Famous New Year's Resolution Lists
77Resolutions Through History
Having sat myself down recently to consider my own New Year's Resolutions,my mind began to wander and I wondered what might be the resolutions of some of the great figures in history.
Having access to the internet I discovered a number of interesting examples of such which I share with you here.
Read with tongue in cheek.
Eve's List
- cut Adam's hair and trim his beard.
- sew some curtains for the hut and maybe make some throw-pillows
- ask God to make the sky a little bluer and the stars brighter
- check out that tree--the one with the talking snake at the bottom. The apples look tasty and we need more fruit in our diet.
Shalmaneser III
Shalmaneser III's List
- trade wife #3 in harem to King Sneferu of Egypt for a weed-wacker. Will come in handy on the 'hanging gardens of Babylon'.
- send spies to see what wife #17 is up to. I think she is giving the other girls ideas about forming a union. Fewer work hours, better perks and overtime for being lent-out to foreign dignitaries. Nip that in the bud !
- write an epic. Call it 'Gilgamesh'. Or maybe something catchier like 'Midnight Cowboy'.
- invade and conquer some neighboring regions before going on summer vacation.
Shakespeare's List
- ask Christopher Marlowe for more ideas like that one he gave me for 'Hamlet'. Bribe him with ale if necessary.
- write more serious copy--maybe get into the existential themes and all that.
- get new hosiery--all of mine have gapping holes in them and when I bend over in Richard III I get whistles from the gallery.
-
ask the Queen to lower the taxes on The Globe if I write her some sonnets. If the taxes get any higher we will have to consider having a concession stand and selling popcorn and soft drinks to make up the difference.
Thomas Edison's List
- invent the light-bulb
- invent the movie camera
- invent the gramophone
- invent the car
- invent the computer
- invent web 2.0
[NB: may not get to everything this year]
Sarah Palin's List
- buy a new rifle with telescopic sight.
- practise saying 'you betcha' when I have no new ideas
- ask Bristol if she wants to try my blush-brush.
- tell Tina Fey that I want some royalties for giving her that "I can see Russia from my house" line.
On To My List...
Well enough wood-gathering. On to write my own New Year's Resolutions.
Starting with...
- write more Hubs?
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New Year's Resolution Lists in the News
- Bring your family to a holiday breakfast with SantaBurtonsville Gazette22 hours ago
Bring the kids out to meet Old Saint Nick himself at a breakfast with Mr. Claus from 9 to 11 a.m. Saturday at the East County Community Center, 3310 Gateshead Manor Way in Silver Spring. Santa will be on hand starting at 10 a.m. to hear children's Christmas lists and take photos.
- You say you want a resolution . . . here's one for healthier food habitsToday's News-Herald3 days ago
(ARA) - All the gravy has been ladled. The cookies have crumbled. The red and green candies are on the clearance rack. That can only mean one thing: people all over the country are resolving to eat better, if not less often.
- Local hero: Norristown's zep sandwichThe Philadelphia Inquirer32 hours ago
In a crowded sandwich-eating world of hoagies, grinders, subs, and po'boys, Norristown's own zep flies somewhat beneath the radar. But in certain quarters, the tradition is an intensely local hero.
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Comments
robie2: Thanks! I had a real hard time sneaking into Palin's Govenor's mansion and reading her list...got out just before she found her gun! ;)
robie2 says:
11 months ago
LOL at Sarah Palin's list--ditto William Shakespeare's. Delightful New Years Hub, Woody and a great way to start 2009.