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Writer's Interview: Martie Coetser

Updated on October 11, 2016
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In an English course at Villanova University in 1981, Maria interviewed her mom, who likened her to Barbara Walters. She never looked back.


Meet Martie

Martie Coetser is a force to be reckoned with. She is fiercely intelligent, passionate, diligent and endearingly direct.

She writes with a visceral in your face style that leaves many a reader wondering: "Is this chick talking about me"? That, in my humble opinion, takes a talent that is hard to come by, as I am forever amazed at the universality of mankind.

Hope ya'll will enjoy this up close and personal glimpse of Martie:

The times I feel most relaxed are ....

Geezzz, Maria, I just can’t tell you this in public. Let me rather give you my second most relaxed state of being – the zone between being awake and asleep.

{Ooohh, don't go there... at least not on HubPages! Your second answer is soo proper!}

The times I feel saddest are...

During partings, though I am not suffering Separation Anxiety. I am extremely independent, but tend to get too fond of, or too attached to, or simply addicted to people I allow in my personal zone. I find it extremely hard to say goodbye, although I will pretend to be unaffected by goodbyes as I will rather be dead as somebody’s responsibility or object of sympathy.

Something I'd like to teach others...

To understand, accept and love themselves and also their fellow man.

My secret passion ... my dream job....

A performing musician – a pianist able to play many other instruments.

Most hated gift I ever gave someone ...

Total freedom. Just before my son’s 21st birthday he told me that he appreciated my love for him, but it was too much for him to bear - he felt ruled by me. I was devastated - totally unaware of his brooding agitation. So I’ve spent the night alone in the middle of my favorite game reserve and ‘gave birth’ to him, painfully. Until today I believe that the heart of a mother is like her womb. Her babies grow in her womb until they’re ready to be born, and then they grow in her heart until they’re ready to live their lives as independent individuals. I must emphasize: Pushing someone out of my heart, does not in any way mean breaking emotional bonds with him/her. It simply means I no longer carry the person in me; I have given them complete freedom to live their own lives as they wish. (Of course this is the most hated gift I give to others, because if I could have it my way, I would have kept my beloveds locked up in my heart where I could feed, love and protect them without much ado.)

The gift I could have done without ...

A grown cat named Oliver and his gifts to me. Oh, dear! At first he preferred my closet above his sandbox – for doing the bad and the worse. Maria, believe me, nobody wants to know the stinking detail. Because I’ve learned the hard way to keep the doors of my closet closed, he discovered my son’s closet. Oh boy! To make a long story short, on my way to give Oliver as a gift to a friend who was living on a farm plagued with mice, dear Oliver left me his most awful gift on the floor of my car.

Take my word, Maria, for almost ten years, until the day I sold the car, I had tried in vain everything under the sun to get rid of the smelly memory of that gift. (So now everybody knows the profoundness of the cat sh@t in my soapy.)

{Thank you for sharing your FELINES, Sista... I thought something smelled fishy in your soapie!}

If you peeked in my junk drawer, you'd be surprised to find ...

Many manuscripts to be edited according to an editor’s idea of success.

My date from Hades ....

Oh no, don’t let me remember this one….

My worst or funniest vacation story ....

Let me just mention the worse, as the funniest are for many years now the order of the day. My worse vacation stories - oh, one is as worse as the other – happened during the first couple of vacations with my in-laws. It was hard for me to understand and accept their ways and manners – I felt lost and insecure for many years, although I (successfully) pretended to be self-assured. I was not sure whether my too-strict Christian parents had prepared me sufficiently for adulthood.

However, today those many stories simply prove my personal obscurantism, ultra-conservativeness and narrow-mindedness during that era of my life.

A life goal on my bucket list

To die as a person who will always have a positive influence on my descendants.

What I most look for in a friend...

intelligence, astuteness, the quality of being deep, strong and intense, honesty, integrity, unselfishness, open-mindedness, a healthy sense of humor, a positive mentality (even while suffering depression) and most of all the ability to love others as much as they love themselves.

Something I will never part with...

I guess ‘something’ does not mean my children and grandchildren – for only death will make me part with them. A materialistic object would be my piano.

From Martie: "My Legacy: The Final Journey"

A life lesson I will never forget

When I was eleven, I acquired the habit to make up stories in order to impress my friends. I would tell them I’ve been here and there and I’ve done this and that and so forth, until the day I could no longer remember what I’ve told them and what not. The embarrassment I experienced during the very first exposure of my fraud was overwhelming. So I’ve promised myself to never again present lies as the truth.

Of course, in my capacity as a writer of fiction I can, and may, lie like a trooper. After all, stories are the truth with bows and tails.

The worse part of getting older...

Growing wrinkles and saggy muscles. (Besides walking, dancing and wrestling with the man I love, I don’t enjoy physical exercises.)

A writing lesson I learned the hard way...

Never explain your writings to an editor/publisher or even a reader. They are the gods in your writers-world; if you cannot please them, find others you can please or stop writing.

My favorite movie and why...

Wuthering Heights and many others. Why? Oh, Maria, I need a lot of space to explain why certain events and human behavior - whether in reality or in movies - touch the core of my soul. Let me rather answer the ‘why’ with a hub.

What subjects / genres do you enjoy reading/ about?....

I do have a keen interest in everything that exists and even in everything that does not exist. I can honestly not determine a most favorite subject or genre.

What would be a subject/ genre that you would like to read more/ about...

I will never get enough of psychology. Human behavior and even the behavior of animals fascinate me. I am also interested in quantum physics, although I am still struggling to ‘get it’…

Can you take us to a favorite piece of writing on HubPages by you that does not get much traffic...

My writings are like my children and grandchildren. I am not at all able to determine a favorite. Each and every one is a piece of my soul.

But I did my best and decided to acknowledge two travel hubs I've written about South Africa:

South Africa (traveling from Klerksdorp to Pretoria)

South Africa~ North West Province~ (traveling from Klerksdorp to Groot Marico~ Part 1)

As you know I write in most genres, so this is a sampling of my potpourri of hubs.

What song makes you want to pack up and leave the party?

You mean a song I don’t like? I am actually able to like and appreciate all music…

But let me be honest, down here is a specific genre of Afrikaans music that puts me into a blue funk. They are ‘sing-a-longs’ and unbelievable popular among Afrikaans people who live in the rut of work-rugby-barbecue-sleep. Heaven knows I am not judging, I am simply not at all able to appreciate this particular song and others in the same genre…. All my fault – ‘lack of taste’ (And forgive me dear Robbie, you know you are successful and you don’t even need me as a fan. Unfortunately nobody can be everybody’s hero.)

OK, Sista, I listened to some of this for myself... enuff said...!

Wait, Maria, I do love this song. I just discovered it by destiny's Child. Although the words are not at present applicable, as I have finally met Mr B, it was very applicable during critical stages of my life and it will always be when I have to cope with any adversaries.

Oh my gosh, Sista, how could you know that I, too, can identify with this...?

Beyonce with Destiny's Child: Survivor

Thank you, Martie ....

Sista, it was SUPREMELY SIMPLE for me to select this song for you: "In and Out of Love". Fingers crossed for you and Mr. B... ! I'm willing to revise this song down the pike?!

Thank you for this interview and the joy, friendship and perspectives you bring to my life.

© Maria Jordan (revised July, 2015)

Diana Ross And The Supremes: In And Out Of Love


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