Funny Presidential Quotes

Some presidents become famous for their wit and eloquence. Others are famous for their sense of humor. Still others become infamous due to embarrassing verbal gaffes. The following list of quotes contain examples of each of these categories.

These are in no particular order. Some of these quotes were made on the campaign trail, before their speaker became president.

“Gentlemen, I can run the country or I can control Alice. I cannot do both.” - Theodore Roosevelt, talking about his feisty daughter Alice.

“It’s true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?” – Ronald Reagan

“I am not fit for this office and should never have been here.” Warren G Harding (most historians agree with him)

“There is nothing left to do but get drunk” – Franklin Pierce, after learning he was not going to be nominated for re-election.

“No man who ever held the office of president would congratulate a friend on obtaining it.” – John Adams

“You lose.” - Calvin Coolidge, when a woman told him she had made a bet that she could get him to say more than two words.

“Be yourself. That proved to be the worst advice I could possibly have. And I’m going to be myself. Do it that way.” - George HW Bush’s incoherent response to an awkward question about how his administration would be different from Ronald Reagan’s.

It depends on what the meaning of the world ‘is’ is.” – Bill Clinton

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee – I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee – that says, fool me once, shame on – shame on you. Fool me – you can’t get fooled again.” – George W Bush

“I know that the human being and fish can co-exist peacefully!” – George W Bush

Well, I wish some of you would tell me the brand of whiskey that Grant drinks. I would like to send a barrel of it to my other generals.” – Abraham Lincoln, referring to his best Civil War general (and future president) U.S. Grant, who was known as a heavy drinker.

Common-looking people are the best in the world - that is why the Lord makes so many of them." - Abraham Lincoln

“I’ve now been in 57 states, one left to go.” - Barack Obama