Jump to Last Post 1-3 of 3 discussions (4 posts)
  1. Nicole Winter profile image61
    Nicole Winterposted 9 years ago

    I'm moving in with my boyfriend.  On an earlier post I had mentioned how that wasn't really a possibility, but it turns out that they do evict you, eventually, if you don't pay the rent.  I've been walking around in a daze since I've been served my summons a couple of weeks ago.  I went to court today to find out I have two weeks to move out of my place + my landlord is suing me for the 2.8K I owe her. 

    My other option is to move in with my parents.  About an hour and a half or so away from the city I love, where I've lived the better part of 12 years.  I've been in a daze because well, not only is this a lot of stress, but I feel terrified now that I am actually getting this close to moving in with the person that I've been with for three years, and love more than anyone I have ever been with before... I feel like the situation has been forced on him and I'm not sure if we're strong enough as a couple to handle the stress of both of us being unemployed and one of us, (him,) becoming a father overnight.  (I have a six year old daughter that he has spent time with, which is completely different than living with.)

    I have no idea what I am doing.  So, in that vein, if anyone of you has any advice or feels like commenting, I'm hanging out tonight and really hyped up on Monster Energy drink.


    Nicole A. Winter

  2. Christoph Reilly profile image70
    Christoph Reillyposted 9 years ago

    I wish I could help you Nicole.  I have never been in exactly that position.  You are right that it will be a big adjustment.  It would be anyway, but with you both unemployed, that just makes it more difficult.  You don't mention how your parents feel about you moving in with them.  If they like the idea, that might be the best option right now.  Plus your child will be around her grandparents and it's always good to have family around. Besides, wouldn't that be easier on your daughter? Do you see your employment situation changing anytime soon?  It's quite common for kids to return to the roost these days and it's nothing to be embarrassed about.  I know it's far from where you want to be, but you are going to have to make a sacrifice somewhere.  Like you, I see the possibility of negatively impacting your relationship with your boyfriend, a relationship that you have already invested 3 years in.

    That being said, it's not the end of the world.  Relax a little.  Easy to say, I know, but pulling your hair out and worrying wont change anything.  How does your boyfriend feel about it?  Once, I had a girlfriend (we had foolishly become engaged quite quickly) with a young son move in with me.  I liked it just fine.  The kid was great and I was able to give him his own room and a computer, so he liked it too.  She, unfortunately, took advantage of my largesse, and I was forced to expel her from my life.  As I said at the time, "I'd keep the kid but she's got to go."  Anyway, point is, it can be very difficult.  If he is happy about the prospect, then that might be a good option.  I really don't have enough information to offer any more, which might not be worth anything anyway.  I just hate to see you so stressed out, though we don't really know each other.

    So, take a deep breath, tomorrow's a new day, blah, blah, blah.  But all that stuff is true. Tomorrow IS a new day.  Good luck.  If you need a sympathetic ear, contact me anytime.  - CR

    1. profile image0
      Leta Sposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      You're a good guy, Chris.  smile

      I saw this post, too, but didn't know exactly what to say.  But I believe, too, Nicole, you shouldn't worry so much.  That is probably more about your eviction notification and feeling 'forced' than anything else. 

      Being around other people's kids is not that bad!  (I should know.)  But I also don't pretend for a minute I'm their parent.  They have a perfectly fine mother.  I wouldn't stress your BF out with trying to cast him in that role.

      It'll be fine.  Take a deep breath.  Look at things in a positive light.  You always learn and gain from every change, I've found.

  3. Anna Marie Bowman profile image89
    Anna Marie Bowmanposted 9 years ago

    Nicole, my only advice is to trust your instincts.  If you are unsure about the strength of your relationship with your boyfriend, maybe you should move in with your parents, even temporarily, so that you can give your boyfriend some time.  That way, he may not feel forced into the decision.  It will give the two of you time to talk about it.  I know how difficult it can be to be a single mom, and have to make these decisions.  Best of luck to you!!!


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)