Can You Hear Me Daddy

I Love You Dad
I Love You Dad

Easter Sunday 2011 My Father Suddenly Passed Away

'I Never Got To Say Goodbye'

It was Easter Sunday I received the call. My father had died. My sister found him cold on the kitchen floor still holding his chocolate milk in one hand. I cried hysterically for hours, my heart ripped in two. My Father was my best friend. I loved him more than anything possible in this world. I still am working through my grief, and am missing him terribly. I sometimes feel that only part of me remains, I cry for him at night-time, my desperate voice travels through the solitary breeze. This poem is dedicated to his memory. My Father was my soul, the most beautiful father one could ever hope for.

I love you Daddy....I am struggling to get back onto my two feet. I am totally lost without you.

My Father was my hero
My Father was my hero
I see your beautiful face Father everywhere I go.
I see your beautiful face Father everywhere I go.
Memories are all I have left. I am lost without him.
Memories are all I have left. I am lost without him.
My Dad was the most kindest person I shall ever know.
My Dad was the most kindest person I shall ever know.

Dedicated To My Beautiful, Kind, Caring Father ........


"I am missing you terribly, how do I live without you?"

God why did you take my Father home?,

Why didn't you take me there instead?,

I never got to say goodbye,

I can't believe he's dead.


He was my friend, my love, my hero,

A perfect, gracious man,

Why he had to die this way,

I just don't understand.


If only angels had prepared me,

I could have been there by his side,

Telling him so many things,

I kept hidden deep inside.


I cry myself to sleep at night,

My world a shade of grey,

Life has been so empty,

Since the day you went away.


Your spirit is bound to mine inside.

Your face paints the vast blue skies,

"Oh God", "Why did you have to take him?,

Why do Fathers have to die?.


I kiss your face upon the wall,

While tears sting my eyes,

My pain is there for all to see,

A grief I cannot hide.


I talk to you at nightime,

I ask you for a sign,

So I can know you're really there,

To heal this heart of mine.


Last week I held you in my arms,

In a golden box so small,

Just me and my Father's ashes,

Within those empty walls.


If God could grant me just one small wish,

It would be to run into your arms,

I'm so very sorry Father,

That I couldn't keep you from all harm.


I kiss your face upon the wall,

My heart so full of pain,

It feels this world I live in,

Will never be the same.


At first I wanted nothing more,

Than to join you where you are,

But I knew that's not what you would want,

I felt your wishes from afar.


Daddy I'm lost, I'm hurting deeply,

My need for you abounds,

Yesterday you were here,

Today, you're buried in the ground.


Can you see me from up in heaven,

Can you hear the words I cry,

I beg for you to give me a sign,

That you're up there in the sky.


I wish I could have said "goodbye",

And all I wished to say,

To thank you for the things Dad's do,

In my own very special way.


If I had the choice of wealth and fame,

Or to see you once again,

I'd choose you in an instant,

Through hell, and earth and rain.


My tears spill as I write these words,

My fingers grip me heart

I love you darling Daddy,

I'm so sorry we're apart.


Losing you is the most trying time,

That in my life I've known,

If only I could run to you,

I feel so terribly alone.


Debbie Murray ⓒ 2011



My Dedication Movie I Made For My Father

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Please Feel Free To Leave Your Thoughts 41 comments

Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

God Bless you


SirDent 4 years ago

HUGS to you. I feel your pain. I ,lost my mother a few years ago and it still hurts even today at times. I don't know what to say that can comfort you.

Your poem is well written. You have shown your emotions and vulnerability. I felt the words as I read them. This is what poetry is supposed to be.

Voted up and beautiful.


TheManWithNoPants profile image

TheManWithNoPants 4 years ago from Tucson, Az.

Deb,

Beautiful. Your father is smiling down upon you, and his tears of love join your tears of loss.

I didn't know my father very well, so his loss wasn't much of a loss, but mom died a couple of years ago. I'm an only child, she was an only mom, and a hell of great woman she was at that. Amazing actually. My hero. I had a heads up, and was able to be there holding her hand as she passed. A strange mixture of beauty and sadness. I'm okay, but I still find myself reaching for the phone to call her when something good or bad or funny happens.

Thanks for poem my friend!

jim


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Same to you Frank x

Thanks heaps Sir Dent that means a lot

I appreciate your kind comments you are true blue Jim x


justateacher profile image

justateacher 4 years ago from Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Near Oz...

That made be cry like a little baby...I lost my father when I was eleven and my mother this past year. Although the pain gets a little easier as time goes by, it is still there. My dad never saw me grow up, get married and have children and grandchildren. My mom is missing out on knowing her great grandchildren and they are missing out on two of the best people that ever lived...

Voted up and awesome...


Moms-Secret profile image

Moms-Secret 4 years ago from Central Florida

Grief is so much the same and so different for us all. It is natural to want to take the place of someone that went before us but a father that wonderful would not have wanted that for you. As parents, we pray to be here long enough to take good care of you and that we are not taken until you are old enough to understand it, but our greatest fears are that you go before us or that we are taken while you are still a child. It is not supposed to be the parents job to deal with the loss of their children. Most of us were not designed to survive the grief of a lost child.


KeithTax profile image

KeithTax 4 years ago from Wisconsin

It has been a while since I saw you around, blondepoet. What a beautiful, heartfelt poem.


Lucky Cats profile image

Lucky Cats 4 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

Blondepoet, I am so sorry for your loss. A little girl who can no longer run to her father. No matter our age; our father; our daddy will always be that 'bigger than life' and 'best of all' fathers. The emptiness and loss is palpable in your introduction and the beautifully heart wrenching poem you've written in honor of, and as a tribute to your loving father. Have faith that we shall all see our loved ones again as we go from this step to the next in the progression towards perfect love. Absolutely beautifully said and written. What a wonderful relationship you and your father share. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


Dardia profile image

Dardia 4 years ago from Michigan

If I could have written my feelings down when my father died I believe they would have been much the same as yours here. I feel your tremendous love and grief for your father in your dedications. Using your creativity to help you through the grieving is very helpful.

I was too young to do so with my father but when my mother died a couple of years ago I did just that. I have dedications here on hubpages for both of them now. Strand of Pearls is about losing my father and the strength of a wonderful woman, my mother, carrying on with her 11 children.

You may find yourself talking to him when no one else is around. Believe me even though you can't see a sign, he is there with you. He is holding you tight and whispering everything will be alright. He loves you more than anything and will always be in your heart and soul.

Voted up, beautiful, and useful.

+ God bless you and keep you safe always!

Darlene


PeanutButterWine profile image

PeanutButterWine 4 years ago from North Vancouver, B.C. Canada

oh this really struck me deeply as my father passed away suddenly a few years ago :( I am so sorry for your loss blondepoet. I truly understand the space left behind when we lose a parent, while it does change us and over time becomes less of an acute pain, there will always be those moments you think of them, how could you not? Hugs to you my friend!


timorous profile image

timorous 4 years ago from Me to You

Wow...such a beautiful and heartfelt poem. It's always a blessing when we are so deeply touched by another human being, or even an animal. Others are not so lucky to have such a deep relationship. I'm sure no words I can impart will make you feel that much better. But you must let the past be, Deb. You need to move on. Just remember the good things that your father represented, without the regret that his presence is no longer possible.

It's great to see you back, after a long sabbatical. Be strong.

Hugs...timorous.


qlcoach profile image

qlcoach 4 years ago from Cave Junction, Oregon

Grief hurts and it's okay to express it in the healthy ways that you presented in this hub. Beautiful writing. I had a similar experience recently. If your not too busy feel free to find out more of "What I Know." Sending you rainbow colored Light....Gary.


Sage Williams profile image

Sage Williams 4 years ago

I am so very sorry to hear about the passing of your dad. Your poem is a beautiful tribute and heartfelt goodbye. How lucky you are to have had such a beautiful relationship with your dad.

I have always heard people say that a mother's prayers are the strongest prayers. In this particular case, a daughter's prayers to her daddy, is amazingly powerful, there is no doubt your daddy can hear you!

Your deeply heartfelt connection seems to be at a soul level. I am sure that you will continue to feel your dad's presence as his spirit finds ways to send his love and comfort you.

Please know that your friends and fellow writers are here for you in your time of sorrow.

Hugs from heaven to you,

Sage


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Justateacher thank you for your beautiful words. I feel your pain too and am so sorry...I knew my Dads death would one day be hard but could never prepare myself for the heartache I am feeling. xx

Moms secret wow what you said is so very true. Wow the support of you guys has been overwhelming xx

Hey Keith you know I love u xx


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Oh Lucky Cats your beautiful comment made me smile to think what wonderful people like you are out there and that really care. Thankyou xx

Dardia what precious words, can never thank you enough xx

Oh Peanut I too am very sorry for you, I give you a huge hug right back at you. Thanks so much for leaving your love xx


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Oh Tim would love to give you a big hug. Just having you around strengthens me. I am trying so very hard love u xx


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Gary I send my love right back at you. You guys are just wonderful xx

Oh Sage I have missed you my beautiful friend. Just seeing you stop here comforts me so much. Big hugs to you xxxxxxxxxx


sofs profile image

sofs 4 years ago

I am sorry to hear of your father's passing on. This poem is a beautiful tribute to a great father... You are blessed to have known such great love..your words are so heartfelt and I am sure that your father is proud of you...You have a great treasure to live with BP, each memory is a gem..treasure them. ((((hugs ))) to you and God bless!


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Aww thanks sofs love u heaps. I guess it explains me being away but like my life as always gone I will be strong again, have just been awfully lost and weak. Big hugs xx


Zabbella profile image

Zabbella 4 years ago from NJ-USA

This was a beautiful tribute to your Dad. I lost my husband a few years ago and shortly after his death as I still grieved, a chubby, brown bird with an orange belly stood right in front of me and just stayed there chirping merrily. He reminded me of my beloved and that was my sign that he was alright. Keep an open mind, and you will get your sign. God Bless, Zab


SimeyC profile image

SimeyC 4 years ago from NJ, USA

I am sorry for your loss and feel your words are a great testament to your father. I know you are lost now, I was when my mother passed several years ago - and I know it's no consolation today - but eventually you will remember the good times, and while you will be sad, it won't feel as bad as it does today. Just know that you have a wonderful angel to watch over you....


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 4 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York

BP,

My heart and condolences go out to you. I didn't know that you lost your father until today. I just finished writing a story about my father today and am in shock to discover your loss. I shudder to think of how it will be without either of my parents and don't know how I will be able to cope. It takes courage to write about him and that much I know. He was fortunate to have such a dutiful daughter and this poem epitomizes such.

Love,

Dohn


blake4d profile image

blake4d 4 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings

Yahoo, BP is back. Love you darling, great job. Keep on Hubbing. Blake4d


kulikoff profile image

kulikoff 4 years ago from Moldova

You are loving daughter and kind person.

I am able to share your pain.

God bless you.


mtsi1098 4 years ago

I believe that there are unbelievable strengths that come from true passion and that is what I felt from reading this. My thoughts and prayers go to you during this healing process...cheers


logic,commonsense 4 years ago

BP, my deepest sympathies for the loss of your father. My heart goes out to you for the pain you are feeling.

The beauty of your tribute is just one more example of the depth and beauty of your mind and soul! There is no doubt your father is so proud of you, your strength and courage as you have faced challenges most of us never have to encounter. You will come out of this trial, stronger than ever.

Whenever you feel the need for a helping hand, a shoulder to lean out, just call out my name and I'll coming running, yes I will; when you need a friend!

Just incredibly happy that you are back among us. Your smile, your wit and wisdom are cherished and welcomed back! xoxox!


Dolores Monet profile image

Dolores Monet 4 years ago from East Coast, United States

What a beautiful tribute to your father. You remind us how important relationships are, how we must make sure we say what needs to be said, and how we need to spend quality time with the people we love. When my father died, I felt like a big hole was torn in my life. Helping him move, during his final days, I hurt my back. At his funeral, every step was painful, my back hurt so. But when I woke up one day, and the back ache was gone, I cried for that loss of connection to Daddy.


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Oh Zabella what an amazing thing to happen. Oh I also offer my sympathies to you. Big hugs xx

Oh Simey how wonderful to see all you guys..I am sooo sorry for you losing your Mum too, big hugs to you too darling. xx

Oh Dohn I am one of your biggest fans just love when you come by. Its been so long I have been here and I missed you guys so much xx

Oh Blakey right back at you.Your support here and Facebook has meant the world xx

Thankyou so much Kulikoff for stopping by so much appreciated x


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Oh mtsi omg I am seeing all my favorite people. God reading all these wonderful messages truly warms my heart xx

Oh Logic what a beautiful thing to say. I actually am smiling and my heart is singing. And shedding a single tear. Love u heaps xx

Oh darling Dolores omg so many people here have lost their Dad too, so you would know exactly the pain. I am sooo sorry for your loss too. Big hugs my beautiful friend xx


DevLin profile image

DevLin 4 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

I feel your pain, Kid. With this beautiful of a tribute, maybe you should remember, you now continue your Father by acting as he did, and treating those around you as he did. What he was doing for you to learn. He is permanently in your heart, as long as you remember to be him, whenever possible. As I'm trying to do, with mine. It still makes me want to call him by doing this, but after 26 years, he still makes me smile, when I retell one of his corny jokes. Be strong. Dev


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Hiya Devlin have missed you. You are so right he his inside of me in so many ways,,,I just miss him so much...your words are beautiful and I will treasure them coming from you, thank you so much xx


Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 4 years ago from USA or America

Hey Blondepoet, very beautifully written. I can understand the grief process and it's duration seems like forever. But, you will have the inner strength to continue on, because you know he would want you to, just like you said. I know what it's like to lose a father and from time to time I still think of him at certain times. For me, it's been over 20 years already and that time has passed faster than I ever thought possible. Keep in touch. :) Voted up! Marked as beautiful! :) Btw- Welcome Back to Hubpages! :)


rebekahELLE profile image

rebekahELLE 4 years ago from Tampa Bay

No words, darlin. My love and deep condolences to you. xo

[it's good to see you again.]


TheManWithNoPants profile image

TheManWithNoPants 4 years ago from Tucson, Az.

Hey girl!

This is my second comment, and this one is nothing more than a pimp job.

I've been so busy writing my anti political political blogs, I haven't written a song or poem in eons. I wrote a very dark poem yesterday and published it. It's called "Making The Cut" It's raw and hard, but I promised transparency so ..... I just thought you may be interested, but warning .. it can be a mood killer. The other side of my super positive self. (laughing)

jim


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Oh Cags you would know exactly how I feel, its great to be home buddy. Yes Xmas sure will be quite sad this year, but life goes on ....its never easy, big hugs xx

Aww Rebekah hugs right back at you xxxxx

Man With No Pants I hope you have found the elastic to your pants lol. At least I can still laugh at times, no killing my humorous side. I will check it out see you there xx


cynamans profile image

cynamans 4 years ago from Washington DC

Hi blondepoet,

your poem was beautiful. It made me think of my beloved mother who died in a similiar fashion as your beloved father this year. Your hub bought tears to my eyes. Keep up the good work. voted up and beautiful.

best C


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 4 years ago from australia Author

Thanks so much cynamans I am so so sorry to hear of your loss also xxx


Express10 profile image

Express10 4 years ago from East Coast

I thank you for such a wonderful poem. Your words perfectly describe what I've been feeling since my father passed 6 years ago.


mts1098 profile image

mts1098 4 years ago from InsideTheManCave

I believe that there are unbelievable strengths that come from true passion and that is what I felt from reading this. My thoughts and prayers go to you during this healing process...cheers...hope all is well


leigh anns page profile image

leigh anns page 4 years ago from New Jersey

What a beautiful poem. You expressed with the deepest of love. So sorry for your loss. I lost my father a couple of years ago and wished I had said all the things I had locked away in my heart.


Dolores Monet profile image

Dolores Monet 4 years ago from East Coast, United States

My father always said to leave people in a good way, on a cheerful note, to always say "I love you" just in case you never see them again. Be glad that it was your father who went before you - the loss of a child is the most horrible thing in the world. We all lose our fathers. It is nature's way. But love never dies. I feel my father's love and guidance, his sense of the absurd every day. I am sure your dear daddy's love will be in your heart forever.

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