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The Hubnuggets teams newest Kafuffle--Or--De Gree-nck who almost stole Oktoberfest!
Story time once again. Come on in everyone, here in Canada it's the fall once again. The wind is huffing and puffing and trying to blow the house down. The leaves are doing their last dance off the trees. Although melancholy this is one of my favorite times of the year and a great time to get together with friends and curl up in front of the fireplace. We can be sipping hot apple cider, spiked of course, or hot toddies, and of course in honor of our story today Glühwein (mulled wine, that's what I'm having, yum).
Oh goodie there are some more of you, come on in don't be shy, there is loads of room... pull up some of those rocking chairs or plop your butts on a big cushy pillow right here by the fire. (... noooo, no I didn't say you had a big butt) Just grab a seat already, I have a really doozie story to share with you.
Let me set the scene: It was a beautiful 15th of September 2010 at 6:59 am eastern standard time when our ultra new phone at hubnugget-head-office rang off the wall. Even it's shrill ringing gave away that there was some sort of emergency going on---after all the big-wigs at hubpages are in a different time zone in Californ-knee-i-a.
As I was closest to the telyphone I answered. From the other end came came the voices of Maddie-Never-gets-ruffled-feathers intertwined with Simone-Cool-as-a-cucumber. Their voices were high-pitched and coming at me in hyper speed. From this I gathered that we were all in a 'let's-panick' situation.
The words that my poor old ears were able to distinguish were "200th year for the Oktoberfest in Munich Germany"...... "festivities can not start on the 18th of September" ....... "...every pair of Lederhosen has been stolen and are being held hostage with next weeks hubnugget wannabes being the price for their release"... "a hubber calling himself De Gree-n-ck has claimed responsibility for this heinous act".
For all of you who might not be familiar with 'Oktoberfest' here is a short explanation. It's a fun filled enormous, world-famous fair, usually lasting 15 to 18 days originating in Munich, Bavaria Germany with a hefty 5 million people attending yearly. The festival is held in the Theresienwiese (which translates into 'the field of Therese'). The fest, which started out as only horse races on October 12/1810 was first held in honor of the marriage of then Crown Prince Ludwig and Princess Therese of Saxe-Hildeburghausen.
Modeled after the Munich event many cities worldwide also celebrate Oktoberfest. Kitchener, Ontario, Canada (in my neck of the woods) prides itself for being the largest one in North America.
Our job or mission was to get over to Theresewiese in Munich undercover. Not only did we have to find all the Lederhosen but we also had to find the evilest of all evil 'De Gree-n-ck'.
SciPi was going to be behind the scenes organizing the lot. SciPi in her calm, calmer and calmest fashion doled out our jobs. After all, millions were expecting --- Bratwurst mit Sauerkraut, --- Schnitzel mit Knödel und Rot-kraut, --- Pretzels mit sehr viel Bier. (...with lots of beer) and let me tell you these didn't grow on trees, these had to be prepared and served.
The stage for the entertainment had to be built and set-up which became De Greek's first task, with many more to follow.
Our very own Hubpages Staffers came forward to save the day by practising the Lederhosen-Can-Can on the plane ride over.
To get their arms all limber for their task of filling the thousands of beer-steins from the enormous vats of beer, Maddie and Simone lifting weights to build up their biceps, triceps and even their what-you-may-call-cepts on the trip over (you should see their arm muscles pop, woooweeh, ***warning*** do not engage in any arm wrestles with them in the near future because you will lose).
RedElf and Enelle the Kit-cats were put in charge of the Bratwurst, Schnitzel etc tents.
KoffeeKlatch Gals wearing their fabulous disguise were able to blend in with the crowd and it was their job to search out the infamous De Gree-n-ck.
Speaking German, I was put into the job of taking orders and serving the beer. (I could feel my feet complaining already)
Well ... let me correct myself here... these were our pretend jobs, our camouflage if you like. Obviously our main objective was to save this weeks choice hubnuggets from becoming the ransom for a big pile of Lederhosen or Knickerbockers.
We got to our assigned places and jobs. I'm not sure what RedElf did to the sauerkraut, but man-o-man everyone came back for seconds and thirds and did they ever get thirsty, woooohwee were they a thirsty bunch. Enelle pulled me aside and asked me to taste-test her Schnitzel... wow it was so tender that it melted in my mouth and the Knödel (dumplings)... simply heaven, I must, must, must remember to get her recipe... Darn I'm on one of my tangents again....
But I must say it sure was fun watching the hubnugget staffers do their from now-on world-famous Lederhosen-Tango and Knickerbocker-Can-Can. (hear me whistling) Wow, look at those 'Hubba-Hubba" knees.
Sir De Greek is just what we needed to get this mess fixed up. He is to our hubnugget team what Lieutenant Templeton Peck or "Face," is to the ATeam. A smooth-talker who knows how to appropriate all the useful items, vehicles, the latest of speedy computer hook-ups etc. and best of all ... is on first name bases with many top people world wide (CIA, FBI, KGB...etc).
Well to make a somewhat long story even longer... Our own De Greek feeling bad that the mastermind behind the 'Lederhosen-Caper' had chosen a Hubber name so similar to his or was it closer to the Grinch... (hmmmmmm I don't know which) pulled out all the stops.
He called the IRS, the ABC, the NBC, CNN and the rest of the acronyms. He called in favours from here there and everywhere. He instantly became our hero when he was able to get us leads on De Gree-n-ck's hide-out.
De Gree-n-ck was feeling very secure when the Oktoberfest patron's started to arrive. He figured that in the middle of hundreds of thousands of people he would become one of them. He wasn't too smart though. The fiend forgot that as he was the only one wearing Lederhosen he was sticking out like a sore thumb. Once he realized his mistake he tried to run and blend in with the crowd. This is when the Koffee Klatch Gals took charge of the situation. They borrowed an approximate 20 foot long link of Bratwurst and used it like a lasso. They had the dangerous menace in custody in no time. The Lederhosen caper was over before it really began, the day was saved. Our choice hubnuggets were safe and sound along with all those knickerbockers.
It took days to sort out and return all those piles of Lederhosen. We, the team stayed on and helped for the first few days of the 200th anniversary Oktoberfest of 2010. Soon the rightful job-owners showed up in their rescued Lederhosen. We decided to also celebrate this historical fair. SciPi spent the rest of our time in Munich giving Karate demonstrations. The Germans coaxed RedElf and Enelle away to film a few segments of their famous 'Einer wird gewinnen' cooking show. De Greek went to spend some time with his pal the German Chancellor. Koffee Klatch Gals signed a book deal for their new book titled 'Disguises for every occassion'. Me, I grabbed a couple of bier-steins --- sat back, threw off my shoes and joined in the singing along with the rest of the Oktoberfest part-takers,
lets all sing....
"Ein Prosit ein Prosit gemüdlichkeit,
Ein Prosit ein Prosit gemütlichkeit
Eins, zwei, drei g'suffa!
Zicke, zacke, zicke, zacke!
Hoi, hoi, hoi! "
Which one of this week's Travel and Places nominees is your favorite?
- 8% Honolulu Hawaii History: The Royal Mausoleum at Mauna 'Ala
- 15% Serving Homeless Veterans-Albany Housing Coalition-Albany NY
- 44% Road Trip Tips
- 8% The Oregon Trail: Could We Survive It?
- 13% Top 7 Things to Watch Out for in the Desert
- 13% Beautiful Budapest
This poll is now closed to voting.
Which one of this week's Books, Literature, and Writing nominees is your favorite?
- 11% The Lines We Draw
- 18% Eileen's New Year
- 16% How to Punctuate Dialogue
- 24% A children's short story with a moral: A Bag of Feathers
- 18% What Makes a Manuscript Publishable
- 13% Book Review: A Writer's San Francisco by Eric Maisel
This poll is now closed to voting.
Which one of this week's Health nominees is your favorite?
- 17% Free Weight Loss Tips for Those Who Cannot Lose Weight
- 21% I'm quite well really
- 13% Mentally challenged individuals truly are "special"
- 23% Footcare for Runners, Ultrarunners, and Adventure Racers
- 11% High Blood Pressure and Exercise
- 15% Trapped inside your head
This poll is now closed to voting.
Last but not least our very own Special Correspondent Ripplemaker in her "tough grilling manner" brought the sordid truth out of our culprit.
This is his story:
De Gree-n-ck the fiend, had just recently joined Hubpages. As a matter of fact less then two months ago. He had followed the list and tips of how to write a bunch of great hubnugget hubs.
- He had written his Hubs on interesting topics, filled with original content (many hubs actually, two in each and every category)
- He wrote them from his experience and point of view
- They were all about 750-1000 words or so --- which is a good length
- He gave them all grabbing titles
- He checked and double checked his spelling and grammar
- He then emphasized the content with photos and a relevant video or two
- He gave the photos/videos source acknowledgements
- He added links and RSS feeds
- He pointed Twitter, Facebook etc towards his hubs
With other words he did everything he should have done to make sure his hubs were at their best. His dark and evil ultimate goal was to become the first hubber to receive two winnings in each of the three categories. However he didn't think the hubnugget team would find and showcase his hubs from amongst all the hundreds of great hubs written here in Hubland weekly. The list of new hubber-hubs is so vast and the team narrows the number of choices of Hubnugget wannabes down to just 18--- six in each category--- and only those finalists are then open to be voted on via a poll capsule.
De Gree-n-ck didn't want to take a chance. He wanted the rest of the new hubs out of the way so the team could only choose his hubs to showcase in this current week's HubNugget contest.
On a lesser note, he absolutely loves Lederhosen in every shape, type or colour. He has had a Lederhosen fetish for years and years and just can't get enough of them. So this caper was going to fulfill the two top numbers off of his bucket list.
To the nominees and winners alike, congrats!
We had 170 votes. This week saw some really fantastic hubs, and the winners sure are the cream of the crop! Here they are:
Travel and Places
Road Trip Tips (44%)
Serving Homeless Veterans-Albany Housing Coalition-Albany NY (15%)
Top 7 Things to Watch Out for in the Desert (13%)
Books, Literature, and Writing
A children's short story with a moral: A Bag of Feathers (24%)
Eileen's New Year (18%)
What Makes a Manuscript Publishable (18%)
Footcare for Runners, Ultrarunners, and Adventure Racers (23%)
I'm quite well really (21%)
Free Weight Loss Tips for Those Who Cannot Lose Weight (17%)