For my height, my ideal weight is between 125 and 167 pounds. I know from being a true yo-yo dieter over the years that I feel my best at 145 pounds. I have energy. I am able to perform my household chores with out getting out of breath and taking walks is not drudgery, but a welcome activity.

I like the way I look in my clothes and keep my mind busy on other more profitable things, like my family and my writing.

This attitude did not just come to me, nor was I born with it. I have had much trial and error to come to this point in my life.

Once, when I had four children (before number five came along) I attended a dinner with some friends. I was feeling kind of nice - looking good, I thought.

As I met one of my table mates (a lady of importance in this group) she said to me in a hushed tone, “Dear I would not wear red if I were you. It makes you look fat.” I was crushed. I had saved for that very particular red dress and until that moment was feeling pretty good about how I looked in it. I had just lost my baby weight from number four.

I was so embarrassed that I did not eat the chocolate moose that was served. I really wanted to, but I could not.

From that point on until just a few years ago, my entire wardrobe consisted of black and white. I did not have the best of self-esteem. After all, this “lady” told me I looked fat!

Some will say, “Oh I’m not vain. I don’t care what I weigh!” I say, it does not matter what I weigh to anyone but myself. If someone is out to judge me then let the consequences be on their heads.

I am more concerned with my health and my activities. I do not look at someone and say, boy she is fat! If a person is what I consider to be obese, I pray for them, quietly. I do not dwell on their size, nor do I ever give them advice to change themselves.

The truth is, when I meet someone I am looking in their eyes, not at their size. I had a friend who must have weighed over 300 pounds. I had known her for years and just thought of her as my friend, when one day she mentioned she wanted to lose weight. THAT is the first time I even saw her weight. I knew and saw and dealt with her heart and her personality, but never noticed she was over weight.

So that’s what I am saying… look in the eyes and in the heart of your fellow human beings. They will deal with their weight however they are so inspired. Make sure you never inspire them in this area, unless they ask you to.

Obsession in any area is a dangerous thing. Balance is the polar opposite of obsession. Balance is healthy. However, it requires that you look inside yourself for the answers of life, not outside at others. Remember, you have control over you and only you.

After all, you would not want to be responsible for all those folks you judge, or might judge to be grossly fat, now would you? Not me either.

Shucks, being responsible for myself sometimes seems like a huge task for which I under qualified. Deep down I Know I am, (responsible for myself, that is); even though the task remains a challenge.

As I’ve been hub hopping I’ve noticed that there are more articles on dieting and losing weight and toning up than all other topics combined. It has become an epidemic. We must work hard to stomp it out!

First, pledge to yourself that you will not even notice other’s weight, but will concentrate on the people they are.

Second promise yourself that you will look more closely at you to discover exactly what makes you tick. Bet it’s not your weight. If it is, it is time to take action and change that.

Dwell on your strengths and your abilities (NOT on your weaknesses or disabilities). Trust me, if you look, truly look, you will see so much good that you never even noticed about yourself.


I looked and saw what I thought others saw; and I was ever so sad.

I felt I knew what they saw and cried, would I always be so bad?


Then along came one who looked only in my heart,

Encouraging me and soon I wanted to be a part

Of the human race and I wanted to run

Where no one ever before had come undone.


I looked and saw what I thought others saw, only to notice the gray cloud growing.

I looked harder and much to my awe was amazed to find myself overflowing

My home with love and laughter and light. I set about to make things right.


Now I look in the mirror for myself leaving insecurities on the shelf

Smiling at the image that I see and I know I like the me I see.

I will hold my head high and I will go with faith to live each day in a healthy way

As well to spread all around love, laughter and happy sound.

More by this Author


6 comments

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 5 years ago

As long as your body weight is good and allows you to do all that you want to, whether it be taking long walks, running, or enjoying life, and not feeling out of breath...Then you are ok from a health point of view...Well written Hub on this subject...Liked your views.

Pixienot, I love your beautiful poem as well, really says it...thank you.


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Thank you Ms. Malin. :)

Your comments mean the world to me!

I appreciate so much that you took the time to read my work. Have a wonderful weekend (starting right now!)

I'm loving the Spring-type weather!

Miles of smiles sent your way!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana

I agree with b.Malin, as long as you feel good, and you aren't out of breath, or having health problems from your weight, it should be no worry.

It has been important for me to remember "balance" in my weight loss. Exercise along with a reasonable diet, and not expecting too much too soon.. oh and lots of water!

I, too, loved your poem, mom. It was very beautiful. :)


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Thank you, Susan. I know you really believe this and that makes your words even more special to me. Thank you again!


almasi profile image

almasi 5 years ago

"Now I look in the mirror for myself leaving insecurities on the shelf"

I love that line.

I once read that the best way to love yourself in the here and now instead of obsessing over your imperfections whether weight, height, curves or the lack of them is to imagine yourself at 90 with your supposed current imperfections now covered with wrinkles and you will find that they are not so bad right now.


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Oh almasi, I love it! Thank you so much for sharing.

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