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Hubbers I Want to Date: A Hubber Dating Service
Have you ever wanted to date another hubber? Sure you have. You glance at her avatar, listen to her forum posts, read her hubs, and dreamed of a HubPages dating service.
Before you get too giddy, guys, let me set some ground rules and explain why I am doing this. There is no doubt in my mind that I will catch all heck for writing this hub. After 10 weeks of 16 hour works days without a day off I'm a little punchy. Tax guys get giddy, too, you know.
Disclaimer (There will be a lot of these): I am married with two beautiful daughters. I intend on staying married… to the same woman. I don’t really want to date anyone. Got it? I’m just a man letting it out.
Ground rules: Don’t be offended. If you make the list; don’t report me to the police as a stalker. One more arrest and I spend a lifetime at taxpayer expense; remember the three strikes law. If you don’t make the list; don’t complain. No nasty email. I know you are hot, but my fingers can do only so much typing and it is Friday night, I am tired, and once I get some sleep I am sure to think this is a really bad idea.
So why am I doing it: Absolute and utter shameless promotion. Most of my hubs are about taxes. My traffic is low, but those that come are interested in the material. Okay, the IRS is after them and they want me to bail them out. I also want hot babes to stare in awe at a balding, middle aged tax preparer and go “Owwwwww.”
Guess Who This Beautiful Hubber Is?
How Do You Make the List?
- First, I have to know you exist.
- Next, I must find you interesting.
- Third, you can’t freak me out. Okay. You have an advantage if you freak me out. I’m sick. Get it. I prepared 200 corporate tax returns this year already. What do you expect?
I will provide a link to each chosen hubber’s profile. No pictures. You have to check out her profile if you want a picture.
I will provide the reason each hubber was chosen.
Let the games begin.
Contestant #1: Maddie Ruud
An ideal date with Maddie would include a serious look around HP headquarters and a deep Q&A (I am the Q) on how to improve my hub score. Perhaps I can even get a glimpse at the computer code used in calculating the score.
Contestant #2: Anath
Anath is one of my first followers. You want pull with me, ya gotta follow. I can be purchased cheap.
The draw here is lips. Those beautiful, red, plump, moist, lovely lips. Stop it, Keith. They are just lips. Mmmm, I know. Lipssssss.
Contestant #3: AEvans
AEvans is my first follower. She also spends a lot of time helping others in the forums. I never heard her speak a harsh word to anyone. She is all class in my book.
Her avatar is a black and white photo. Yes, black and white can show kindness, charm, and warmth. I have no idea if that is a real photo of her. To me, she is my first follower and my black and white dream girl.
Contestant #4: Blondepoet
Blondepoet is the most prolific poster in The Hubber’s Hangout forum and a follower of yours truly. Blondepoet is funny, helpful and knockout gorgeous. If I want a date with a hubber for all the wrong reason, blondepoet is it. Sorry, blonde.
She is quick to share a story or provide guidance. If you don’t believe me, check out The Hubber’s Hangout. She is funny and fun. If you have not read her hubs, stop right now, go to her profile, and start reading.
Blondepoet has no problem being sexy. Read her hubs and forum posts for examples. I want a date with blonde because she seems like a very nice person with a real sense of humor. Something the world could use a little more of.
Contestant #5: Relache
Ralache has helped more hubbers than anyone I know. Her advice is straight forward with links to the proper places within HP. She is firm, never condescending. Relache has been here a long time and has a rich history. Check out her profile for more.
I always want to say her name differently: Rachel or something similar. Her avatar is a drawing I presume is of her. I want a date with Relache to see what she looks like in real life and talk shop. After the HP staff, I think Relache is the most knowledgeable.
Contestant #6: Patty Inglish
Patty is one of my mystery ladies. Her avatar is a silhouette or shadow of a business class woman. That is the way I see Patty. Her hubs are all professional. She is prolific, helpful, follows me (must have class), and is one of my HP heroes.
On my date with Patty, I first want to see what she really looks like. Second, I want to congratulate her for the volume of quality material she produces. Then I want to ask her how she researches her hubs.
If you want to get smart, read Patty Inglish. She has some really gooooood hubs.
Contestant #7: KCC Big Country
This is no time to monkey around, but KCC still makes the list. Her name is Karen and her avatar is a cute little monkey. She is a frequent Hub Challenger and cheers other hubbers on that also take the challenge. To me, Karen (KCC) needs the Hub Challenge to prod her on. She found the tool that works for her.
KCC helps a lot of other hubbers around this place. She encourages at every turn. I want a date with KCC so I can see who she really is. I am just curious to see the face behind the kind monkey avatar.
Contestant #8: Entertainmentplus
I want to include a few new hubbers in the list as well. Since I don’t know much about newer hubbers (other than a few forum posts and their hubs), I will rely on lust.
The avatar of Entertainmentplus has me all excited; then I read her hubs on lingerie. Ahhh. I am so sorry. She has the look. This is a date I really should not go on. It would give me a heart attack.
Contestant #9: Prettydarkhorse
I am missing so many beautiful women in this hub, but I can not leave out Prettydarkhorse. She is a regular in the forums and it is a pleasure seeing her face in a thread. She is quick to laugh and share a story or provide help.
Prettydarkhorse mesmerizes me. I know there is a story there I am not seeing; a story behind that smile and light nature. Her profile says she once taught college students. I am drawn to that because I love learning. Her attitude is the biggest reason I want a date with her. I can imagine hours of pleasant conversation.
Contestant #10: Shazwellyn
Shaz is an interesting choice for me. Her avatar appears to me as a naked woman facing away, her back covered in tattoos. She also writes children's stories. And good ones, too.
I thought of including Shaz in the original 10, but shied away due to her avatar. I try to place a relevant Amazon capsule next to each contestant. What do I put for Shaz? Tattoos? Children's books?
Her avatar is attractive. But I want inner beauty. I reviewed some of her forum posts and hubs today and came to the conclusion she has more inner beauty than just about anyone.
On my date with Shaz, I want to know if her avatar is really her and if she is covered in tattoos. An evening of coffee and light conversation with Shaz would be truly pleasant. I want to know more about her stories and why she writes them.
Note: Shaz has a real honor in the 11th spot. After the US Constitution was finished, 10 Amendments, the Bill of Rights, was added. The 1st Amendment covers the most fundamental and important rights of mankind. Shaz is the 1st Amendment of this hub.
Thanks for the good reading, Shazwellyn. My girls enjoy your stories, too.
- If you are on the list and offended, let me know. You will be removed.
- If you are not on the list and think you should be, send me your phone number.
- List any hubber you would like to date and why in the comments section.
- If you want to sue me over this hub, send it here.
- Remember, on HubPages, following is not stalking. Don't call the police. Please.
- No, I will not write a hub on male hubbers I would like to date.
- If you get a date from this hub and later get married, feel free to thank me. Don't bother blaming me.
- Maddie thinks I'm a pervert, so read this hub fast. My account is about ready to be banned.
- When I sober up I may delete this hub all on my own.
- I may update and expand this hub in the future. Stay tuned.
Who is your favorite hubber?
After thinking about this hub for a day, I decided it is tacky at best. My original idea was to produce a list of hubbers with a sexy avatar. That would have been real tacky and there is no way I could bring myself to do it.
What I did here was provide a short list of female hubbers with true beauty on the inside. My hope was that the title would be misconstrued as romantic dating versus intellectual dating. I still think it is tacky.
Sure, I focused on inner beauty. No one complained. But I still feel like a hack for writing this hub. I wrote it for all the wrong reasons. I thought it would be a nice traffic generator. Ego is a terrible to satiate because it is insatiable.
So, should I delete this hub? I am still undecided. For the time being it will stay.
I noticed Relache stated in a forum post today that her avatar is a sketch of her. I have no idea if she mentioned this because she read this hub or not. It is nice to know.
There are so many worthy female hubbers with inner beauty. I need to include hundreds to be fair.
For now, I will add to the list as time permits. If I still think this hub is too tacky or condescending, down it comes.