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Make Money NOW at Excrement, Inc.

Updated on March 20, 2012

Your Work Hates You

Are you tired of going to work for an unappreciative boss? Do you spend half your life and most of your energy working for some company that won't remember your name next week if you were to drop dead right now? Would you like to pay off your mortgage in full? Hell, would you just like to just have a mortgage instead of paying rent? Do you care about kittens?

Well, if you answered yes to any of these questions, you might want to look at Excrement, Inc. and the exciting opportunities we have to offer you.

Excrement, Inc. specializes in total crap. We manufacture, package and distribute nothing but crap. Crap is our motto, method and means. We are crap specialists and we have a load of crap for you!

If you act now, you can become an affiliate of Excrement, Inc. and learn how to sell our crap over the Internet in a variety of ways. We will train you at no cost to become a master crap merchant with an income that is only limited by how much crap you can push out. All you have to do is click HERE and your life as a crap merchant can begin.

Need More Info???

Well, if that's not enough to get you to check it out, look at all the things you can do for yourself and the world around you through marketing all this crap. You can:

  • Save babies
  • Save puppies
  • Save kittens
  • Save the world
  • Become rich
  • Increase sexual desirability
  • Gain the respect of world leaders
  • And even receive personal emails from God.

Who wouldn't want to do and have all this? I'm fairly sure you would!!! So act now before it's too late. The Internet will only support so much crap. Don't let your chance slip away. CLICK HERE NOW.

Puppy milkshakes are an outrage!
Puppy milkshakes are an outrage!

The Skeptical Type, Eh?

Fine, if you still need more proof, here's a few more details on how it works. Check this out:

Save Babies

As a crap master, you will save small babies from horrible lives. Right now, over five thousand babies meet horrible fates at the hands of evil, horribleness every day. As a member of Excrement, Inc. your crap enterprise will save all babies from suffering horribly forever.

Save Puppies

Something is going on in third-world animal shelters right now that just makes us at Excrement, Inc. sick. Puppy malts. That's right, you read it right: Puppy malts. Currently there are sixty-four restaurant chains specializing in puppy shakes, malts and daiquiris around the world and we at Excrement, Inc. feel that this is an abomination and promise that if you purchase the start up package as a tier 1 crap merchant, we will look into this puppy problem eventually.

Save Kittens

By becoming a level two affiliate at Excrement, Inc. we will work together with Paws Across the World to save kittens in every way possible. All kittens will become cuter and their sweet little mews will squeak happily with your name if you buy into our crap.

Save the World

As most of you know, cows produce methane gas. This is often associated with crap. Now while we at Excrement, Inc. have nothing to do with cows in any way at all, we recognize that you should recognize the obvious connection to cows provided by your participation in Excrement, Inc. Given the dangers of global warming, it is clear how your investment into your future at Excrement, Inc. is obvious.

Increased sexual desirability

It is a proven fact that our affiliates are so successful that their self esteem begins to swell inside them like a germinating seed of glory. The joy of being part of Excrement, Inc. is such that as your life becomes increasingly full of crap, your inner beauty cannot help but burgeon, manifesting itself from within by swelling your anatomy in perfect sexual ways. Women see bust size increases of up to eight cup sizes and men frequently complain about giant pecks, rippling abs and having to lower their toilets by as much as eleven feet. Such is the power of crap!

Gain the respect of world leaders

Everyone knows that politicians love crap more than anyone else. Crap is their livelihood. As a crap master yourself, you will plop down amongst the privileged of the world, veritable crap ninjas with powers you can't even imagine until you have bought your level four crap kit from Excrement, Inc.

Emails from God

What else do we need to say? If this is even possible, it's worth a click HERE.

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