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I'd like feedback on my Hub: How to Rap Real?

  1. profile image69
    Bilu711posted 20 months ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub How to Rap Real? (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

  2. Rupert Taylor profile image99
    Rupert Taylorposted 20 months ago

    I am not qualified to comment on the content, rap being a completely closed book to me. I am qualified to comment on grammar, and your piece is filled with errors. Let's just look at one section.

    "So some people think they might rap that they smoke HASH and fight policemen while actually they didn't do any of this.Like i said before,There is no Universal Standard for rap today.You can rap anything if it is real and belongs to you.But be REAL!Fake people can't make it to the top because they lose any love for their rap because their rap seems like the job of a servant."

    So is unnecessary.
    "can" would be a much better word than "might."
    There should be a space after punctuation marks such as commas and periods.
    i should be capitalized.
    There is no Universal Standard - these words should not be capitalized.

    Many of these errors are repeated in your article. It won't pass QA until these are fixed.

    1. profile image69
      Bilu711posted 20 months agoin reply to this

      Thanks Alot....I will fix em..

      1. Johnny James A profile image76
        Johnny James Aposted 20 months agoin reply to this

        For the most part people use HubPages to tell people about a specific subject or to post a literary work of art like poetry.  Your article seems to fall into the initial category.  As such, you should work on the process of (1) Telling people what you are "going to" talk about; (2) then tell them what it "is" you are talking about, and then (3) recap.  From the title of your article, you want to discuss with your audience "How to rap real?" Rupert makes a good point in his earlier comment when he states “rap is a completely closed book to me” that you may need to explain what is rap and what it means to “rap real” in more detail as your audience on this forum comes from a wide audience.  For instance, if I were to write an article for Accountants Weekly I could get away with using a lot of known accounting terms and legalese (to a degree).  However, if I am trying to explain an accounting treatment on this site I have to make sure to articulate systematically my thought process, as most people are not accountants on this site, yet taxes affect their lives.  You should use your opening statements to discuss what “rap” is briefly, as most people know what it is.  Then discuss what “real” rap is, or what the definition of “realness” is. Once you have done this, then you can go ahead and tell them how you are going to take them down the road of explaining yourself and then explain it.  Another thing you should watch for are “titles” of your paragraphs  When you put in and “bold” a heading section such as “Rap for Money?” you are setting people up for what to expect in the coming paragraph.  When I read, “Rap for Money?” I honestly thought you were going to discuss information on who makes money from rap, or the percentage of rappers who can earn a living from rap. However, the paragraph went in many different directions. In another paragraph heading entitled “Who Am I?” you talk about unique rapping styles and naming yourself.  However, it was hard to understand how these two things are related.  I got in the end that the name you choose for yourself (stage name) might be a reflection of your life, but how does that influence your “rap style?” Does it influence your rap style or merely the subject matter of your rap?
        Next, I would recommend writing your article on Microsoft Word or if you do not have Microsoft Word, you can download a free Word Processing software like LibreOffice of WPS.  These software programs will help you with your grammar, spelling and punctuation. This is probably the most important thing you should work.  It is possible that the Hubpages crew will cut and paste your article into a word processing program and run a spelling, grammar, readability index.  The grammar and spelling check are self-explanatory. However, the readability index is something you can activate in Microsoft Word or other Word Processing program.  You can find the instructions by doing a Google search. A readability score is a score of what grade level your writing is at for your article.  A common misconception is that you want the readability score to be as high as possible (college level).  This is very wrong unless you are writing a thesis or professional publication.  You want to write your article so that it can be understood by the greatest audience as possible, while not insulting one’s intelligence. You want your readability score to be between the standard to Very Easy range. This means sentences should not be too long; and you should avoid using words so complicated that the average reader would need to pull out a dictionary to get your meaning. If your article requires you to use slang or a very specific word known in the rap community then you need to define your slang. 
        It is obvious you have a love for this topic, so I would recommend getting the Word Processing software first, then copy and paste your article. Come up with an outline for the exact things you want to talk about and then redo your paragraphs, and do a spelling, grammar, and readability index check.

        1. profile image69
          Bilu711posted 20 months agoin reply to this

          Thanks...I will download word processing software.