Why doesn't my dog ever buy me treats?

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   Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years ago

   Why doesn't my dog ever buy me treats?
   
   I buy him treats all the time and take him for walks and play fetch with him and stuff.  But he never buys me any treats.  How do I get him to do this?
   
   While we're at it, I'd also like him to start taking himself for walks and picking up his own poop.
   
   

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2. 91

   wordscribe43posted 11 years ago

   I know, right?  I think my dogs should get jobs, too.  They have WAY more energy than I do.  One of them is part Australian Shepherd- he could get paid a mint to herd sheep at a farm. And they should start driving ME to the park.  Clearly they want to drive since I always find them sitting in the driver's seat.  You and I are on the same page, Ari.  I say it's time they do their share.  Sheesh!

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      Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      LOL!  Great answer!

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3. 76

   Nettlemereposted 11 years ago

   
   
   I'm optimistic that one day I'll come home from work and the dogs will have the dinner ready for me. They definitely seem to me to be the ones with the brains in this situation.

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      Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Great picture and funny answer!

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4. 93

   agilitymachposted 11 years ago

   Ari, a good dog trainer will have their dogs trained to buy you treats.  A well trained dog should already be making a lot of money (look at Lassie!), and then with only a little bit of training, they should easily be able to maneuver through a grocery store, restaurant, convenience store, etc. to get you the treats you love.
   
   Clearly, you need to get into advanced obedience training with a positive reinforcement clicker trainer.  Then your dogs will get you those treats.
   
   I'm currently training my dogs to drive the car to the dog shows we attend that are five to eight hours from our house.  Then, rather than me driving them home after a tiring show weekend, they can drive me home while I sleep in a padded, comfy crate.
   
   Dogs can do ANYTHING.  You just need to be a better dog trainer.

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      Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      LOL!  I'd like to see a video of that!

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5. 74

   MickiSposted 11 years ago

   I'm sure Lovebug will start buying you treats as soon as you start providing him with an allowance. You wouldn't want him to resort to stealing, would you?
   
   Kisha had once offered to buy me treats if she ever got a job in television. Since that never happened, she decided that she could pick up her own poop...and eat it, too. Since that's gross, I proposed that I would pick up her poop so long as she promised to be my best friend and never leave my side. I've got her back, so to speak, if she had mine.
   
   The deal was struck.
   
   And we kept it for 11 years until last month when she passed. *sniff*

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      wordscribe43posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Oh no!  Micki I'm so sorry...  That is one of the hardest things to go through.  I'm just about to put my 17 year old cat to sleep and I'm bracing myself.  Sorry for your loss.

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      agilitymachposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I'm sorry about Kisha's passing, Micki.  You had each other's back for a long time.

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      Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Awwww, Micki, that's such a sweet and sad story!

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      MickiSposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks wordscribe43. I wish you the best in dealing with your cat. My thoughts are with you.

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   DrMark1961posted 11 years ago

   Hi Ari, my dog does not buy me treats but she will carry home a coconut from the beach. I am not really sure if it is for me or her though.
   She does have a job. She is a physical therapist, and a cheap one at that. Have you ever written a check to a human doing that job? My dog gets me up out of my chair and exercises the leg and hip I broke in my accident a few years ago. Try to get a human physical therapist to work with you on weekends!
   My dog also has a part-time job as a mental health therapist. She practices kinhin, which is the Zen art of walking meditation. I have to walk with her of course, so I also benefit from the meditation.
   Peace. Walk the way of the dog on the beach.

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      Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Hilarious answer!

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   Rochelle Frankposted 11 years ago

   Dog need money to buy treats. But it doesn't matter if you give them an allowance or get them a job, they are terrible at handling money.
   I had a terrier shred a twenty dollar bill, and even ate  about $2.35 worth of it. 
   And you have probably seen that picture of the dogs playing poker while smoking and drinking. Once they get money they just fritter it away on vices.

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      Ari Lamsteinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      LOL!

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   fpherj48posted 11 years ago

   If you want your dog to buy you treats, you may want to consider raising his allowance.....and waving that raise under his nose....may encourage him to pick up his own poop.  Should your dog feel you are being unfair about anything.....I'm sure he'll take that walk by himself.....directly to the nearest S.P.C.A.

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